Chapter 1 - “Sometimes we have to fall to learn how to get up”

The intro will be changed once the book develops more.

Our lives sometimes often reach a point where time appears to halt and we are suddenly presented with the creeping feeling of anxiety and dread taking control of our lives. Sometimes the smallest actions seem to become the biggest epidemic, exaggeratedly seeming like the end of the world. Dropping some toast in the morning after you’ve chanted the usual “Where art thou now that I need you Lord, my life is crumbling” mantra, it feels as if we have been marooned by what people call God, a mere idea of a creator to give people a reason in life. These conflicts that we constantly have to deal with tend to make people speculate quite often about how they’re going to change their life forgetting about the why it’s happening in the first place.

 

*

 

                Usually around this time of the year people tend to put up a Christmas tree and they prepare the house for the Christmas holidays and enjoy the festivities. Not everyone is as lucky to have such delights unfortunately, that’s what’s going on in Ilbert’s life, and he’s working during the whole thing. He’s your typical guy, he goes to work, goes to the bar to have a beer after a long day at the office and talks to the lady at the bar, and watches TV to help him fall sleep.

                “Bert can I see you in my office please?” Said the man from the other far end of the office, he had a glorious trim. “There’s something I need to talk to you about.” he coughed as he did so.

                Ilbert went almost swallowing dry and as he walked into the office he welcomed his presence and sat in the chair in front of the desk. “Is everything alright?” he asked trying to comfort himself from whatever might come.

                “Ilbert, you’ve worked with us for over 4 years now” and as the man spoke, Ilbert felt his heart speed up in a hiccup. “You know we’ve let some people go over this past month, some were your friends, and it has been a very difficult decision to make, but unfortunately we can’t afford to keep you in our pay roll any longer.

                “The company has slowly been losing profit, this past month you manage to make us lose 3 clients, high end clients to make it specific. You couldn’t meet your quota, and that is it. If there is no food to feed a man, then a man can’t support another and that just happens to be the harsh reality.”

                “But I need this job! You don’t understand!” Ilbert shouted from the top of his lungs, angry he swayed his arms side to side confused. “If you do this to me, I will lose everything; this is the only way I have to pay my debt!”

                “I’m sorry.” The man said ending the dialogue. “Finish your shift.”

 

*

 

                He had gotten home and it was dark, this time he didn’t even try turning on the lights. He lingered in the hallway for a second as he took off his shoes. He opened the fridge in hopes there would still be something worth drinking, a beer would had been the perfect choice but spoilt milk was all he had found and so he sat in the sofa, in the privacy of his own solace and loneliness. He reached out for the table and picked up the letter that was on top, he opened it up once more to read its content, and as he did so a tear slowly formed in the corner of his eye, and then slowly slid down his chick and has it was hit by the dim light being shun from the moon it almost seemed like it glittered. “Warning! This is the last notice letter advising you to pay your debt in the amount of $34,237 by the end of the March. If the payment has not been completed by then, your valuables will be collected to cover up the sum.”

 

*

 

                The weather was feeling rather gloomy that day, the clouds blacked out the sun and there was constant precipitation that would stop every 5 minutes. He took his old car he had been driving for 3 years to a man in town that dealt with cars, and as he drove he would mention all the thing he had been through with the car to himself, all the times he was too drunk to drive home so he would sleep in front of the bar,  and has he got closer to the man’s garage he would remember that the car served him as shelter when he got sacked from his last apartment because he couldn’t afford it any longer after he had broken up with his girlfriend. He chuckled a little “That b***h ruined my life” he said in a laugh that would make anyone think he’s crazy.

                “Hey mate I was wondering how much you would give me for my Volvo. This boy is special to me.”

                “Oh yeah? Why’d you want to sell it?” cheerfully asked the man wondering.

                “I have some debt I have to pay for… Can’t keep the car anymore” he looked at the car, hoping that he would get a good offer for what seemed to be his biggest mental break down. “It’s a financial hazard, can’t just let it sit on the road either.”

                The man immediately looked at the car and examined it. “It’s well preserved on the outside at least.” He kept looking around and then opened the hood and that’s when he stopped smiling. The whole of the motor was covered in oil, there were loose wired which he suspected were supposed to be feeding the radio, he had also noticed there was a problem with the drive shaft when Ilbert had driven inside the garage. “I will give you $2500 for it, but this car needs a lot of attention.”

                “Can you not do me a solid? Please that car cost me $12000 when I bought it, at least $6000.”

                The man shook his head, and offered $3000 instead and said he couldn’t go higher than that, he had a business, any excess purchases or bad investments could lead him to lose his business too. Ilbert understood that from his last conversation with his boss, apparently  that’s the way the world goes around, you do what you can, and when you can’t there is nothing else you can do.

 

*

 

                Ilbert’s biggest desire was to become successful, he wanted to travel the world and the more he dreamt of hit, the harsher life seemed to become. Some people consider the presence of negative outcomes to be a good omen; they say it represents change, life moulding itself, your future. No one cherishes riches more than the poor they say.

                He had sold some jewellery, his car, some branded clothes he still had and some items he had in the house in an attempt to cover his gargantuan debt together with any savings he had managed to make from his previous job. Later as he sat on the small couch he embraced how bare his life had become, the house felt a lot colder and any sounds would echo through the room. On top he counted all his earnings, he had a paper in which he calculated everything, for a total he had manage only $12,658. His mind went blank and he sat back gazing at the nothingness the ceiling had to offer, he could see the dust particles slowly moving through the air as the light from the sunset pierced through the window illuminating the far corner of the room.

                “I wonder how I will ever manage to get the rest of the money” he thought to himself as he looked around the house, and the last thing he had was the house, but he wouldn’t want to get rid of the only shelter he still had, even if not for long, he would either sell it and cover his debt, or the debt would cover itself by men taking away his house but either way, he would end up in the streets. “Perhaps I’ll sell drugs” He thought to himself in a chuckle.

 

*

 

                The months were passing, without coming to any means of solving his problem. January had passed, he had spent $400 of what he had gotten to keep himself alive, and then February came and finally March. Sometimes you can really see what a person is capable of doing in the moment of despair. Ilbert grabbed all the money he had and shoved it in a bag and headed to a casino.

                “What a surprise to see you here again” said the old man sitting down at the poker table, he was quite old. He had a moustache that stretched far from his lips like a Texan cowboy from the movies, and wore a hat and a cowboy shirt which just made it that much more stereotypical.

                “Yeah, I know it’s a bad idea but I have to cover my debt.”

                The old man laughed, he laughed so hard some people sitting in the other tables stopped to look at the fuss that was going on. “Cover your debt you say? Isn’t all this how you got that debt to begin with?”

                Ilbert’s face became pale for a second, he breathed so heavily you could nearly hear him from the other side of the casino despite all the ruckus and chattering going on. “I have nothing else to lose.” He said in an attempt to comfort his own mind.

                “Let’s play then.” The old man said gently.

                The dealer approached the table and dealt the first hand and many hours later of playing Ilbert was starting to become hopeful as he had just doubled his money and was so close to being able to pay it all off. “I can’t believe I’m doing it! I should stop while I have the chance” he thought to himself.

                “All in” said one woman that sat opposite Ilbert. Her eyes drifted from the cards to his eyes quite often, her gaze seduced him, it was almost as if he had been hypnotised by her beauty.

                “All in” said Ilbert confident in himself.

                The dealer finally put the final card on the table and the smirk Ilbert had in his face vanished faster than he could have anticipated.  He stood up, grabbed his jacket and walked away.

 

*

 

                This time he was lying down on the floor. He didn’t think of anything, he simply laid there waiting to be taken away and the time passed. The hours went by slowly, the sound of the clock had seemed to slow down to the point his heart beat had synched to it, beating harmoniously with time. “That’s funny” he thought to himself. “I’m not scared, I’m not sad, I’m simply disappointed.”

                *Knock knock*

                Ilbert simply laid there as the sound of the door seemed to muffle in the distance.

                *Knock knock*

                The men broke the door open, and walked into the house. “We have a warrant to take all your belongings.” One of the man said has he held a paper in his hand. “You have the right to hold us back, but that may result in you going to prison.”

                Ilbert didn’t care at this point, he laid there seeing everything being taken away as the men shouted and walked about. He had nothing else to lose, and so he lost everything.