Here, here and here...

W***e.

And I’m supposed to flinch.

It’s been awhile. Since I scorched my tongue. No pun intended.

And kept that feeling bottled up in me for that day. Nothing to do about it.

It’s been awhile since you were able to leave me with a feeling of half.

It’s been awhile since with a disparaging sound, with a word purposely left suspended in the air you were able to dispel me. Like a bubble. Into air.

It’s been awhile.

Since I realized. And gave up.

It’s been awhile since I’ve pretended to hate you.

It’s been awhile since you pretended to hate me.

It’s been awhile since awhile ceased to move me.

Cause once a w***e, always a w***e.

It will be soon before long. It always is. Right?

.

,

?

…

Right?

The hiss of Never.

Never.

Now.

Here, here and here they feel the same.

I hear my name said in your peculiar way.

I hear your laughter. The kind you can't help.

I hear it drown under the din of my euphoria.

I hear the dip in your voice when you know you’ve made me smile.

I step outside myself. And I go as far as I can without losing sight of myself. And I watch in silence for a bit.

The pretense of annoyance when you call, the derision at your humour, the laughter at your weirdness, the smile when you talk, the smile when you listen, the quiet when I know you know, the euphoria when something strange makes us oh so wholly beautiful, the anger when you provoke me, the hurt when you condescend me. the ache when you ignore me, the unbearable tightness when you replace me, the irrational restlessness when you let me down, the surreal calm when I’m ignoring you, the bewildering rush when it tides over.

Selling yourself short.

No. Just selling myself in real time.

Yes. Doesn’t everybody?

But watching from a distance, I find myself smiling at me.

The alert nerves, the sensitive touch, the reactive ears, I’ve never seen myself so alive.

He doesn’t love you.

…

Who said love had to have a flipside?

Who said that there had to be a dark side of a moon?

Who said that all halves had to have half nots?

Who said every story that begins has to have an ending?

You’re just waiting to run into his arms. And he knows it.

Around you, I forget. My balance. My virtues. My principles.

Around you, I guess I remember to forget. Like a place in my heart where I can always escape to.

Around you, I remember only the filter. That which when I have passed through drainers.

That which when I have separated the residue. That which is pure.

Around you, I forget you’re not perfect.

Around you, I forget to separate truth from reality.

Around you, I forget that there’s no difference.

Around you, I feel like an oyster.

*Sneer* Mocking me, and “you are my shell?”

No. No.

Not at all.

Around you, I feel like my own shell.

Around you, the ocean feels like a ride, not an end.

Around you, I forget all about time.

I forget to check my hourglass.

I forget to return before midnight.

But its too late. Its too late…

My carriage turns to pumpkin, and my coachmen to mice.

Cinderella burns to ashes,

And I turn back to into once upon a time.

Once a w***e, always a w***e.

Author's Note

....let me know what you think :)

Reviews

[Matthews Reggie]

impactful.... good job

[The Cute 1]

i like it good job