I can't live without you

feeling of loss

I can't live without you.
how should i tell you
I can't live without you.

you don't even know my love for you
I am waiting for you.
you are my heart and soul
how should i tell you
I can't live without you

you live in my heart
but you don't know about the feelings
for you inside me.
you always make me cry

I live
i die
with you only
trust me..
I am waiting for you
you are my heart and soul..

how should you live breaking my heart
you always get woe of leaving me

my life is lonely without you
without you what should i do
I always become sad
this sadness breaking me out..
I am trying but this is not enough for me..

I can't control
I can't wait
I can't think more
I can't live without you..

Reviews

[thoughts of jade]

you don't even know my love for you
I am waiting for you.
you are my heart and soul
how should i tell you
I can't live without you

I love that... this is one great poem... I feel the emotions you put in this poem when you wrote this. I am definitely going to add this to my favorites.

[.shalynn.009.]

"how should i tell you
I can't live without you." This should end with a question mark.

"you always get woe of leaving me" I'm not sure what you meant here. Maybe it's a grammar error, but I'm not sure what you meant so I don't know how to fix it.

A lovely poem. You did seem to fluctuate between using ending punctuations and not using them, which confused me a little. You should think about being consistent with them, because even punctuation can be used to get meaning across. You also don't consistently capitalize the beginnings of sentences, which made it seem a little erratic and random, so you should think about how you want to do that, as well as capitilizing the word "I" within sentences, which I don't really see you doing at all. That, of course, could have meaning, emphasizing how unimportant the speaker feels without the subject, but you capitilize the same word in other places, ao I was a little confused. Other than that, I had nothing to nitpick at. Very sweet and sad poem. Good job.

[Loner]

Really heart felt (Akshat) it sure was a hell of a emotional punch u have given too your readers ...... good job !

[Nobody.]

I felt this way before.....now she lives with me...and I couldn't be happier. Good luck.

[~Lizzy♬]

I really thought this poem was in depth the whole way through. I couldn't get my eyes off the page until I finished it. I'm not a person that looks for grammar or spelling so, don't get me on reviewing that unless someone asks for it. Underneath the whole poem, I thought there was a beauty that was pulled through the words too.

~Lizzard~

[Short.Nerd]

Nice!

[Sarah McConnaughey]

"but you doesn't know about the feelings." "Doesn't" is a bad choice of words. "Don't" would have been better.

Other than that, it was a very nice poem. Great job. :)

[Kes]

There's some grammar problems, I think, but I really liked this. The message is still strong. I guess I like it because I can relate. Good job.

Like your other writes this is nice .. there are few grammer issues which need to be corrected and I would prefer a bit more structure ..
trust me . same words , ordered properly can make a much much stronger impact altogether , the write has that potential .

[Sweets]

this is so sweet and romantic!
Very well done :)