Run

I still write poems poorly but I haven't submitted in a while, and I felt like doing something about what goes through my head when I run.

I like running at a certain time between the day and night
when the people are sleeping and the birds haven't yet risen to sing their morning song,
when the moon is caught awkwardly in the sky between dusk and dawn
I run.
I run over great swathes of unyielding grass
over decrepit sidewalks with gnarled roots digging into them
I run past the baleful woods that envelopes me in its secretive silhouette,
I don't stop when I'm tired, I don't stop when I'm frightened,
I run.

Exhausted, I still notice a hundred small details
the sound of music begins to blur
my vision grows dimmer
I can't breathe...

If I stop I don't matter, if I stop I don't care enough
If I stop while I'm still able to take one forward step
I don't ever want to seen the sunrise again.

Reviews

[misha]

This is a very interesting write. Great job!

[Stammers]

Why is this only at 92% odd?

People have no taste. This is awesome.

Two things I picked up on -

haven't yet risen to sing their morning song - maybe you could get a little more creative with this? All of your other expressions are beautifully unique and a little strange. Just my thing.

And, you have typo - 'baleful woods that envelopes me' - so, either 'baleful wood that envelopes me' or 'baleful woods that envelope me'

I loved the statement 'If I stop I don't matter, if I stop I don't care enough'

struck a deep chord with me.

Your last line fell a little awkwardly, though. See the sunrise again, you mean? Maybe revise it. I love this piece.

[Akshat♥]

I also love to run ..especially when people affect me..
it always makes you strong..
nicely written poem...keep writng!! :)

[Cole Hayley]

I love running late at night as well. In the summer I use to be up until atleast 4am everynight so I use to go for a jog before I slept. The poetry here is very solid, the format is diffrent but it works