Sands of Old

A Poem about one of the most magnifacent places on earth

As The sun glimmers

I long for the long forgotten and long remembered past,

I wish that I may one day see its wonders.

To live even for a second in its grace.

To grovel at its feet, and wish me worthy to lay my eyes upon it.

To walk the halls of which the spirits no longer roam their quest complete,

To kiss the sands of time so I may take a peek inside the books now incomplete,

But I never wish to disturb you I wish that you may stay buried in your warm blanket of gold.

I do not wish to wake you I merely wish to gaze upon your tomb.

Oh to be born a time in which you ruled, the treasures I would give.

To have a chance to give my blood and lay those bricks.

For those you have challenged are that of time and for many years you have won the battle.

Author's Note

Updated version. Let me know what you think

Reviews

[sithlordjp]

An interesting look into a fascinating place. You captured the magnificient beauty, the mystery dating back centuries... You do have the word "wish" repeated quite a bit. If it is your intent to keep all of them, you could place them differently, to create a rhythm, a pulse for the entire piece, just a thought! Well done!

[AWickedMoon]

Thank you! I did remove one of the wishes. :)

[spiritwind]

I hope you get an opportunity to visit Egypt and explore its mysteries--you have even awakened a desire in me to "To walk the halls of which the spirits no longer roam "--

[AWickedMoon]

I do hope so, and thats wonderful to spark a feeling so great in someone. Thank you. :)

[Norma M Sutton]

I like it. In this sentence do you mean blank, as you have it, or blanket?

But I never wish to disturb you I wish that you may stay buried in your warm blank of gold.

[AWickedMoon]

Oo yes I will fix that right away! Thank you! :)

[Dhaye]

I also wanted to see those pyramids... the wonder of how they are built. But the hurting truth is I don't know when this dream would come true.

[AWickedMoon]

Sadly the way they were built is lost. I have never been but if there’s only one thing I get to do in this life it would be to see the pyramids. I hope that you get the chance as well. :)

[Mary Pipikakis]

Awesome :)
The imagery is beautiful!

[Mary Pipikakis]

Also, I've been to Egypt, it is an amazing place!!

[AWickedMoon]

Thank you! Sadly I have not had the chance yet to go to Egypt yet, you are lucky! But I'm planning in the next year or two. :)

[Calibaster]

I have wished for that sort of stuff before too, but have never tried to put into poetic lines that actually make sense! You did an amazing job with it though. Keep up the awesome work. :)

[AWickedMoon]

Thankyou for the awesome comment!

[Calibaster]

Your welcome!

[Lucien Maier]

very good! This really shows not only the mystery of the place, but you longing to be part of not only the place but the time and the construction come through very well. (Although unless a king I doubt I would like to live in that time :) ) the piece is well executed good work.

[AWickedMoon]

Actually living back then wouldnt acutally be that bad unless you were at the very bottom. Thankyou for your kind words. :)

[Lucien Maier]

well not to be bold but 90% of their population were slaves and therefore the "Lowest" .... I understand the romantic ideas. but when reality comes in no it was not a prosperous age. It was a tyrannical government that saddled the desires of a few on a large population. Anyway good write though :D

[Uroš D. Stojanov..]

I always wanted to visit Egypt and who knows, I might even do it someday...

You're doing an amazing job showing your passion for Egyptian culture and really like that. So far so great mate, the poem looks good and I can't wait for the final version...

[AWickedMoon]

I practically worship Egypt. I would take ever class there was for Egyptology unfortunate I’d have to go half way across the country to study and don’t have that kind of money for it, so I read about it in books and TV I remember on Egypt week I watched the same program every day ha-ha! I've always felt a strange loyalty to Ancient Egypt.

[Uroš D. Stojanović]

I always found it inspiring... if I have enough money when I start working, Egypt is most definitely one of my top 5 must visit... :)

[AWickedMoon]

I'm planning on going to Britian(the other place I feel close to and have family) and going next year to egypt. Only waiting to go there because of all the uprising.

[AWickedMoon]

I am thinking about changing the ending to the following but I’m not sure if it’s too cliché.

"For those you have challenged are that of time and for many years you have stood the test of time"

[Dream Mistress]

:) I loved it

[AWickedMoon]

Thankyou!

[Dream Mistress]

your welcome