The Energy Diaries

This is a Christmastime energy-conscious lifestyle vignette symbolic of our modern focus on 'dogma.'

This is my very very last story, which I had to write to feel more responsible about energy-conservation in this Christmas consumerism season, and it's inspired by the film Toys.

Thanks for reading (signing off),

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Ajay Satan was an ideal male nanny. He worked part-time as a newspaper delivery-man for a local paper in southern New Jersey (USA) and part-time as a nanny for multiple children in an apartment building in Philadelphia. He was loved by the kids he cared for as a nanny/babysitter, and he seemed to genuinely enjoy the work he was doing, since he had a natural charm and magnetism when working with youngsters. Yes, Ajay was basically the perfect modest American man in the modern (21st Century) world.

Then, one day, while Ajay was taking two of his babysitting-job kids on a walk in the park and in a stroller-ride, he came across the Hollywood (USA) super-celebrity Leo DiCaprio who was in Philadelphia at the time to make a special appointment for an eco-conservation work related media visit to the famous/iconic Philadelphia Zoo. You see, the Philadelphia Zoo was considered one of the best zoos and animal-parks in the modern world, and Leo was the head of the eco-conservation organization the Leonardo DiCaprio Foundation (LDF) and wanted his LDF group to work with the new endangered-tigers project at the Philly Zoo. Ajay crossed paths with Leo that day in the park and immediately recognized Leo's handsome presence and camera-magnetic charm.

Leo realized that Ajay was a rather socially values-driven male nanny and was impressed he'd met a movie-fan who was a surprisingly responsible and mature care-giving man in a modern world otherwise filled with all kinds of individuals who were invested in new age convenience-driven indulgences and gluttonies like cheeseburgers and cigarettes! Leo told Ajay about the LDF Philly Zoo media project and invited the nanny-man to come to the event when it would air on TV, and Ajay Satan happily accepted the invitation. When Ajay arrived at the zoo with two of his babysat kids for the event, he was thrilled with all the nifty eco-conscious activity and afterwards, Leo introduced Ajay to Leo's newest girlfriend, actress Diane Kruger. Ajay asked Leo, "You find it extremely easy to have girlfriends of great magnetism all the time, Leo?" Leo smirked and coolly replied, "It seems to me you think Diane is rather...photogenic...right?"

Well, Leo and Ajay struck up a cool Philly friendship. Leo invited Ajay to his hotel room the following Saturday night for a champagne-party, and when he arrived, Ajay began talking mostly with just Leo and his girlfriend Diane. The three decided to form an offbeat threeway-association. They spent much time over the next three months doing various recreational things in the City of Brotherly Love (Philadelphia), including attending an Eagles-Saints (NFL) game. Ajay started falling in love with Diane and began making love to her. They finally confessed this to Leo, and when Leo was angry, Diane suggested they all make peace by creating a fun intellect-contest, to see which of the male suitors could better create an eco-hybrid Lamborghini design ad for LDF. Whoever won would win Diane's heart!

Ajay made an ad about a Lamborghini souped up with a cool biomass fuel turbine-engine and placed his cat Daffy and two of his nanny-daycare service kids in the ad. The ad offered the message, "Biomass is the way we think now, because our modern lives are much more synergized!" Diane loved Ajay Satan's eco-Lamborghini ad for the LDF so much that she told him and Leo that Ajay had won the little 'eco-contest.' Ajay and Diane began dating and eventually married. Diane got another cat and named the cat Sal (after a Kerouac character!).

LEO: I've had a hell of a time engaging with civilian consumers!

TRUMP: People today love media, Leo.

LEO: It's a media-drenched modern world, Mr. President.

TRUMP: How's your work with your eco-conservation group?
LEO: Incidentally, I recently lost my girlfriend in a little 'eco-ad contest.'
TRUMP: Oh, a rival suitor made an eco-ad/message superior and won her heart away?

LEO: Right.

TRUMP: That sucks...

LEO: Right now, I'm dating French supermodel Evina Anis.

TRUMP: Cool!
LEO: I'm taking her on an eco-conservation mission to Antarctica!

TRUMP: Wow, is she really into that kind of thing?

LEO: Oh yeah.
TRUMP: Well, this will help you forget about that last loss.
LEO: Right, Diane Kruger.
TRUMP: Do you miss Diane (she was great in the film Troy)?

LEO: She was a really good pianist, and I'll miss that the most.
TRUMP: Maybe your new girlfriend can attend an opera with you.

LEO: That's a good idea, Mr. President.

TRUMP: You should see the First Lady's new skylight!

LEO: Is it a skylight that reminds her of eco-work?
TRUMP: Yes, that's why she installed it, for a new solar dream.

LEO: Hail to everyday optimism!

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