A View to a Kill*

A Story by Abishai100

Red Sparrow is an NSA/USA agent intercepting a blood diamond piracy in Switzerland and must snowboard his way to drywalls.

One more heist story my good friends/readers, but this is a James Bond fanfiction. Who doesn't appreciate the evil likes of Max Zorin and Dr. No, eh?

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Red Sparrow is a masked intelligence agent for the NSA/USA intercepting a diamond heist in Switzerland orchestrated by a mastermind immersed in the nefarious blood diamond matrix. He's to intercept the terrorist theft of these diamonds before the terrorists arrive. Red Sparrow is determined to prove himself as the right dancer.

RED SPARROW: I'll be using a special toy rifle for this diamond interception heist of the Swiss bank!

Of course, the Swiss have always been politically neutral and avoid such terrorist problems and scandals and are eager for the NSA/USA to intercede on any blood diamond warlord scheme and hope to report positive world banking news in their digital papers.

RED SPARROW: I'm taking time to do some recreational snowboarding, which always reminds me of heaven!

Our valiant spy's met a gorgeous young woman but this dark gal may be a part of the terrorist scheme, but Sparrow isn't concerned with that temporarily.

DR. NO: It was I who ordered the stealing of those Swiss bank diamonds, you idiot!

RED SPARROW: I knew I'd find the mastermind behind this blood diamond mess, No.

DR. NO: The right press scandal generates the tone of the blood diamond war, Sparrow.

RED SPARROW: I'll get there before your evil minions, No.

DR. NO: You won't stop us, Red Sparrow.

RED SPARROW: Why's that, No?

DR. NO: We're...everywhere.

Fortuantely, Sparrow invaded the Swiss bank on a Saturday with his red toy gun and explained it was filled with poison and that he's to take the No diamonds to be injected into the blood diamond nexus in Belgium to prevent a continental gem swipe. He switches the $20 million gems for fake ones for No's terrorists to steal the next week and inserts a spy-cam inside the vault to get photos of the minions for the NSA!

DR. NO: This Red Sparrow is a greater pirate than I'd guesses, so we need to be more on the ready-guard and strike again.

As the minions of No hunted Sparrow snowboarding, skiing with their own evil rifle-guns, Sparrow took out his concealed acid-gun and sprayed their weapons while snowboarding in parallel to them, melting them to hellish little diagonals.

NSA: Congrats, Sparrow!

RED SPARROW: It was all a work of time...and design.

Red Sparrow then retreated to the Himalayas where he began meditating and imagining a wily debate about modern espionage between the Hindu god of destruction, Shiva, and the folk-horror clown Pennywise, a messenger of anarchy.