Deadly Illusion

Throw your gaze to the wind.

Let there be no confusion.

My mad heart still can't take,

Love, The deadly illusion!

 

This death needs calm waters,

To rest its madness within,

My heart! A wounded sea,

The most infectious lesion.

 

Let wind soothe your beauty,

Your tears will find some solace.

As they burn both our hearts,

Weeping down your lilac face.

 

Don't deem this heartlessness,

A hurt rose fond of mourning,

There's an apocalypse,

'Neath every silent warning.

 

A man you seek, fine lady.

An ocean to hold your seas,

A place where all your seeds,

Will bloom into fruitful trees.

 

I can see the cluster,

Within your diamond eyes,

I feel your warm pulse,

Flaming my cherry-red prize

 

But now my waves are mad,

My wallow is rather deep

First dancing hurricanes,

Then on a disaster we’ll weep.

Author's Note

This was inspired by Sye, Noodlehead.

Reviews

[Ohhhwillow]

Ahhhhh this is a refreshing write! From first stanza to last it it full of passion - and the boldness of your word choice is where you show it best. Your rhyming is sporadic which I like, as it is more tender and less so a children's rhym as couplets and such often sound! Some parts I had to reiterate to grasp the flow, but then nothing is ever read the same way twice so it's not a huge issue. :) "I can see the cluster within your diamonds eyes", I love this imagery in particularly. It reminds me of something I'd have written myself heehee. Keep up the good writing Adam, :)

[Adam Lebzo -RonninWarrior-]

Thank you for your outstanding review, Willow
I am much glad you liked it.

[Paige]

Finally back on the site and this is one of the first I read. Seems like a different approach for what I've read from you. Amazing range you take on. Very nicely done

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Love, The deadly illusion!

This single line says a lot. I love the entire piece, need I say more? :)

[Adam Lebzo -RonninWarrior-]

Thank you, Blue.
I am humbled.

[David Lewis Paget]

A very interesting write from you, Adam. Your command of the language - which is your second language - is quite remarkable. You seem to be coming ahead in leaps and bounds. Great stuff!

(But should that be 'diamond' eyes?)

[Adam Lebzo -RonninWarrior-]

Your comment and testimony have made my day, David.
Thank you very much.
And yes, it is. I will correct it immediately.
Thanks for pointing it out.

[Baby Ricochet]

Reads all classical and s**t. All I know is gangsta rap

[Adam Lebzo -RonninWarrior-]

But is that a good reason to insult other writings?

[Rebecca Buller]

First dancing hurricanes,
Then on a disaster we'll weep

A very beautiful piece and actually the first of your work that I've read. I will have to stop by and read more. Well done!

[Adam Lebzo -RonninWarrior-]

I am honored.
Please do so.

[Tarry Franck]

Love the imagery - job well done - Bravo

[Adam Lebzo -RonninWarrior-]

Thank you, Tarry.
I am much humbled.

[Tarry Franck]

My pleasure

[Leslie Philibert]

Well written quatrains and good rhymes, solid work !

[Adam Lebzo -RonninWarrior-]

Thank you, Leslie.
I am much humbled.

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

I'm left with the impression of a wolf in sheep's clothing or a caliginous cloud warning of a storm about to come. There's a dark danger here that lurks beneath the surface about to come ashore like a tsunami.

[Adam Lebzo -RonninWarrior-]

you cannot simply imprison the imagination of a reader and a poem can have millions of interpretations. I agree with the last part. However, he is not a wolf I reckon. I think he is pushing her away, maybe because her love is too powerful for him in his current state. Maybe he needs more time to rest his waves and learn how to love again.

[kublakhan27]

She is the youngest muse I've ever met; I'm not surprised to know that she inspired such an ambitious piece. I know how a mad heart feels, and I love your description of it. I could go on but I'd only be quoting the entire piece. I'll just say it was an obvious pick for my library. Great piece.

[Adam Lebzo -RonninWarrior-]

She is indeed.
Thank you, I am much humbled.

[Julianne]

this is beautifully written. you've done a great job here.

[Adam Lebzo -RonninWarrior-]

Thank you.
I am much glad you liked it.

[Julianne]

you're very welcome/