It Rained that night!!

It Rained that night!!

A Story by Ariya
"

It's a short story about a girl's emotion that she undergoes while her partner is busy travelling with his friends.

"
The last day before the trip was supposed to be her day. She expected him to spend his day with her. But the first thing she heard was "Babe, can I leave early today? Have lots to do."
Her answer was obvious, "yeah, sure no problem".
Behind that "no problem" she was still hoping he would stay.
An hour passed and the only message she received was "Reached home, have things to do. Talk to you soon.".
She spent hours waiting for his 'soon'.
Finally he messaged "Packing done. Just having dinner, will be back in 5mins".
Happiness crossed her face though she was broken inside. She knew she only have an hour or so with him before he leaves for station and she was content in that too.
Those 5 minutes never passed. An hour later she received a call from him telling her how busy he got in packing last moment things and got late so was unable to message and is now at station. The only reply she could give was "It's fine".
All she wanted was to let him know how crushed she was, how much she wants him to stay and hold her. But 'it's okay' was all she could manage to say.
His train arrived and he left. The only thing she was left with was his text message "Good night babe. Love you. Bye"
She replied the same with her last hope, of having few minutes with him, dying with her. She cried her eyes out and the sky did the same.
It rained that night.

© 2017 Ariya


Author's Note

Ariya
This is my first ever try in writing.

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Gul
What a wonderful story, first ever written!
Fantastically and amazingly done..... waiting for more....

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Ariya

7 Years Ago

Thank you for showing interest. Really glad you like it.
Good story Akshi.
Her feelings were told though - not shown. It would be better if you took phrases like 'how crushed she was' and extrapolated IMHO.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Ariya

7 Years Ago

Thankyou for your suggestions, I'll keep that in mind.
Wow. I admire how to you are able to express this so well in such a short story. I relate so much with the girl's emotions. It's a nice story. I like it

Posted 7 Years Ago


Your first ever try is quite impressive Ariya. You have created such heartbreak here. I totally identify with this writing. Keep writing please.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Ariya

7 Years Ago

Thank you so much!!
Ayvid N

7 Years Ago

You are welcome!

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4 Reviews
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Added on September 21, 2017
Last Updated on September 21, 2017

Author

Ariya
Ariya

Hindu, India



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