Bladed Past

A Story by AieeJaii

The pain still haunts me, of those childhood memories. The ones that still make me cry, the ones that made me nearly take my life. The sting and pain of blades, it took forever to stop.

"Babe, you all right?" My boyfriend asked, he could always tell when something was on my mind, especially if I was upset.

"When am I ever all right..." I replied, I always say that because its so true.

"Still, tell me what's wrong," he said as he pulled me into his arms and kissed my forhead.

I started to cry, I can never control my emotions. Too much hurt, too many painful memories.

"Babe don't cry... Talk to me," He pulled me in closer as I cried on his shoulder.

"Just thinking... About when I had the depression... What I used to do..."

"Your over that now, babe don't worry. It's over," He kissed my lips for a long second.

"I know but... The memories... I'm scared... I want to do it again"

"Why would you want to do it again?" He put his hands on either side of my face.

"It's so hard... With the bipolar, my little brother who wasn't supposed to live, my parents being drug addicts, Dad in prision... Everything that didn't affect me as a child... Its affecting me so much now, its so painful..."

"I know that must be hard, but be strong okay? Think about how your life is seeing as you've been in foster care since you were little, it's a lot better than most foster kids. You've had a stable home, and you have a lot of friends and you have me." He said, looking right into my eyes.

"Its hard with the bipolar, its affecting me so much at home, I'm always flying off the handle at my foster parents, I'm always crying for no reason... It affects my school work... Its so hard to cope, but I'll keep trying..." I smiled at him, "How the hell have you put up with me? Anyone else would've left months ago"

"Because I love you, more than anything. I'd go through hell for you" He smiled back at me, so sweet and sincere.

"I love you too, more than anything, without you, who knows where I would be. You saved me from myself, multiple times. I'm so glad you're mine" I flung my arms around him, and he held my tight.

For a few moments we kiss, so softly, it was amazing. I was so tired from crying that I fell asleep in his arms, all my fears and pain washed away, for now anyway.