Things just stepped up a notch

Chapter 4 of Wish upon a Star

Every day for the next several weeks Star and I spent as much time as we were able to on either instant messengers or video chat with the conversation ranging from small talk about our days to the deeper more complex aspects of service and the mindset of a slave.

A few times there were some topics brought up that she seemed quite uncomfortable with the idea of, such as at times her Master would wish her to be naked throughput the day. Of course after having lived a completely vanilla lifestyle in a Christian household so wandering around in the nude was something that you just didn't really do.

Despite that though, her enthusiasm never once waned and became very infectious. Sure. I was enjoying just spending time with this girl, but as the days and weeks went on, I began to feel an excitement about the whole thing that wasn't something I had felt since … Well, since I was with my first girlfriend all those years ago and discovering sex and all the joys that went with it. That buzz of excitement of entering into a new phase of my life.

This was no different. Yes I had been with submissives before and yes they were exciting to be with but the excitement paled compared to what I was feeling now.

I began to look forward to our conversations. They quickly became the highlight of my days. So much so that my job started to become an irritating diversion, there solely to interrupt my time with her.

The time difference was also a bit of an irritation, but I slowly found myself acclimatising myself to US time. the late nights became less of a drain. Eventually I ended up living completely on US time. Awake all night spending it talking t and training Star and then going to work and sleeping for a few hours before doing it all over again.

I really don't know at what point it happened, but somewhere during all of this, I began to go from simply liking this girl and wanting to train her to starting to develop feelings for her.

Of course by the time I had actually realised this it was far too late. While it was really a wonderful feeling. There was a big part of me that was screaming at myself “She's on the other side of the world! You must be crazy!”

On one other occasion I had fallen in love, or, what I thought was love over the internet. It had been a number of years ago when I was in my 20's and much more naive and BOY was it a painful experience. Not because it went badly. Far from it. It became unbearably hard to never be able to be with them. To just do simple things like holding hands or giving a hug or even the stupid things like gazing into their eyes in the mornings over a cup of coffee and just knowing what they were thinking. You know. The little things that make a relationship special. Was I really willing to go through all of that with Star? Not being able to pat her on the head and tell her she was a good girl? Not being able to have the joys of looking into her eyes and giving her that smile of mine that gives that sense of “well done”. Not being able to cuddle or hug her.

For about A month I fought with these feelings.. Trying not to let them show and trying the impossible task of trying not to allow it to affect my training of her. I still to this day don't know if I was successful or not. Eventually though. My mind throbbed with the conflict of logic versus emotion.

Eventually the emotion did win and I decided the old adage of “nothing ventured nothing gained” seemed like as good an excuse as any to set my heart free. Of course my brain immediately backed that one up with several more justifications such as: “love will make you more effective as a master as you will truly always strive to do the best for her instead of just enough to do the job” and “This girl deserves to have all of you, after ll, that is what she is giving to you isn't it?”

So once I released the bounds on my heart and really began to settle in and enjoy the whole experience, she began to shine even brighter in my eyes. And I am almost certain she saw the change in me as well and it seemed to bring out even more of the best of her. I didn’t;t think that was possible. She seemed so perfect any way.. sure. She was still green as far as her slavery went, but nothing that training wouldn't fix.

And there was also a little part of me who although uncertain, felt as though she might be experiencing the same things in herself.

One night during the usual training and conversation, I asked her.

“Star. Do you think that love improves how a slave serves? Their devotion to their master etc.”

There was a pause in her reply.

I had mentioned the “L” word. Was she going to freak out? Was she going to declare her undying feelings? Every nerve stood on end in my body and the hairs prickled on the back of my head as I waited the few seconds for her reply. A few seconds which felt like an eternity.

Seems as good a place as any for a cliff hanger. Let me know what you think.