right bucket

Started with a simple rectangle and then drew what you see below. After studying what I had drawn for a minute I thought to myself that a classroom scene could be fun, especially if it was all cats.

Now class... as we've all learned, animals can fall into one of two buckets. The right bucket... or the wrong bucket. Snickers... in which bucket do we fall?

“The right one!”

Good....and Felix... which bucket do dogs fall in..?

(among hisses) “The wrong bucket!”

Very good. It's important to understand this class, as this is literally the cornerstone of your existence. It is this mentality, and the inherent truth in it, that allows us to prosper as one of... excuse me... the greatest domestic partner to human beings.

Chubbs, need we be latched to a leather strap like some kind of insubordinate beast in order to relieve ourselves?

“No Ms. Claw!”

That's right... and Firskie... need the combined presence of one of us in a kitchen and an unguarded pizza cause undue fear in the hearts of our those with which we share a home?

“No! AND WE BATHE OURSELVES... WE BATHE... OURSELVES! NO HOSES Ms. CLAW! NO HOSESSSSSSS!

Friskie... if you could... just... move your desk away from the catnip cabinet for me dear.... there we go.. thank you.

Now where was I... ah yes... in 4 weeks you all will be presented with the opportunity to be selected. Now the selection process is not easy... there will be competition... harsh competition And it's not just against the dogs.

Who here has ever seen a Chinchilla?

(silence)

That's what I thought....they are a right bucket animal... what about Ferret?

(silence)

I see... a wrong bucket but not any less of a threat... Class, these are other animals that... while we clearly possess the advantage.. cannot allow to get even close to the selectors, and it's my job to teach you how to do that.

You will master the head tilt.

You will master the proper inflection of the meow... low to high to higher to low.

You will know when and where to clean yourself and in front of who

You will learn to swat, pat, yawn, scratch and stretch in just the right way. Do you understand me.

“Meow!” (Class in unison)

Good. This is good.... I have a good feeling about this class... a good feeling..

Author's Note

FYI: brosef.com is a doodle blog where Aidan Tonbridge draws first, then writes whatever comes to mind after seeing what he's drawn. There is no consistent format to what he posts (could be a screenplay, dialogue, a story, etc.)

I welcome all feedback. Check out brosef.com for other posts!