The Irish-American Extra-Credit

An idealistic CIA operative working with Irish troubles in Europe decides to use retirement money to open an iconic bar-and-eatery in multicultural New Jersey.

This is a capitalism-toast vignette as my actual sign-off piece, and it was inspired by the film Cocktail (Tom Cruise). Thanks so much for reading (signing off),

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Ajay Satan wanted to open a bar in the Irish community of southern New Jersey called Somerstown. Ajay, an Algerian-American was an Ivy League graduate (Dartmouth College) and an underground CIA operative working with Sinn Fein to resolve tensions between the IRA (Irish Republican Army) and British Parliament. Ajay now wanted to retire by opening this hospitable bar and restaurant in New Jersey with his princely inheritance fortunes and society networks. He wanted to become a capitalist prince.

Ajay's double-life prior as a CIA operative working with Irish politics and terrorism in Europe was rather complex. Ajay was trained and skilled in his use of diplomacy and mission intervention to create alternatives to governance policy complications and resolve high tensions between the P-IRA (Provisional IRA) and British Parliament. Ajay was a respected and successful agent of the CIA and wanted to help the U.S. government resolve its issues with new age terrorism between the UK and Ireland. Because Ajay was such a skilled CIA agent, he now wanted a more 'dreamy' life in New Jersey.

Ajay Satan had a ton of cash to burn and wanted to make a branch-contract with the PJ Whelihan's Irish bar-and-restaurant chain and open a branch in Somerstown (New Jersey, USA), a predominantly Irish Catholic area on the East Coast. Ajay liked New Jersey for its driving and restaurant and hotel conveniences and for its multiculturalism! He wanted to open a PJ Whelihan's bar-and-restaurant in Somerstown with the handsome money he'd acquired through princely inheritance and working life with the U.S. government as a resourceful operative!

New Jersey was of course known as the Garden State and catered to the Atlantic City area of casinos and the ocean, which was great summer fare. It was also host to horse-races and the prestigious Ivy League school Princeton University. New Jersey was also a multicultural U.S. state in demographics and was therefore symbolic of American consciousness. Ajay knew since it was a driving-state, many passerby stopped into New Jersey during cross-country travels and would stop in at his new PJ Whelihan's branch.

Ajay made sure his PJ Whelihan's opening was terrific and was prepared with the right amenities and hospitable decor and interior designs suited for a pluralist bar-and-eatery in the Garden State. Ajay wanted this branch of PJ Whelihan's to be perfect and symbolic of American activity. He wanted everything to look and feel cool and welcoming. This was, after all, an Irish-Catholic neighborhood, and the Irish were renowned for their special social attitude.

Ajay Satan brought in a royal Indian prince investor named Prince Shah who, along with his Danish princess wife Elana, were delighted to pour in funds into this Irish Catholic neighborhood bar-and-eatery in multicultural New Jersey (USA) to help Ajay retire from his life of espionage, terrorism, and political propaganda. Prince Shah and Elana wanted PJ Whelihan's in Somerstown (New Jersey) to reflect the democratic passion for pluralism living in America that Irish Catholics cherished in the new era. They provided Ajay a handsome amount of the necessary start-up funds for this retirement capitalist venture.

At the opening of the PJ Whelihan's in Somerstown (New Jersey), Bollywood celebrity-actress Aishwarya Rai was invited to attend, since she was passing through New Jersey at the time for a movie-shooting. Rai was happy to help Ajay and Prince Shah toast the success of the opening of the bar in the friendly Irish neighborhood of Somerstown and came wearing a very colorful and distinctive South Indian handmade sweater by Puja Patel (PP). Rai was photographed for the press of course.

The hired waitresses at Ajay's new establishment were gorgeous and hospitable and made the customers and patrons on opening-night quite happy! This was a terrific opening-night for PJ Whelihan's in Somerstown (New Jersey), and Ajay Satan and Prince Shah celebrated by drinking a ton of Baileys Irish Cream. The hospitable waitresses and bar-maids made the event very warm and cool.

After opening-night, PJ Whelihan's continued to be a successful establishment in Somerstown (New Jersey). Many Irish in the area became regular customers, and the establishment soon saw a wide cross-section of multi-ethnic traffic, thought the majority of the customers were Irish Catholic! Ajay Satan realized he'd made a successful venture with his CIA retirement money and with the help of Prince Shah. This was the American Dream.

PJ Whelihan's in Somerstown (New Jersey) offered standard well-known drinks and offered some colorful new original drinks of its own. These original drinks included the Irish trilayer shake called the Green Fire (GF) which was one part Baileys, one part Whiskey, and two parts extra crema and Jell-O. The establishment started receiving glowing reviews in the local press.

The interior of Ajay's bar-and-restaurant was well-conceived and designed. It was hospitable without seeming too cliched. It was cozy without feeling to home-like and therefore felt like a 'cool' dive. Ajay's PJ Whelihan's started making lots and lots of money by its first summer of operations. Ajay knew he was a retirement-life success.

The outdoor experience at the establishment during the summer months was not to be missed, since the lighting, crowds, food, and atmosphere was beyond comparison. This was normal and hip South Jersey night-life, cool yet calm. Ajay Satan felt like his vision for a CIA-retirement American Dream had come to a very imagined realization.

Ajay heard that a new Hollywood movie was being made in the area starring Jennifer Connelly (A Beautiful Mind) and Tom Cruise (American Made). This movie was called American Principality, and it was about Princeton students learning to work with new CIA diction regarding anti-democratic terrorism. Ajay decided to invite Connelly and Cruise to PJ Whelihan's during their visit to New Jersey. They accepted!

When Cruise and Connelly arrived at the PJ Whelihan's in Somerstown (New Jersey) for their special movie-shooting time visit, they were greeted by Ajay Satan and Prince Shah. They were congratulated for their overall design and decor of the establishment, and Ajay explained he'd learned quite a lot about multicultural hospitality during his professional working life with the U.S. government. Cruise remarked that this was a terrific way to spend retirement-money.

The food as well as the atmosphere of PJ Whelihan's in Somerstown (New Jersey) became known for its idyllic flavors and multicultural flair. There were Chinese, Mediterranean, American, Cajun, French, and even Italian dishes offered on its creative menu. The PJ Whelihan's executive board complimented Ajay for the splendor and success of his New Jersey branch.

Because there were so many happy Irish Catholic customers/patrons of PJ Whelihan's in Somerstown (New Jersey), a group of the regulars decided to make a group-travel investment contract with Aer Lingus, Ireland's national airline company. Now, groups of PJ Whelihan's customers from Somerstown prepared group vacations to Dublin and Geneva on Aer Lingus and this money funneling became symbolic of a modern American capitalism djinn aesthetic. The CIA would've been proud!

Prince Shah's half-brother was the Duke of a Pakistan old city called Taj and wanted to become involved in the funding of PJ Whelihan's. He jumped on-board as a third investor of the Somerstown branch. The Duke brought his Irish mother to the bar-and-restaurant after gifting Ajay and Prince Shah with an opening investment of $20 million USD.

Ajay didn't know what to do with all the money he now had, so he decided to ciphon and channel his resources wisely and save the rest for a proverbial rainy day. PJ Whelihan's in Somerstown (New Jersey) continued to flourish and function as an idyllic pluralism establishment in the Irish Catholic area. Ajay decided to provide a local French-owned underground political gazette Le Petit Journal with a colorful memoir of his CIA experiences (after graduating from Dartmouth with a dual-degree in Political Science and Intelligence) in Irish political brown rice.

AJAY: Money is everything, and I want the American Dream to look and feel human and accessible in this modern age of great socialization optimism, despite the anti-capitalism horror of 9/11. God bless America!

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"Money is everything" (Ecclesiastes)