The Never Ending Melancholy

A story about choices we make make in life, moments past and the ones ahead of us.

A somewhat quiet rain, and slow. Pouring over the casket and people beside it.

In great grieve, a boy, high school age, holding his dear mother filled with heavy tears, and pain in her eyes, in her heart.

The boy, idle standing with her. Others believing he is in shock, well, how could a boy his age even react in his age. It was a situation he wasn't prepared for.

The sky kept weeping for the lost man.  But as the time passed, the people went, and the sky starting to clear. A familiar man walking towards them, with somehow strange sad face, taping the boy on the shoulder and extending his arm, and in his arm a letter.

The boy and the mother confused. And looking at the gentleman, but the man expected that face.

'' Unfortunately it's time to give this to you '' said the man looking at the letter.

The boy just standing, not able even ask ''what is it?'', the voice wouldn't come out, the strength just wasn't there. The mother had a feeling what it was, but the time for explanation just wasn't there.

Driving to home, all kinds of memories just showing into his mind, frustrating and heavy.

Slowly walking out of his car and into the house, towards his room. Without strength just lying on the bet. His face covered with his right hand. Memories, moments with him, just wouldn't stop showing. It was torture and salvation at the same time.  The reality was too brutal to accept.

Finally a tear, down the cheeks, one after the other, without a sound. He remembered the letter and slowly getting up to opened it. To remove the sad flashbacks for a minute, it will be good, he thought.

When he opened it a face of disbelief and shock came to him. The tears came again. The pain was unbearable.

 

The letter:

 

 

Years come by, happy and sad moments. Nostalgic moments, so dear to us, unlike today they were better, time that has gone, forever, in far darkness, unable to return.

Moments regretful, our present crushed, and not fulfilled as though they could have been, always a question wondering in our hearts, ''what if?''

There also some of hope, or to be honest they are the ones that keep us together, dreaming and preparing for the better moments, because the ones we have now are not so bright as we hoped before, hoping, but not doing something about the future. Are we going in a circle?

And there also worrisome moments. Moments in which we have all the three above combined. We worry whether the future will be bad or not, so we wouldn't feel nostalgia for this day we have now. We worry that we will regret for doing nothing to make our goal fulfilled, and see our last hope crumbled and destroyed.

But I think we need these feelings and these moments, I may be wrong but aren't they what forms us, humans?

As my journey continues, so should yours, never falling down.

You should cherish the past and so more if the past was filled with happy moments, so feel nostalgic. There is nothing wrong with that. It makes you stronger.

Regretting makes you recognize your mistakes, and such is necessary for a boy to turn into a man. So don't avoid it.

Hope, see in to the future, see into the sky, dream all you want, that is the right of every human, it comes naturally, and by knowing your mistakes you will find a way to turn that dream into reality.

And finally, worry. Whether you want it or not it will be with you for the rest of your life. Thanks to it, you will be alert, when the time comes to defend your dreams, your choices, your very being.

I may be gone but it's not the end. It actually never ends. But that's something you should see for yourself.

There should be no more words trying to describe the way I feel. 

Proud in every step you make.

Never changing.

After all, you are my son.

 

 

Hurting but calm, he opened the door and went downstairs, to his mother.

She was sitting on the chair in the living room, staring at the wall. Into the wall with pictures, pictures with his father. Behind her back, he hugged her, and said.

'' Mom, I am hurting, and so are you. And maybe it will never disappear, but we will get through this. Appreciating the moments that were, and get ready for the upcoming times, times that will ease this pain.  ''

The mother looking into his eyes, she smiled.

Realizing it does not end here.

Actually, it never ends.