Point Break (Fan-Fiction)

A complex story of a post-Coronavirus bank robber who we cheer for but might not be destined for delight!

My friends, since I've written a bunch of heist stories glorifying theft and piracy, here's a more tragic dramedy inspired by my favorite movie Point Break, and this doesn't have a happy ending! Thanks so much for reading (and enjoy), 

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It's a warm and bright sunny day in post-Coronavirus California, and the people are ready to flock to the beaches again, and Isaac Satan is out of his shell from his LA apartment and ready to hit the streets as a bank robber! Yes, folks, this anti-hero is an actual bank robber. He intends to rob the California Bank & Trust and make off with $40 million in cash and retire to the Virgin Islands. Right now, Isaac just wants to surf and eat shrimp tacos in sunny Cali. Can he do it?

ISAAC: "Why am I a thief? My mom wanted me to be a teacher! I tried that and it worked out well for a while, but I was too liberal and was scolded by the administration who informed me this wasn't my line of thinking. So, I did odd jobs, worked at hospitals as a patient-sitter and rounds-helper, using some scant medical training I'd acquired in the prestigious Ivy League. That was before the Coronavirus tribulation of 2020. Now that's over. Now, I'm a bank robber. I look like a nerd. That's good! I have to succeed."

Isaac wears a rabbit-mask and performs some minor bank robberies in LA before planning his major $40 million heist of the California Bank & Trust by Halloween 2024. Isaac has become infamous with his rabbit-mask, and the FBI officer trailing him, Agent Gordon, thinks this 'rabbit dude' is some kind of lunatic with visions of becoming the new Clyde Barrow or Dillinger. Gordon wants to stop him. This rabbit-dude can be stopped, right?

GORDON: "I can't stand thieves. They undermine the basic fabric of capitalism. It's worse than 9/11, because it's romanticized by countless journalists and youngsters. This rabbit dude is evil, and I'm going to catch him. I'm not letting him make a mockery of the California penal system!"

ISAAC: I met a beautiful girl the other day in San Diego, a school-teacher named Jennifer. I told her not to tell me her surname. I told her to keep our relationship a secret. I told her I worked for the American government. She has no idea what I'm planning. However, I'm going to take her with me to the Virgin Islands with the $40 million!

Isaac doesn't want to see Jennifer become a dark woman, a cliched bad girl, because she's dating a bank robber and doesn't know it, so he tells her everything else about him --- his love of comic books and ragtime music and cooking. He tells her he doesn't want her to wear makeup at anytime except during Halloween. She's become his angel, my friends!

Isaac Satan walked into the California Bank & Trust in October 2024 wearing sunglasses and a face-mask. When the guard asks him why he's masked, he explains he has the flu and doesn't want to get other sick! He then pulls out a candy-bag filled with candy and offers it to all the guards since it's Halloween. They eat it with glee. The candy's poisoned and knocks them out temporarily. Isaac then tells the teller he has a concealed self-assembled plastic miniature gun which he's put together in the bank bathroom right before the guards fell unconscious. He tells the teller and the manager not to ring the alarm or he'll shoot the manager in the leg. In fact, he explains he might just shoot the manager in the leg anyway. The manager escorts Isaac to the vault-room and lets him take $40 million in cash and sneak out the bathroom window of the bank and run down the alley behind the bank with the money hidden in his coat linings which were pre-torn open for easy sealing.

BANK MANAGER: We encountered a real psycho and didn't want to mess with this guy, but preparations are in order to make more secured functions at our proud bank in California, so this will never happen again, and authorities are now tracking this lone bandit.

Officer Gordon thinks Isaac (the 'rabbit-dude') may go to the Gotham General Hospital in California to give the guards who were taken there after they were knocked out by his poisoned Halloween candy some gift as consolation. Gordon believes this, because he thinks this 'rabbit-dude' has a certain pizzazz for social flair. He's right. However, Isaac's long gone before Gordon arrives, having given the nurses caring for the sleeping guards some flowers.

Gordon catches Isaac two years later when he visits California after returning for a jaunt from the Virgin Islands where he's been living with his new wife Jennifer, the school-teacher we met before!

GORDON: You didn't think you'd get caught!
ISAAC: Look, I'm a lone bandit, so there're no associates here, officer.
GORDON: You slipped, Isaac.
ISAAC: Call me rabbit-dude, officer-dude.
GORDON: Right. You had some escape dream, eh?
ISAAC: Well, I was gonna grow tobacco and manage a dairy farm of some kind.
GORDON: Sounds cool.
ISAAC: Yeah, there was even an ideal girl I was about to meet to fill the details!
GORDON: That's unfortunate, but at least you're not corrupting this unmet woman.
ISAAC: Right. 
GORDON: Well, you're headed to prison --- for a long time, 'rabbit-dude.'
ISAAC: I figured this much.
GORDON: This is what you wanted in your life.
ISAAC: Not really!
GORDON: What're you going to do?
ISAAC: Try to escape and let you kill me instead.
GORDON: Man, why're thieves so...dramatic?

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"Money is everything" (Ecclesiastes)

Reviews

[Myra Fellows]

Point Break is an AWESOME movie.
I appreciate how you added the pictures. It does help solidify the story. When I read biographies or true accounts or what not, I love the pics in the middle of the book to help place faces to names and show the characters at different points of their lives or the story.
I like the "attitude" of the story. Cool and collected and whatever.

[Kari Rakitan]

Mmmmm shrimp tacos sound delicious right now.

The candy is a nice touch, but what if one of the guards is diabetic?

Please tell me there's a Part 2 to this one. You ended it on such a cliffhanger!