Alone Together

He loved her.

The smell of her hair

As it brushed against his cheek.

The taste of her lips,

As they melted across his own.

The touch of her skin,

As fragile as a rose.

No, it wasn’t love that he felt.

Not even close.

It was the way she seemed

To get inside of him,

Surround him,

Become part of him.

She was a necessity,

A way of life.

Everything seemed to blur,

The thinning of the air,

The motion of her hips,

It all seemed so close

Yet so far.

He loved her,

But he didn’t really.

He wanted to,

Because she made him feel

Alive.

Something nobody

Seemed capable of

Until now.

The way she gripped for his belt,

The way she acted so delicate,

The way she felt

Between his fingers.

It was all so much,

Too much.

He wanted more,

Needed more,

But he couldn’t have it.

He was alone,

He was always alone.

Even with her,

He was still alone.

She didn’t love him,

That was obvious to see.

She was an object,

He was her owner.

They loved each other,

But they didn’t.

Alone,

Together.

Reviews

[CMC]

This poem was very powerful, in fact it was overpowering (in the good way). I interpret it as two lovers finding each other, they truly want to love one another, but they have a void, or something missing, that they pettily fill with the others presence. It's never enough for them, and the void of anguish tells them that they don't love each other because they only yearn for the presence of the other and not the others void to fill. That made them alone with their burden, but together... so to speak. It's very powerful not to mention well-written, and I would like to know what you intended for this while writing it. :)

[Cœur]

Thank you so much for reviewing. You're so correct in your interpretation.

[CMC]

It was a pleasure.

[Relic]

I believe we can feel when something's not right. As though we are trying to fit a round peg in a square hole. We have someone, but something's missing and we know it.

This is a perfect example of that told in a great poetic way. The tone and mood are just right in this.

Great job.

[Cœur]

Thank you very much

[rowan.taylorrr]

this is amazing! this gets me so personally because it relates so much with me and others. it's a very emotional piece and i am left almost speechless after reading

[Cœur]

Thanks for reviewing

[Darling]

I cannot stop picturing these scene now and I trying to create faces on these two pair of lover. You really did a wonderful job.

[Darling]

Love the detail. You made me imagine it as I read it as if I was a voyeur in a couples intimate moment. Wonderful job and thank you so much for sharing.

[Cœur]

Thank you for reviewing.

[Darling]

It was my pleasure.

[Mr.Writer]

This is so good! The romantic, sweet emotions all came by! I felt that the boy didn't love the girl in the beginning, but as time flew by, he started to develop love for her and they became together I felt :)
Keep it up!
Well done

[Cœur]

Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[Mel Jayne]

This is a very complex poem, i liked that about it. You used repetition throughout and i thought that you used that well. I liked the part that said as fragile as a rose, i really liked that imagery, especially because both flowers and people can be bruised but they can still be beautiful.

[Cœur]

Thank you, I've been trying out some new topics since most of my work is basically the same. I'm glad you liked it.