In the silence

Funny how many things stay hidden�in the silence.

the black thorns sank into my flesh…

and pain exploded inside me.

 

I lay

 

on the cold pedestal in blood

dripped from my skin.

 

Shivers spread   

as my stifled screams echo trough the tunnels…

 

 

 

Black deep tunnels…  

with long cold whispers…

 

 

 

She raises from my marble case again.

 

Pink eyes glimmer, with evil, as she laughs …

 

my laugh

 

as she stains

my body

 

as she strangles

my dreams

 

becoming once again

 

me.     

 

Author's Note

Often we become what we are not.

Reviews

[Trée]

Adela, one word comes to mind--bold. I like the economy of language, but not just the economy but the careful selection of strong verbs and vivid adjectives and a pacing that slaps one up side the head and then back down again. This poem, this vision, your words, here, now, attack the reader with passion and depth and a rawness that makes one want to strip the veneer from our bodies and swim in the lake of eternal authenticity. In other words, I liked this poem very, very much. :-)

[Zatoichi]

Not are we
what become we
often - - read backwards to discover source- word games are fun-

poetry is everywhere
thanks for your contribution
my skin feels raw when i read your words

[Debra Stevens Edwards (..]

This is like reading a classic case of " We are our own worst enemies ". It is well written and intense. I think we all have felt like this at times. Excellent read.
Debby

[Daisy]

cool way you have written the words here. adds to the writing and made me think as I was reading it. you are so right! x

[SilentDream]

Chilling and visual. This thought lingered for me:

Shivers spread
as my stifled screams echo trough the tunnels�

Silence blends seamlessly with darkness in this piece.
So nicely done!

((Hugs and LOve)) ~SilentDream

[Ms Jessica Renee]

Yes we often become who we are not and you made that perfect clear with such a raw emotion. The words have such a power behind them and I love the structure you went with in this poem. It was a marvelous write, bravo my dear.

[Thomas James Martin]

I hope that I never have a nightmare as vivid as this or as bloodcurdling.
Tom

[Poeticpiers]

profoundly disturbing nightmare scenario M'Lady Well written and presented

[Michelle Anselm]

*shivers* This sounds like a horrible nightmare, to me. I hope I never have it. But a powerful composition nonetheless. My favorite section:

"Pink eyes glimmer, with evil, as she laughs �
my laugh

as she stains
my body

as she strangles
my dreams"