Soul's Call

Fated stars hidden in ocean colored eyes,
a state of wonder, curiosity,
searching for heavily guarded secrets, of mine
making an ordinary mind feel like wildfire, by design.
A shield from the torrent of worldly life,
I am disarmed by your steady umbrella,
exposed
a surrender
to feel alive.
A weary soul responds to a calling
across ages and centuries of time,
whispering, the echoes, and oh...
how they chime
hidden in something deeper than flesh,
neither yours, nor mine.
A pull, like the moon holds the sea's 
all but forgotten tides
the blossoms that unfurl and stretch
opening only,
to morning's light.
This breath of purest dawn
ancient in time,
this completion of a soul
that none who witness, can deny.

Reviews

[Thaddius]

Great command of the flow here, the emotion. 'wildfire, by design... torrent of worldly life...steady umbrella...deeper than flesh.. a pull, like the moons... the blossoms that unfurl and stretch opening only to mornings light.' Ah. Beautiful. A talented Poet, you are! (I feel like Yoda). You have the soul and the skill to express it. Great sense of sound. To nitpick: There are lines like 'heavily guarded secrets' 'a state of wonder, curiosity' that are just too common for you to use. Just think of an inventive way to say that, or just cut it, don't feel like you have to over-explain. I know you can tell the difference between the lines I quoted first and those.

[Aramey]

Thank you for the read and review, and the points you made are extremely helpful :) I'll be popping over at some point tomorrow, or today for that matter, to return the favor. I love how you easily distinguished where you saw room to improve. I truly appreciate that :)