At the morgue

Thrilling, suspense-filled.

The mortician carefully removed his gloves as he covered the dead body he was working on. A pair of scissors clattered off the table and landed on the floor. He bent down to pick it. In the process, he spotted a pair of white legs leaving the room. He quickly stood upright and walked slowly toward the entrance of the room, scissors in hand. His heart pounded as he scanned the entire building searching for the intruder with the white legs. A lot of terrifying ideas crossed his mind but he decided not to dwell on them. At last, he found nothing and he thought perhaps he had imagined the whole thing. He walked back to the room and locked the door behind him. What he saw when he turned around made him gasp in horror. The body he had just finished working on was no longer on the table. In fact, the sheet with which he had used to cover the body now laid on the floor.

Reviews

[matrixmark]

A good piece, needs to be cleared up in a couple of places BUT if you think about this piece more and more, then it really could freak you out. What would have been good to add was things like, the look of horror on the morticians face or how his heart pounded against his chest as he went looking for the white legs.

The above are just a couple of suggestions and do in no way mock your writing. I did like the piece as I enjoy being spooked/scared and if this were to happen in real life then the person would be terrified.

Mark.

[Tony Jordan]

This sounds like a good teaser rather than a complete story but well told as far as it goes.
:)