The Daylight Thief

A Story by Abishai100

Isaac robs a bank in California after his wife leaves him and leaves behind a treasure-chest of vintage 1980s-1990s consumerism antiques to deliver a dusky message.

One more heist-tale to sign off with, and it's a sardonic story about a bizarre American consumer with a very offbeat grudge who delivers a designed dough-boy message about consumerism antiques! This funny short was inspired by the movie The First Great Train Robbery. Thanks for reading (and enjoy!),

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"My wife was very unhappy with me and decided to engage in an adulterous affair. I went nuts. I decided to become a bank robber. I really loved her. That's life. She was beautiful."

"My name's Isaac. I walked into the California Bank & Trust on Halloween Day with a bag full of antiques and treasures to store in a vault after opening a new account at the bank. This was a very unusual day for me. The bank client representative perused my treasures before handing me the keys to the vault and escorting me into the vault room of the bank building that day."

"I always had a knack for stealth and deception and charlatan-like behaviors. I used to do some childish shoplifting, but that's all behind me now. I simply wanted to rob the California bank on Halloween Day. I was escorted into the vault room with my bag of valuable antiques/treasures, each symbolizing a unique philosophical face of consumerism and capitalism itself. The bank client representative was rather impressed with my treasures and antiques. I walked in wearing sunglasses and a Coronavirus mask."

TREASURE 1: "One-half of the $1 million McDonald's Monopoly game-piece pair from the 1990s, which I owned, Park Place."

TREASURE 2: "Red Alert robot Lamborghini shape-shifting Transformers (Hasbro) fire-chief toy from the '80s-90s."

TREASURE 3: "Classic Rossignol FT-5.80 tennis racquet, considered one of the finest from the 1990s."

TREASURE 4: "Vintage Transformers dinobots dinosaur stegasaurus Snarl robot toy (Hasbro) from the '80s-90s."

TREASURE 5: "Beautiful classic Indian ludo game-board with pieces, crafted in wood by an artisan from India."

TREASURE 6: "Awesome 1990s Swatch transparent wrist-watch from Switzerland, complete with visual working inner-gears."

TREASURE 7: "Favorite --- John Olerud Toronto Blue Jays 1990 Upper Deck Star-Rookie baseball-card."

BANK MANAGER: "Isaac, your treasure and antique collection, obviously symbols of 1980s-1990s consumerism, is quite impressive, and we'd be honored to keep your valued treasures in our client account vault-areas, along with the other items and assets held by other clients at this terrific and reliable bank, and we hope you continue happily banking with us!"

"Once I was escorted into the vault-room area by the client representative serving me at the California bank that Halloween Day, I put on my Ronald Reagan mask folded in my jacket pocket. The representative asked me why I was now wearing a mask and if it was because it was Halloween. I pulled out a chloroform-laced handkerchief from my other jacket-pocket and held it to his face and knocked him unconscious. I then took his key-ring and used it to open enough vault-boxes to take cash and diamonds worth a total of $20 million that day from that California bank."

ISAAC: "I've decided to leave my various 1980s-1990s consumerism treasures for the California Bank & Trust to hold and keep in good faith as real treasures from American capitalism; I leave these items for you before I depart for the islands, hoping you'll just remember me fondly as a random patriot in America who just wanted to flee with $20 million in exchange for some archaeological items from American consumerism, to remind everyone that his great nation is all about the 'architecture' of ambitious democracy."

Was Isaac a thief, a frustrated lunatic, a consumerism-treasure collecting archaeologist with a tragic grudge, or simply a very eccentric American patriot with a very eccentric message about American antiques, bank robbery, and the general sociopolitical 'tone' of capitalism itself? You decide, my friends!

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"Money is everything" (Ecclesiastes)