What He Sees In Me

Have you ever been in a relationship where you were always wondering, what do they see in me? Well, that’s what I use to ask God all the time. So I would like to share with you what He sees in me and in you, but before I do I would like to tell with you about the fear I allowed to take control of who I was in Him. Did you know that fear is the greatest tool the enemy has to use against us to stop us from doing the will of God? I know for me it started at a very young age. Mostly due to my experiences and my surroundings, but even to this day I have allowed fear to grip the very part of me that God intends to use for His Glory. I have often wondered why we as people choose to make the choices we make. Some of us spend our lives searching for the un-searchable. Never really understanding or knowing exactly what we are searching for.

There’s this longing inside of us as if there is something on the inside screaming to get out. I remember back on the day I was watching my cat scratch intensely at the door because she wanted to get to the other side. Well, that’s how I felt within myself. It’s a strong desire that lived within me desperately trying to get to the other side. Knowing the whole time what’s on the other side of that wall I have built inside of me is Christ. I had served Him off and on for many years but this time is different. My heart is a sponge; I have been soaking up the goodness of God for years but only releasing small amounts over time.

Until recently, I never put forth the effort to release all of what God had for me. I would have day’s where I felt God’s presence so strongly and times where it felt like days or weeks would go by and I felt nothing as if all hope was gone. Feeling as if God has left me because no matter how much I wanted to do what was right in the eyes of God, there was always something holding me back. That something was fear. The fear of believing I had nothing to offer the Most High God. The fear of knowing that with all the mistakes I have made over the years that there would be people looking and saying (she has no place here). Feeling as if people who didn’t even know me somehow knew I was un-educated and not very intelligent. Knowing that I spent 30 years of my life with people looking right past me because of what I looked like. Hearing things like: You're too pretty to be so heavy, if only you could lose weight, if only you wouldn't smoke (9 years clean) if only you had your g.e.d. There was ALWAYS a IF ONLY attached to who others thought I should be. Unfortunately, that was how I always saw myself (through my failures). Always knowing how much God loved me but never believing I deserved to be loved by something as magnificent as Him.

 

In my heart all I ever wanted was to serve him. In my heart stirred a passion and fire and a yearning to stand on the mountain top screaming the name of Jesus. Telling all who could hear just how great God is. I desired all my life to serve Him in a way that made a difference to thousands of people. Whether it be in missions, evangelism, preaching teaching, or simply sharing the love that God has given me with others.

To be able to go to the youth of today and show that God is bigger than any hurt they have gone through, that there is a way to smile again, to love again, and to feel safe again. Young women or young men who themselves have been abused or neglected, or people who are hungry and poor. To be able to share the love of God with these children that they have never experienced before. To show them that there is hope and that hope is Jesus. I remember spending many years of my Christian walk doing good then walking away, doing good, then walking away. That was because I spent all of my energy comparing myself to others. Comparing what gifts I may or may not have had to theirs and feeling sorry for myself if I didn’t compare well enough. Comparing ourselves to one another is something that is taught to us from a very young age. Now, even in the body of Christ we tend to compare ourselves according to our gifting, according to what the world says we are good at, instead of who God is in us.

There are days that I find myself standing before the Lord and asking Him; Lord’ What do You see in me? As I would research His word and pray constantly God would repeatedly tell me the same answer. I SEE ME IN YOU!! I see the heart of My Son in you. I see you searching for me in all that you do. So I began to research what God sees in me through His word. I found out that in order to know what He sees in me, I have to know who I am in Him. Through those studies I have learned that I am more than a conqueror (Romans 8:37).  I can do all things through Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:13). I am an Overcomer by the blood of the Lamb and the word of my testimony (Revelation 12:11) I am a partaker of His divine nature (2 Peter 1:3-4). I am an ambassador for Christ (2 Corinthians 5:20). I am part of a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a purchased people (1 Peter 2:9). I am the righteousness of God in Jesus Christ (2 Corinthians 5:21). I am the temple of the Holy Spirit; I am not my own (1 Corinthians 6:19). I am the head and not the tail; I am above only and not beneath (Deuteronomy 28:13). I am the light of the world (Matthew 5:14).

Do you now see who God say’s that you are? We are children of the Most High God and as long as we continue to press into His word and walk by faith. Believing in who He is in us, we will always know who we are in Him. We will always see what He sees in us. So please continue to press in and fall deeper in love with your Heavenly Father. Scripture say’s:  I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward (Philippians 3:14) For God has not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, love, and a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7) Now, my favorite scripture that say's what God sees in me is in Song of Songs 4:7 You are altogether beautiful my darling, there are no imperfections in you.. The reason that is my favorite verse is not because He calls me Beautiful, but because He says that He sees no imperfection in me (or you) So, let's stop worrying about what the world sees in us, and get excited for what our Father sees in us. He knew you in advance, before the foundation of the world. So, in you He sees Beautiful, He sees imperfection, He sees Blameless... He sees His Son in You and Me.

 

 

                                                                         *Aleeza*