Blow

Isaac draws away the two gals of the Mexican druglord Diego Nash with a diamond-heist from his mansion, hoping for real dials.

Here's a fun druglord-heist tale, no comic book fan-fiction, to sign off with instead, inspired by the film Blow (Johnny Depp). Thanks (signing off again), 

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Isaac was a thief and wanted to retire and escape civilization with his two underworld girlfriends, Pamela and Asha. The problem was both his girlfriends were tied to the Mexican druglord Diego Nash. Isaac decided to steal some very expensive rough uncut diamonds stored in Diego's house, diamonds from South Africa. Isaac started planning like a nerd.

PAMELA: "I've been Diego's maid and lover for two years, and Isaac better have a solid escape-plan if he's to convince me to help him steal diamonds from Diego's Mexican mansion so we can 'fly away' to New Zealand or Tibet."

ASHA: "If Isaac screws this up, they'll put his piano-hands into a vice; I won't be there to help him; if he wants to take Diego's South African diamonds, he better have a plan to really undercut Diego and fool the hell out of him, or else I'm out."

ISAAC: "We walk into Diego's mansion, and I tell him I'm a Wall Street investor seeking to make him some key advisory share-investments in China related to the opium market and herbal medicines. Once I get him drunk and get him to show-off his uncut diamonds from South Africa to me, I have Pamela and Asha distract his bodyguards while I pocket Diego's diamonds while I have him dancing around to his loud stereo-music in his own living-room; I connect with Pamela and Asha at the Mexico International Airport; the key here is not to upset any customs-waves at Diego's evil mansion."

Diego's mansion in Mexico really was a thing to behold. This was a real dark castle in the modern civilization. Isaac would have to be perfect in this in-house diamond heist. There wouldn't be any room for error. Isaac couldn't let the sheer dazzle of Diego's evil mansion distract him from his task, or Pamela and Asha would never follow him in this daring escape-plan.

Isaac got Diego very drunk and to show him his uncut diamonds. He got Diego to be drunk and high and dance to some cheesy 1980s music on his 'classic' Daewoo stereo in his own living-room, while Pamela and Asha were busy stroking Diego's armed two in-house bodyguards. Isaac then slowly and stealthily began substituting the uncut South African diamonds with the fake rock-gems he brought with him, worth nothing more than maybe 2K. Diego's South African uncut gems were real treasures.

As Isaac substituted Diego's fancy uncut rocks with his own mine pebbles of substantive appearance, he subtly ordered Pamela and Asha to disappear from the scene and allow the two armed guards to wander back into their monitoring positions in Diego's living-room. Isaac then told Diego he had to depart for Europe but contact would be soon regarding the profitable China investments. Diego giggled with glee and was left with the attractive 2K pebbles Isaac left for him after pocketing his real South African gems. Diego was too drunk not to continue privately boasting about the shiny pebbles left on his glass table.

Isaac had a concealed silver Wesson gun in the plant-pot of Diego's mansion, something his maid Pamela placed there for him the night before. However, fortunately, Isaac never had to use it. However, Isaac forgot about this gun and so did Pamela and Asha, and the trio just left the gun in his plant-pot. They never found out what Diego thought of this 'forgetful' souvenir.

ISAAC: We're flying to Dublin on Aer Lingus.

PAMELA: Sounds typical of you.

ASHA: Ireland is so...green!

How did Isaac get away with $20 million worth of uncut South African diamonds from the Mexican druglord Diego Nash and his two prisoner-gals Pamela and Asha? He managed to do all this with super-metaphysical planning. Isaac was a devout Catholic, and he thanked Christ for being successful in drawing away his two sweethearts from the dominion of a real modern-day darkman. That's the whole story, folks.

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"Money is everything" (Ecclesiastes)