Light

Written with the idea of "Namaste" in mind; look it up--it's beautiful! It's honoring the universe that dwells within everyone, a place of truth, love, peace and light.

I unzip this constricting skin,

Which keeps my soul trapped in,

Which defines the way I appear

And reflects my flaws in the mirror.

 

I pour forth from the fleshy seams,

My anxious words, thoughts and dreams

Burst into the world, liberated,

Effecting changes, exhilarated.

 

Seeping, floating, my soul follows.

Without it, the body’s shell hollows.

The essence of me, stripped bare,

Heavy with life, yet light as air.

 

I inhale; the world floods my senses.

I exhale; the flood strips my defenses.

Each nuance of life seems more sprightly,

Even dimness and darkness shine brightly.

 

Without weighty chains to shackle me,

I am one with the sky, the earth, the sea:

The hummingbird flies by quite slowly,

Every snowflake, I feel it more wholly,

 

I hear the worms move in the soft earth,

I witness the apple blossom’s birth.

I feel the clouds’ gentle caresses,

I revel in the poor man’s excesses.

 

The scent of war is dissipating,

In its place, peace is assimilating.

With nothing to blind my soul’s sight,

I absorb the sun’s rays; I am the light.

Reviews

[.]

Seeping, floating, my soul follows.
Without it, the body’s shell hollows.
The essence of me, stripped bare,
Heavy with life, yet light as air.

I inhale; the world floods my senses.
I exhale; the flood strips my defenses.
Each nuance of life seems more sprightly,
Even dimness and darkness shine brightly........these lines are really very powerful.......i liked yer way of working.

[Acer]

I felt the light.

[Acer]

I felt the light.

[Glen Yumang Manese]

You paint a vivid picture to the reader... as one reads the lines to this write... May I add by making this flow a bit better... by eliminating some of the I's and The's in the piece to give the lines more fluidity...

[N!LoC]

namaste indeed!

[lee von cleef]

A coffee mediation,rhythmic words in breath,ever expanding like a hit from a bong I had in high-school, each detail rising up to the light ,as if it was new ,birth,chinchilla baby soft.

[Lexi I.]

Haha. This is definitely a new take on, but I can see where the altered state of mind comes into play! :)

[Creepy Swine Guy]

I like this. I like it a LOT. I love the idea and save a few places where I stumbled over rhythm, the execution was very nice. I might suggest the economy of perhaps stripping the stanza that works least well for you (which I hope is not the first) for the sake of said economy.

[Lexi I.]

I thank you for your advice and for reading!

[Everett DeValle]

I truly love the couplets and the message of positivity. A wonderful write.

[Lexi I.]

I deeply appreciate your feedback!

[Everett DeValle]

You are so very welcome.

[MAC]

a deeply beautiful write!

[Lexi I.]

Thank you!

[Ahmad Cox]

Very deep and beautiful thoughts.

[Lexi I.]

Thank you for reading!

[Frieda P]

I am thoroughly jazzed by this one! Does it come with instructions pray tell? Lovely, just a super grand slam read. Much enjoyed...

[Lexi I.]

If only it came with instructions. I think part of life is writing the instructions for living in such a sense of "one with the universe" and those around us. I think few ever have all the "step-by-step" directions...

[Frieda P]

You're probably right, some are graded on a sliding scale though...