A great poem to empower young women, and also just an interesting piece contrasting human psychology. I think this points out important differences in men as well.
Nicely done. Its contrast is definitely its strongest element in my opinion. There are the people that exhibit themselves for all to see, and there are others who wish to be only seen by the people that care.
You did a great job describing what it is to self-respect compared to having none. When you describe the kind of attention, it probably the most powerful section for me.
' Your lover grabs you,
Claiming you as his property.
Mine caresses my cheek
And asks about my day. '
How delicate and near fragile example of affection, love.. either or both deserved.
You are such a fine writer, truly are. I don't know if it's your imagination that's acutely powerful or if you're immensely observant. Whichever, - you feel atmosphere, analyse scenes, then create emotional and philosophical results as shown in your poem. Plausibility at its best.
The poem's innate strength reminds me of Whitman.
The ending is especially strong (though I think 'onto' may be redundant as 'grasp' implies it already, and the line seems to read better a bit shorter.)
Posted 7 Years Ago
0 of 1 people found this review constructive.
7 Years Ago
Thank you for your review, I'll keep that in mind.
Hey there, I'm just a hopeless poet that couldn't write a decent piece to save my life, but it's my first love so I keep uploading. My poetry typically doesn't rhyme, I normally do freeverse. Other th.. more..