To Leave You Hanging

A Poem by A. Doyle

I claw at my cell phone like under the first layer
Is the call I’ve been waiting for…
From you,
But I can’t make out your words.

I claw deeper and harder and find you there,
Tiny enough to live inside-
I pick you up and put you in the palm of my hand
And tell you I still love you-
I say all the words that when strung together
Fill the space where silence gathered-

Words in vain, true but selfish,
Words like pain and mistake and together again,
Words like a hook to pull you in-
Thinking back on days when you used words
To turn my nerves into the keys of a piano
Your heavy fingers danced on.

Now you tell me you’ll be bigger and wrap me in your arms
But I already feel better in the arms of closure-
The heavy weight, with each word I say, dissipates
Like drops of rain on hot pavement
Leaving only the trembling from a train of confession
That’s been years in the making and is finally passing-

I set you down in this far away café
And walk out into the summer breeze,
Finally free.
I leave you, tiny and crying,
On a table that will take you years to climb down-
Just to leave you hanging
The way you did to me