The girl behind the mask

about a girl who doesnt talk. THIS STORY ISN'T DONE

Both the girls and boys crowded the lawn, their loud annoying voices filled the fall air. the leaves had just started turning into the bright yellows, reds, browns and oranges, but it still had leaves reminding us that summer wasnt that long ago.the air around me felt damp and chilled me to the bone. Shivering I pulled my sweater tighter around myself. walking with my head down, trying to keep from making eye contact from my so called peers. The school itself was cold and empty looking, like it was more insane asylum. Which to be honest thats what high school basically was. My shoes squeaked against the stained old tiles. The faded blue lockers creaked open and clanged shut repeatedly. Just as soon as I get to my locker I hear the whispers.   

"That's her."                        

"Now way! Really?"               

"Yeah, you heard about her mom and dad right?"                 

"Only that her mom killed her dad and tried to kill her too"                                  

"I heard that she killed her mom."                           

"What no way! How can they let someone like her be allowed in school?"            

"Yeah she's super scary looking too. I mean she, like, never talks to anyone.”  

"wow" my knuckles were white as I tightened my grip on the locker, and heard the melt begin to crush in my grip. biting my nails into my palm to keep myself from going over to those silly, prissy girls to spill their blood. They didn’t know anything of what happened, and there they were talking about me like they knew everything. They don’t know and they never will. Taking a deep breath and releasing my death grip on the locker and grabbed what I needed for class. This is what happens when you live in a small town, where everyone knows you and your business. Walking down the hall I could hear all their thoughts and whispers, what they wanted, who they hated, but every time they think of me the see a monster. they see a killer, they see a freak. I know I shouldn't care but their words set me on edge and make me violent. The room was basically empty when I arrived, making my way up the stairs to the back I sat down in my normal spot.  When my lovely peers finally shuffled their way into class like a horde of zombies, just as the final bell rang. I pulled out an old fashioned journal with blank pages and began doodling as he clapped with his hands his beefy hand together, Mr. Watson said

"Alright my young scholars we have a new student with us today. Alright introduce yourself please."

"Hi, my name is Noah Reed." I looked up to find the most beautiful creature that I’ve ever seen in my life. At first look you'd probably  break your neck to get a second look at him. His gelled back, black hair looked as if he ran his fingers through it a lot. his tall demoner seemed like he was always in control, standing straight with shoulders back making it look like he was demanding we all listen and hang off of every word he said. even Mr. Watson felt the powerful coming off of him in waves. I could tell because he kept looking down at his feet, but at last he brought hand to his mouth and cleared his throat.

"Okay Mr. Reed please take a seat in the back nexted to Nicole Thomas." I raised my head in alarm, by me? What the hell?

“Ms.Thomas  please, umm raise hand for Mr. Reed.” I sighed and did as I was told.  He looked at me and smiled this I’m-going-to-eat-you smile. I glared at him then looked down, back to my drawing. I heard the metal legs of the chair be pulled back and a thump as he sat down.

“Hi, I’m Noah, and you are…?” he trailed off but I didn’t answer. Tapping my arm over and over, and over again till finally snapping my head to glare at him.

“What’s your name?” he asked again. Just tired of him already, I wrote it down at the corner of my drawing ‘Nicole thomas’, and when he saw it he did the strangest thing, He broke into the biggest lopsided grin that I’ve ever seen. It was like he had just won the lottery. I gave him a look then put my pointer finger to my lips making the universe sign for shhing someone. He nodded at me but he continued to look at me like I was an animal at a zoo and he was a wide-eyed child there for the first time. I turned myself back to my drawing of Mr. Watson with his back turned to us writing some quote from hamlet on the board. My focus was totally on the drawing, focusing on the shading, the curves of his face, and untold words that his body said.

“That’s really good.” The hot, humid feeling of his breath brushed against me as he whispered in to my ear. Nodding then scooting over so I was as far as I could go without actually leaving the table.

“So you like drawing huh? What else do you like?” He asked scooting closer to me. I snapped my head towards him and glared. I pointed my finger at myself then at him in an angry manner then slide it against  my throat. Hoping he got the point I returned to my drawing, adding the balding head of hair of Mr. Watson’s. Then a flash of a hand came out of nowhere and stole my pencil from me. I look over to the new kid to see him waving the pencil in my face like he was haunting me.This time I was mad, so I grabbed the only thing in my bag that could be used to threaten him, a box cutter. I held the sharp side just below his waist and held my other hand out for my pencil. Again his eyes were wide but this time it was different, he looked more shocked than frightened. I sneered at him and shook my other hand wait from him to return it back to me, but he didn’t he just smiled and came close to me again to whisper in my ear.

“What the hell is your problem? Its just a pencil, what are you some mute freak that likes to carry weapons everywhere?”  My look of hatred intensified, and his facial expression insental turned to regret. I pressed the box cutter closer against him while still holding my hand out, demanding the pencil back.

He smiles and slowly putting his hand over the box cutter, surprised I froze in place and gave him a confused but angry look. How dare he think that he has any right to talk to me that way. I could feel my body start to hum with energy, feeling my anger, setting my nerves on edge and making me feel as if I was floating. I dug the box cutter into his hand,  I held on to the handle so tight that I felt the moment it actually cut his palm and he started to bleed.  I could smell it, the strong smell of metal. He looked at me impressed, like he didn’t think I had the guts to do that, but he finally handed me back my pencil. I smirked and put the blade away. I could still smell the blood, the metal smell began to make me uneasy, so i hunted through out my bag and finally found some band aids. I threw the neon colored band aids at him, instantly catching it in his bleeding hand.

“Thanks beautiful.”  he said with a wink. I rolled my eyes and turned my back to him, continueing my drawing as the bell for the end of class sounded throughout the whole school.

**********************

The spray paint was still wet and slowly dripping down my locker when I return. I glared at the black non-original words that cover my locker along with some of my locker neighbors too. I took a breath breath and went to my locker. I pulled out a piece of plain paper, a pen and sticky tac, deciding to write my own note back.                              

 ‘listen here you bigot group of hormonal losers, I am so sick and tired of this, you heard about my family right ? Well, like mother, like daughter.’  and stuck it right on the locker not giving a damn about who saw it or what they thought. I was tired of them, thinking that just because i don’t speak out loud; doesn’t mean i can’t stand up for myself.

“Umm excuse me? Can you help me find my next class? I’m totally lost.” a small shy voice asked from behind me. I turned to find a small youngish-looking girl with platinum hair with light blue streaks all throughout her hair. Her clothes were similar to a  tween justice magazine.  Converse with tight jeans an a to big hoodie. She smile shyly holding out her schedule taking it from her hand I read 265: eco room. I smiled then wrote the way on the back with arrows. Straight, up, left, then last right, handing it back she gave me a megawatt smile.

“Thanks, I’m Darleen Reed.” she held out her hand way to excited for my taste but she was sweet so i gave a her a half smile. I grabbed her hand and wrote my name in cursive.

“Your name is so pretty! What grade are you in?” I flashed her ten finger plus one more.

“Oh cool well, thanks again Nicole maybe if we have lunch we could eat together?” I smiled loving how innocent she was, and nodded yes. If possible her huge grin got even bigger, before turning around and hurrying to her next class. There I was, left alone in the hall again. Sighing I decided to head to my next class even though i’d be fifteen minutes late. Entering the door, I saw him. The cocky new student named Noah Reed. I glared because you’d never believe where he was seated; that’s right, right nexted to my empty one. he smiled at me mischievously as i sat down.

“Ms. Thomas please try to be on time from now on.” Mrs. Lillian said like a grandma scolding her grandkids. After giving her a half smile and a nod she turned back to the white board to continue the lesson on the explanation of real and imaginary numbers.  

“Real numbers are integers, whole numbers, and natural numbers. While an imaginary number is a number that can be written as a real number multiplied by the imaginary unit.”  After that I zoned out. My head somewhere off in wonderland, but my hand moving its own. Drawing whatever it wanted.  My head felt heavy, and hazy but I could still feel my hand moving. Feeling like my body was floating, hearing only the murmurs of the voices speaking. They were so many of them. So many voices all talking at once, never stopping always trying to talk over one another.  They were getting louder and louder. Now they were shouting at me; in a worried, almost upset tone.  

“Nicole, Ms. thomas? Ms. Thomas!”  Someones hands were shaking me roughly; back and forth. My head cleared and I looked blankly at Mrs. Lillian.

“Dear are you alright?” She asked with her hand on my shoulder and a concerned look on her face. Nodding, I looked around and saw that everyone was staring at me, I looked down to see what i drew. I took a sharp breath in and held it there, refusing to let it go.  The picture was of  a  woman and a man holding hands while standing in the middle of a black river swirling around them. The river bed was covered with red poppies, white lilies and dark black sand with jagged rock scattered everywhere. I didn’t even have to see the couples face to know who they were; The breath I had been holding was finally released as were the titlewave of emotions flooded through my entire body. My grew wide and my hands began to tremble with the flashes on that night dancing through my mind, reminding me that  I was evil, that I was a monster that had to be killed. I opened my mouth as if i was going to say something then I closed it quick reminding myself that I couldn’t in front of anyone. I closed my eyes to be met with more flashes of that awful night. The blood everywhere, my parents lifeless bodies slowly becoming corpses in front of my eyes, and I remember the smell of gunpowder in the air. I dropped my pen and shot straight up, out of my seat, not caring about anyone else around me. All I knew was that I had to get out of there at that moment. I quickly shoved my notebook and pen into my bag, then continued to basically shove my teacher out of my way so I could leave. I ignored the angered cry of my teacher, refusing to look back knowing that everyone was whispering about me, knowing that everyone was thinking the same thing: When was I going to finally lose what little of my sanity that I had left?

*******************************************

My house was dark as it usually was when I got home. My home was all I had left of them, my parents I mean.  The house itself was small but It had always just been the three of us, I wasn’t even supposed to happened because the doctor had said that my mom couldn’t have any children; but here I am. The house on the outside was made out of mostly odd placed triangles and square shapes. The dark gray roofing needed to be replaced again and the outside walls needed a new coat of paint, you could tell by the way it was pealing. I knew I should have been taking take of their pride and joy but I couldn’t seem to find any motivation to do anything. They left me everything, although I’m living alone, the agency sends a child worker to check up on me from time to time just to make sure I wasn’t die. Throwing my bag on the table as I continued to listen to my deafeningly loud music coming from my ipod.

The music helped with blocking the memories of what happened that night. I ran my hands through my hair as I thought of the picture from earlier.  I didn’t understand how I drew that without me actually trying to draw it; but the oddest thing was, I was doing this more and more lately. I would zone out and then there was this picture of mom and dad doing somethings, they were doing different stuff each time but what always remained the same was the river, and the flowers in the drawing.  I felt like screaming, throwing and breaking something. All I wanted was for someone to tell me what was wrong with me. Why was I the way I was? But all I knew was that I was a monster that had killed her parents.  I was something to be destroyed.

I making myself a turkey sandwich with swiss cheese I sat at the table in total silence. Trying not to choke on my sandwich when I heard the doorbell ring, I wiped my mouth and then stood up to answer the door. I stopped short  to hear a nervous deep breath, taking a sniff of the air I smelled a mouth watering smell. I was like someone sprayed themselves with a liquid form of fall leaves and and fresh cut grass. I smiled, thinking of happy memories of fall time with my parents. I shook my head and shoulders, making my face expressionless, I answered the door to see the new guy, Noah I think his name was. When my brain registered who it was I slammed the door before the words could even leave his lips. He was quick though, putting his foot in the doorway to stop me.

“Relax I just wanted to talk to you okay?”  I gave him a look, raising my right eyebrow at him. Was he kidding? Why would I do that? Why would I want to risk his life? I shook my head, while trying to push his foot out of the doorway while failing to even move it an inch. I sighed and held out my pointer finger signaling wait one moment.  Grabbing my note pad usually only used to write grocery list, but whatever. He gave me a strange look in till he realized what I was doing

‘What do you want?’ I wrote then turned it to him so he could read it.

“To talk to you about what happened today in class.” I looked at him and just stared for a short while, not doing anything.

‘I don’t know what you mean.’  now it was his turn to raise an eyebrow and give me a questioning look.

“Yes, you do, you basically were freaked out by the picture that you drew during class, and I wanted to know why.”

‘Its none of your business.’

“Yes it is.’

‘How? You don’t even know me, and I don’t wanna get to know you, so you should just leave me alone like everyone else does.’ I scribbled furiously after which I shoved the notebook into his face, angry with him. When he gave me a look of pity, that made my blood boil, my skin itch, my back hunch inward, my mouth and eyes looking like something between a snarl and a look of murderous intent. How dare he look at me like I was some kind of abandoned pet on the side of the road! Who did he think he was?

Author's Note

THIS STORY IS YET TO BE FINISHED