Haunted

It's just my mattress and I again,

Just tossing and turning again.

I'm pleading my mind go mute,

I'm ignored like most nights. 

I'm searching for solutions,

Digging into all that hurts me.

I'll smile way too big and pretend

That the night doesn't haunt me. 

The moisture collecting nauseates me,

I take a breath and wipe my eyes.

My world sometimes is too much...

I'm stuck on the repeat of memory. 

There used to hope in my heart,

And light stored in my soul. 

My smile decays as time flies,

I lie here and wonder why. 

Reviews

[Another Relic]

Told with authenticity. There are many reasons why people hurt an time can make life more torturous if we don't grab hold of our thoughts and tame them. Nicely done.

[Aarontastic]

I've read a few of your newer poems, and this is my favorite one so far. It deals with the subject of insomnia, in a way, and that's something that a lot of people can relate to which is good..it's a pretty decent write, but I can't help but feel that it's missing something >.

[Kaylor Mason]

Either you can own the Night, or the Night can own you. A big part of healing is is learning that the darkness can't hurt your heart, and choosing to embrace and own the Night, rather than fear it. The Night, with its darkness and haunting tranquility, is your friend, not your enemy. I learned this, and now the darkness and I get along great; I don't fear sleep or nightmares anymore (I wrote about that in Shadow Walker).
If there used to be hope in your heart, then your heart is simply waiting for more hope. For another. Don't view that as a loss; view it with freedom, as something new to look forward to. Something better is coming.
It's true, the night does have ghosts that haunt you. But as soon as you learn the Night is good, and embrace her in a hug, that's when all your ghosts learn their place in this world, and believe me--they won't bother you anymore. Trust me on that one; I know it from experience. [Thanks for letting me ramble]
As always: Beautiful Penmanship, my friend!

[Skye]

I can completly relate tonight, for I am unable to sleep at all. Its very pretty, and i love the flow. My favorite lines are 'my world sometimes is to much... i'm stuck on the repeat of memory'

[The White Wolf]

That pretty much sums up the vast majority of my nights. Yes, I know the "smile wat too big and pretend" feeling but the nights are something else, aren't they? That one on one time we get with ourselves can be pretty excruciating. This was written with a lost of rawness and honesty and I appreciate it.