The Fate of a Soldier

A short fantasy story I created about five years ago I think. A soldier fighting in an endless war with his 'gift'. What will happen when he finally learns how to use that gift?

Chapter One

War... It is a terrible thing. Most of my 'comrades' are dead. Some of them died right in front of my eyes. Their screams, their faces and the pools of blood and scattered limps still haunt me in my dreams. I am a soldier. I've only survived because of luck. I don't have any friends, I never had them. I was raised as an orphan at some military school school. I was an outsider. The only reason I'm still alive is because of my “gift”. I know magic, but it is very limited. I can only create things. You might think that is a whole lot, but the only things I excel at are creating weapons and armour. Those weapons and armour are only meant for me. If I would create a shield and give it to someone, it would just vanish like it never existed. The reason I'm still alive is because of this 'gift'. Whenever there was danger I would just create a shield instinctively. I'm a coward.

I blinked with my eye once and saw my shield getting shattered by a magic spell. I immediately created another one as I saw an enemy soldier rushing at me. I also created spikes on the shield the second before his sword hit my shield. The spikes pierced through his arm. After that I cut his head off his body with my sword. It was a miracle that I hadn't accidentally hit his armour. Although I was raised a soldier from when I was a baby, my combat skills were awful. I still couldn't handle a sword or any other weapon, besides shields. I'm good at defending myself from attacks. I once tried shielding others from attacks like a noble knight, but it only resulted in seeing them die right in front of my eyes. I survived and endured battles. Nothing more, nothing less. I saw a spellcaster preparing a long and terrifying spell of death and I him focussing on me. Before I knew what I was doing I had thrown my sword towards the spellcaster like some kind of spear. The sword pierced him. It had killed him. I had actually killed someone skilfully. Surprised at their loss, the enemy started losing confidence. The reason for this was because spellcasters are rare these days and often the spellcasters decided which side would win. All the enemy spellcasters were now no more. Our side had only one left, but it was enough to turn the tide of the battle towards our favour even though she was wounded. After another several hours full of blood and despair, the battle was finally over. I had survived another battle. Although we had won, the situation was grim. Many had died, most of the remaining soldiers were wounded and this war was far from over.

“Ah, Double C, you're once again still alive. Unharmed this time as well. Good. Go get something to eat and then rest a little bit. After that help us move the dead and burn them.” A man covered with blood said.

“Yes, commander.” That's my commander. His tactics are great and we always manage to escape death because of him, but with these mass-like battles in the open field, most tactics don't work. In contrary to me, the commander is a very good soldier. He's tall, smart, excels at fighting perfect with many different weapons and has the respect of every soldier that he commands. I went back to the base. People at the base all looked disappointed when they saw that I was back and not the ones they had been hoping to see. Despite that, everyone still greeted me, but they all called me 'Double C' which stands for double coward. I ate something, but only just a little because I had just seen hell once again and survived it. The image of blood in my head prevented me from eating properly. I got some sleep and went back to where the battle had been, helping with cleaning up the corpses.

I didn't know why I was still alive. I had no reason to live, except for living as a soldier. Still I didn't want to die. No, that's not true. I'm afraid of dying. I'm afraid of living AND of dying. That's why people call me Double C. Also, my first name is Cedric and my last is Cornwall. Cedric Cornwall, CC, Double C. Because of my name I don't mind that people call me that way. I see it like they are calling my by my name instead that they are calling me a coward.

The cleaning of the corpses took several days. After we had finished we marched towards our next destination. Towards the next hell.

“Why do you think you killed that spellcaster?” The commander asked. He had heard from the other soldiers how I had killed the last spellcaster in the last battle. Wanting to find out if we could improve my usefulness he had taken me apart. It was the commander that was the only one who looked out after me and actually seemed to care about me. Although he acted like this towards every one of his soldiers.

“I don't know Sir. I guess dumb luck.” I answered plainly, not wanting to disappoint the commander, but afraid to find out if I truly could improve in battle. I wasn't keen on learning how to better kill my opponents. I had seen enough blood in my eyes.

“Mmm... Maybe. Anyway, I set up some targets at the trees. I want you to try and hit them by throwing weapons. Sword, daggers, spears, whatever you feel like.” I nodded. I first created a dagger and threw at the nearest target. It hit, but just barely. Then I created a sword and threw it at the second target. This one was closer to the centre, but still not close enough. The same improvement with a spear, but I still wasn't satisfied.

“Good, now try the last target, the target which is the furthest away.” I nodded once again. Then a thought crossed my mind. Instead of creating a throwing weapon, I created a bow and an arrow. I focussed on the target and shot the arrow at it. It hit the target in the centre, bulls-eye. Ignoring the compliments of the commander I created another arrow and shot it at a bird I had seen in a tree, about 40 to 45 feet away. The arrow hit its target. Then I tried shooting at a bird flying in the sky. Once again the arrow hit its target. The commander looked at me in amazement as I let the bow disappear.

“I think you finally found at what you excel at. No, you found out what you are. You're not a swordsman, you're an archer. Why hadn't we thought of trying this before? Mmm...” The commander seemed lost in thought. After a while he continued. “Tell me, how far can you shoot and still hit your target?” The commander asked with a curious voice. He sounded more excited about it than me. I didn't really feel anything at this discovery. A shiver ran over my spine as I thought about the dead bodies of last battle again.

“I don't know. I just found out that I'm good at this. Maybe we can find out together?” I asked the commander, because he was excited about this. I actually wanted to quit and fall in dreamless sleep which hadn't happened much lately. I was more tired each day and wondered when I would collapse of sleep deprivation.

“Yes, I think we should. Well then, how far can you see?”

“Quite far away if I improve my eye-sight with magic.”

“You can do that?” I nodded. “Well, I know it is far away, but can you see the flag that is raised in the middle of our base?” I nodded again. “You can?! Mmm... Then try shooting an arrow through the centre of the flag.” I looked at the direction of the base and improved my eyesight. I now could see the whole base as I was searching for the flag. Once I found the flag I improved my eyesight even more. I focussed my aim at the centre. I had already created the bow and an arrow. I calculated the effect of the wind, adjusted my aim and released the arrow form my grip. A normal person shouldn't be able to shoot an arrow and let it land on a target that was that far away, but I wasn't a normal person and the bow I held and the arrow I shot weren't normal as well. They were made out of magic and I had automatically, without realising it, adjusted both the arrow and the bow so that I would have hit my target. Also, my strength alone didn't give the arrow the force it needed, therefore magical power had been added. I suddenly realised this all. It all felt so natural for me to do. It felt like I had found out where to use my magic for and what I really was. I was an archer like my commander had said to me. I was an archer which could hit a target with precise aim even if it was a kilometre away.

Suddenly the alarm sounded at the base. It was the alarm for an enemy attack. We rushed towards the base, jumping on the horses we had ridden to this practise area. When we arrived at the base, which was actually just a lot of tents in one place, one of the guards told us one of our flags had been pierced by an arrow. People thought it had come from our direction. For some reason the commander started laughing and explained the situation. After that he once again looked at me in amazement and padded my shoulder and started laughing again.

“The next battle you will stay in the back. From now on you're going to kill spellcasters and the highest rank soldiers. Maybe in the next few battle you'll go from Zero to Hero.” The commander smiled at me. I was happy. It was one of the few occasions in my life that I felt the emotion of joy. Still a question kept creeping around in my mind. “Should you be happy about killing people?”

Chapter two

War... It still is a terrible thing. Even if you're safe yourself and you are a hero in the eyes of other people, you still carry a heavy burden. It is not responsibility. I don't know that feeling. No, it's the knowledge that every battle you will rob the lives of many people, that the faces of both your comrades and your enemy haunt you every night and it's the fact that after every battle you lose a part of yourself. After every battle you lose a bit of your sanity. After every arrow I release from my grip, I come closer to insanity. Even though the flames of hell don't reach that close to me anymore as before, I am still living inside a hell. Two years have passed since I found out what I really was. In that time I have indeed gone from a zero to a hero. In that time I have changed and I'm not afraid of others anymore. No, they don't frighten me anymore. The one I'm afraid of... is me. Killing has become a routine for me, a normal thing. Two years ago I was dreaming every day of a nice peaceful life away from death and all the killing. Nowadays I can't even imagine a life without killing.

“You seem deep in thought a lot lately. Something the matter? Feeling gloomy you haven't fall in love yet?” The voice of a girl said. Well, she wasn't a girl anymore, but she wasn't a woman as well. She looked like a lady sometimes, but her voice was that of a girl and she acted like one most of the time. Her name is Alex. She is the one thing that made sure that I haven't drowned in my own insanity. The thing is, she herself doesn't know this.

“Nah, it's a bit more serious than that.” I responded.

“What's more serious than love?”

“This situation we're in. The fact that I can't imagine a day where I'm not killing people. That I can't imagine myself living in peace...”

“Ouch, that IS serious. Don't get all depressed on me. Once this war is over you're going to get yourself a nice fair lady, fall in love with her and live happily ever after.”

“Sounds like a nice fairy tale. It would be even better if you were in it as well.”

“Are you hit...” She was interrupted by the sound of a big explosion near us. “Ah, they're sending those lang range random bomb-spells on us again. Gotta go. Need to send those spells back at them before they kill too many of your people.”

“Good luck. I'll be supporting you from the rear.” She didn't hear that. She was already too far away. Alex was one of our spellcasters. She had been battling with our forces two years ago as well, but I didn't know her back then. I first met her the first battle I was fighting as an archer and not as a swordsman.

Another blast took me back to reality. A magic spell was flying right at me, but I bounced it back in the direction where it had come from and I quickly killed the spellcaster which had cast it with a single shot. My magic power had increased ever since I had specialised in fighting with a bow and an arrow. I could now send back enemy spells, shoot multiple arrows at the same time and add a special effect to an arrow, but I couldn't shoot multiple arrows and add effects on them at the same time. The effect I could put on the arrow could differ. I could add an element, like fire or ice, to it or some kind of an explosive spell. After killing that spellcaster I started to search and eliminate all the spellcasters one by one. This took quit some time this time since it was truly a large-scale battle. After that I aimed my arrows at the commanding officers. I sometimes would help the soldiers on our side whenever at some location there were heavy losses, but my main priority were first the spellcasters, than the commanding officers and at last the 'ordinary' soldiers. However, whenever I sensed that Alex was in life-threatening danger, I would immediately help her. Somehow, I could sense if she was wounded or that she was really in trouble. She was the only person where I could do this. I did this unconsciously. I would help her despite of the situation I was at that time.

Apparently I was feared among the enemy. They had tried to find and kill me many times. IF they managed to find me and focus their attention on me, they would lose their concentration on our spellcasters, which would lead to a situation where our spellcasters could kill them easily. I could easily survive until the enemy spellcasters would be killed, because if a spellcasters doesn't pay attention to his or her own safety, he or she will be killed instantly by the enemy. However, if they didn't do this and focus on battling our spellcasters I would find and kill them one by one. Soldiers needed to kill all of our soldiers before they could come close enough to kill me and enemy archers couldn't shoot as far as I could. Besides, archers were a great prey for spellcasters, so normally it was rare to see archers on the battlefield. So you would say that it was easy to spot me. Well, I would if I didn't look any of the other soldiers surrounding me, but I looked exactly like them. I was always in the rear, but looked like any other soldier. Besides, before each battle began I had the same weapons as the soldiers surrounding me. I created the bow and the arrows at the start of each battle.

So yeah, we've won every battle the last two years. Looks like this war is almost over, don't you think? Well, it's the opposite. The side I'm siding on is a little country. We have a limited amount of soldiers and our supplies are limited too. Our enemy is like a huge empire with what seems to be an unlimited amount of both soldiers and supplies. Their numbers of loss are greater than our numbers of loss after every battle, but if you look at the big picture it lies differently. For example, if you look at their whole force and our whole force they lose 0,1 percent after every battle and we lose 2 percent after every battle. You do the maths. Their motto is: 'We'll win this war eventually.' Our motto is: 'We fight for freedom'. Yes, I'm fighting for something I never had. Freedom... I never knew that. Born and raised as a soldier. Never could do the things I wanted to do...

Let's go back to the main point. It looks like we'll eventually lose, but after every battle we gain allies that make up our losses. So the power balance changes after every battle just a little. All and all it makes this war seem like a never ending war...

After hours of battle the battle is finally over. The enemy has surrendered. The soldiers are given two choices. The first, you join us. The second, you die. We show no mercy. In the beginning we took in prisoners, but later on we found out that those prisoners eat too much of our food supplies. So, we can't afford to show mercy anymore.

How I know these things you ask? The commander and Alex told me about them. My education as a soldier had been lacking and they have been my teachers for some time now. At first the commander was my only teacher, but later on Alex became my teacher as well as she found out the commander was teaching me things which were common knowledge for most people.

“Good job.” The commander said. This time only his sword was covered with blood.

“Did they join us?” I asked, curious about the fate of the remaining soldiers.

“Most of them did. God, I hate those executions. It's like a slaughter.” Instead of cleaning his sword of the blood, he let it on for a little longer. He wanted to remember what he had done, even though it hurt him.

“You could order your men to do that work instead.” I suggested.

“Yeah, I know, but a good commander shares the pain of his soldiers.” We both said at the same time.

“Still, I'm glad that you don't order me to kill those men. I don't need any more nightmares.” I said, my voice still serious.

“Ah, those get less worse.”

“No, they don't. You just get used to them and having them.”

“Well, that's part of the war too Cedric. Well, gotta go. Your angel is arriving and I don't want to disturb your private time together.” The commander was grinning. He knew of my feelings towards her. He started calling me by my front name after he found out. He likes to tease me with it and I can't say anything back because Alex is always in hearing range at the end of his last sentence. His timing is always perfect.

“Yo. What were you guys talking about?” Alex asked me with a smile on her face. For some reason the war didn't get to her like me. She didn't like to be all depressed the whole time and wanted to enjoy life, not waste it with negative thoughts. That's what she always says.

“Depressing stuff. Let's talk about something else. What's for supper?” I asked.

“Well, THAT'S a depressing subject. It's stew again. I can't eat stew anymore.” She made a sour face. Her positivity was changing now that we were talking about the same food.

“We gotta keep our strength up.” I answered to her. I agreed with her, but need we needed the food.

“I know, but can't they just put some other herbs or spices in it from time to time? It always tastes the same.” She kept on complaining for a while before her smile returned.

Well, that's an average day for me. Some days we are marching towards our next destination and our next battle, but more variety than that we don't get. This Endless War continues day after day, week after week, month after month.

Chapter Three

Death surrounding me. It has been some time since we were on the losing side. Soldiers around me are getting killed. Soldiers of both sides. The army of the enemy is just too big. Each soldier of us has to kill one-hundred of them! I am retreating, dodging blades, spears and spells along the way, trying to kill as many as I can while I am jumping at inhuman speed. It is not my life I fear. I have long accepted the fact that I will die on the battlefield. No, I'm hurrying towards the point Alex and the commander are fighting. Their lives are in danger and I'll gladly give up this life of mine in order to protect them. This is the final battle of the Endless War. Every available soldier from both sides are gathered here. Whoever wins here, wins the war. The only problem for us is, the fact that we're losing. We are getting pummelled into the ground. I keep hurrying towards her, towards my angel, towards the one I love.

“What the hell are you doing here?” That is the first thing the commander shouts. Before I answer his question I quickly put him, and myself, out of danger.

“Disobeying orders Sir. I'm here to protect the lives of both you and Alex. We can't afford to lose any more commanding officers nor any spellcasters. The ones that were surrounding me are dead.”

“You'll be hanged if we get out of here alive. Still, I'm glad you came.” Having the permission of my commander I hurry towards Alex. I immediately help her fight the spellcasters she is fighting. I bounce back spell after spell while trying to get a lock-on on any enemy spellcasters at the same time. Alex was near her limit. She hadn't noticed my arrival at all, which was a really bad thing. I finally confront all five spellcasters who were overwhelming us.

“Razor Shot! Fire Shot! Lightning Arrow!” Firing three enchanted arrows after each other I instantly took out three spellcasters as well as all the soldiers that where near the spellcasters within a range of thirty feet. I wasn't holding back anymore. Stealth had always been the most important thing in my previous battles, but that didn't matter anymore. If all the spellcasters would suddenly switch their attention to me, I wouldn't care. I will show them them all what I really can do!

“Holy Arrow! Dark Abyss!” I shot my most powerful spells/arrows at the last two spellcasters who were slowly killing Alex. Every man who was in the path of these two arrows, allie or foe, would meet instant death. There was already so much blood on my hands, I didn't care how many more people had to die. The only thing that mattered to me was that SHE had to keep living. She had to survive, the rest didn't matter. At that moment I lost my sanity at my own free will. I became Death itself. Each arrow I shot was a like a living raging typhoon, destroying everything in its path. An insane laugh that I didn't recognise was coming out of my mouth. I first killed ten people with one arrow, the second pierced one-hundred, the next one a thousand. There was no stopping me. I had lost sight of everything that was around me.

Hours passed and after a long time my body couldn't take anymore. Darkness took over me and I felt like I was drowning. And then there was nothing.

A voice was calling me. A familiar voice. It sounded both close by and far away. I chased the voice, trying to grasp it as I was slowly returning to the land of the living. I opened my eyes. I tried to move, but found out that I almost couldn't. I could only move my head. When I looked at my body, I saw that there were chains around both my arms and legs. My mind was empty and I tried to remember what had happened. A girl walked into the room. There was a smile of her face, but there was a deep sadness in her eyes.

“Hello Cedric. How are you doing?”As soon as I heard her voice, I knew who she was.

“Hello Alex. What happened? My head hurts...” I now was trying hard to remember everything. I dug into my memory.

“How much can you remember?”

“I...” At first I found nothing, but then images appeared in front of my minds eye. All came back to me. The last battle of the Endless War. The moment I lost my sanity and the madness that had followed it. Tears were streaming over my face.

“Yes... That's true... I remember. I casted away my sanity. I had become death itself.” I said after the tears were away with a calm voice.

“We won, you know. Victory was ours. Because of you the war is finally over.” She started crying. “You k-k-killed everyone. It was a massacre. Nobody could stop you or get even close to you. I tried to, but I couldn't. You were terrifying Cedric. I had never seen you like that before.”

“I'm sorry.” A silence came over us as she kept crying. “So that's what these chains are for. What's going to happen to me?”

“We won this war because of you, but you destroyed both armies. Only the small group that was standing behind you didn't get killed. You are both a hero and a monster...” There was a pause. “You'll probably get hanged.”

“I see. So this hell is finally going to end, eh? Good. I was getting tired of it. I did what I had to do.” I didn't say a thing for a while. “Can you do me a favour?” I then asked. She nodded, being unable to speak. “Good. Can you keep on living and become happy? I want you to obtain the one thing I couldn't obtain. Find happiness. Live you life for the both of us.”

“Why me?” Was the only thing she could ask.

“Because you are the one I fell in love with. You were the one that kept me from losing my sanity any sooner. You're the one who I wanted to live with for the rest of my life. You were the reason I kept on living.”

She didn't say anything. She couldn't take it anymore and ran away. I never saw her again after that. My trial was the day after that. As Alex had said they were planning to hang me. The only thing they asked me was whether I regretted what I had done. I just answered that I didn't and that I just wanted to protect the person that was most precious to me. That I had embraced madness for that purpose.

Well, tomorrow I will get hanged. I don't know yet what I will do. Will I embrace my death or will I escape and live my life as a fugitive? Whoever finds this diary, this book, tell everyone the horror of war. Tell them to live in peace. Tell them, of my life.

Author's Note

I skimmed through it to correct some things, but maybe I missed some things. Help me out on this guys. Could you also give your honest opinion on what you think of the story and what you would do how to improve this story.