My Early Work.

In this chapter you'll find my early works of poetry, a time where I was quite fond of rhymes and raw feeling.

My Pain.

My pain is great my pain is real,

Pain is all that I can feel;

In my heart and in my head I know for sure that I am dead.

Weeping, whining, hurting, crying

Pain filled days of sorrow

Leave behind a trail of blood

A trail I’m meant to follow.

Walls.

Trapped, Surrounded

This place is vacated

Alone in the dark

Held up by the shapes we cannot see.

Held up by the walls,

Too afraid to venture away

In fear that the walls that I’ve put here

May give way to the dreams and the nightmares they once kept at bay.

Hiding.

I’m hiding here from all the sounds

From all the lies, from all the loud annoying little voices that once spread

Throughout my mind, and in my head

And somehow I have come to find

I am not hiding from these voices

But the voices hide from me"

Or is that I’m the one hiding from me?

Black Abyss.

Finally I breathe again once the lights go out,

Finally I see again whilst demons move about

A little bit of blood spilt

For those who do not know…

This black abyss of loneliness is my newfound home.

Voices.

The voices stopped talking to me today like I was diseased,

The voices just up and left as if they weren’t a piece of me

They started to walk away,

Just sat here and watched them go.

Because the voices I have are the voices I had.

And the voice that I have is now gone.

Gasoline.

Your corrupted words burn my ears,

But you’ll never see my tears.

Rooms are shaking,

The earth is spinning

Here I lay in the fire burning.

A Wish.

I wish to be what I am not

A figure in a dream,

I wish to have what I do not

I want to go unseen.

I see the stars they’re shining,

And I’ll try on every one…

I wish to be your one and only,

But you see me as no one.

Forgotten.

Forgotten

My name is lost

I am nothing, no one

Or so it is that it seems

I remember what I was

I remember me,

I know it’s not all a dream.

My name is lost,

My sister is sorrow.

I am alone, feeling so hollow.

In a room where there is no light,

And I’m feeling so very small

There are no sounds in this tomb

My name is loneliness

I am lost

I’m haunted by a forgotten cause

I feel no pain

Nothing at all

My name is lost

I am Forgotten…

Gone With the Wind.

Lost as if you were never there

A ghost in my mind.

And yet one day I still find that you are with me

Though, in my heart…

You’ve never truly left.

And may this road,

Or path we choose

When that time comes I know that we’ll still be connected

Let us travel our paths as friends, or lovers…

As long as you’ll have me by your side

But still, I can’t stand to be far from you

Though your heart had always been right here…

Shadows.

Shadows spinning all around

Slamming me towards the ground

At Hell's Gates push me through

This is all because of you

Burning flames all around

All I see is cold ground

Nothing’s changed not even you

This is all because of you

Screaming souls and shadows

Screaming bleeding pain

Cold and pleading here I'm bleeding

In a crimson rain

Heaven-Sent.

I cry out with no reply and I can feel you by my side

I know I can’t see you there anymore

I hear your voice ring through these walls

Broken promises

Lies

Insanity that only cries

In the dark one thousand lies

Regret

Repent

No such thing as heaven-sent

All the pain it came and went

Just another dream to vent

Nightmare.

A moonless night of bloody fights,

Can’t find the light within this plight.

I know this just isn’t right,

So why waste your time on what’s not right?

Chaotic

Neurotic

It’s just plain psychotic,

Why these lies?

Defining cries,

Pleading and bleeding.

The ravens are screaming,

The secret is that you are dreaming.

Hear No Evil, See No Evil, Speak No Evil.

Why do I feel this way inside?

Why do I find myself unable to cry?

Am I broken? 

Or just a bit odd?

The signs are all here

Hearing voices seeing things

I wish I could go back

Don’t we all?

Sitting in rubber rooms building up white walls

Play Pretend.

Insanity burning me

Voices are chasing me

Vicious pictures flash before my eyes

Wicked monsters haunt me

Devils test and taunt me

I hide myself inside my head pretending that I am dead

The End.

Screaming, shrieking my ears are bleeding

You treat me like I'm not here

So that must be how I appear

Deaf to all your vicious lies

Here I'm bleeding from your cries

Deep I'm hiding

Ties are binding

Holding me to this pain

I find with every dying scream I lose the will to fight

The will to wail the will to scream

The will to finally end this dream....

As the voices blend...

The screams are dying out…

And now it is I’ve come to find… I lost my only way out.

Crawling.

Creeping through the darkness

The city sleeps in madness dreaming happy dreams

Loving joyful lives and singing happy things

I creep here through your darkness waking you from these dreams

I am the nightmares that haunt your sleeping soul

The darkest of the midnight ghouls coming in to steal your soul

creeping through the darkness

The city sleeps in madness dreaming pleasant things

But in the home you once slept within

Now lays a body pale and cold bleeding from the eyes

Creeping through the darkness deciding who the next is the next one to die

Frozen.

I feel so cold

Almost like ice

The shattered glass feels just like eyes

The frost is on the window pane staring back at me

'Shatter the glass and let me in'

Is what it sings to me?

Frozen on the floor

Cannot fight anymore

Alone.

In the corner of my mind

In the back of a darkened room

My knees pressed to my chest

And here I lay dreaming of you

This loneliness is piercing

Driving me over the edge

My heart is beating, hurting

How long until the end?

You’re everything I’ve ever dreamed

A wondrous flow of nightmarish screams

And at the end when I wake up

…I’m alone…

Hello Goodbye.

I really need to talk to you

To tell you all the things I wish and dream

A rainbow black perfect stream

Of thoughts ideas crazy things… and everything you seem to mean

And when I say that I don’t mean to be…

What I really mean is I can’t help but be me…

I keep stepping on the vein that keeps my lifeline flowing through…

And you walked away from me…

And there is no me without you…

So I don’t see why every time I become a mess…

The kind of mess I mean is self-destructive gasoline…

You turn around and pick me up

Then cradle me and hold me up

Like a child with bruised knees

And as a child I’ll be as honest as I feel…

I feel like my heart is made of pure steel!

It’s just so heavy all the time…

There is no reason…  

Nor rhyme…

All we know is how to hurt…

To love…

To cry…

I don’t want for you to say goodbye

Silence.

I’m locked in a cage

In a broken little world.

Just the torn little soul of a broken little girl.

When the lights go out at midnight

And creatures come to play…

When my darkest little fears

Are no longer kept at bay.

In silence I find sanity,

Sickly sweet and bitter.

Sanctuary for the wise,

Calamity for the distorted.

In silence I find sanity,

my own kind of world.

Locked in a cage,

A broken soul.

A broken life

A broken girl,

A broken mind…

A broken world

In silence I find a home…

Lost Innocence.

Can you see behind the mask?

And gaze upon the boy that's slowly dying,

Just simply crying himself to sleep?

Even though you can only see him smiling,

Do you look into his eyes and see the sorrow

Screaming from inside him?

Broken inside he feels so alone.

Will you lend a hand to the broken man or let him be?

To die alone without a happy thought to which he can escape.

If the latter then,

You might as well have stuck in the dagger yourself…

Can you see behind the mask?

And gaze upon the girl that's slowly dying

Too cold to shed a tear

Too afraid to go to sleep

Haunted by the day her innocence was stolen

Will you hold her close?

Let her know it wasn't her fault

And that even though she no longer loves herself

You love her more than she will ever know

Please say you will for heaven knows she needs a friend

And someone to help her put the pieces back together

Can you see behind the mask?

The hidden pain

The faked smiles and all the lies

Can you see behind the mask before another innocent child dies tonight?

Author's Note

This is poetry that I wrote when I first started out in general so forgive me if it isn't very good I wrote it when I was 10-11 years old.