A Bullet to the Heart

A vulnerable girl fights what she loves the most... The painful killer of obsession... The pretty deceiver of addiction... I always have trouble describing this.

 

You ask me why I am frightened

At these bruises on my arm.

I cannot recall exactly what happened,

Or if my memory of it is real.

You convince me that I am crazy

And that you saved me from myself,

But if this is truly me,

You still haven't pulled me from my hell.

 

I wonder why there are tears

Washed across my face.

Your sweet voice is all I hear,

Making me believe I am insane.

But the voice is tainted,

And there is darkness in its tone.

For if you said you hate me,

I would believe that it was true.

 

You are a bullet to the heart.

The words you speak,

They are a bullet to the heart.

If you get near me,

It is a bullet to the heart.

 

Brave a touch, and the blood runs down your hand.

Dare to look, and you simply cannot understand

How you are still alive in this depression.

You are my sole obsession.

If getting close to you gets me killed,

I will flirt with death against my will.

Because, you're a bullet to the heart.

 

I whisper that I love you,

And you pull me deathly close.

Then it fades to a chimerical world,

And I know not where I go.

I wake up in confusion.

What have you done to me?

Is this hate or is this love?

This cruel abyss is all I see.

 

You promise that I need you.

Without you, I would be lost.

I almost don't believe you,

Until, while running, I am caught.

I cannot hide.

Somehow, you keep me in.

You are deep within my mind,

Controlling what I think.

 

You are a bullet to the heart.

Your protective hold,

Is still a bullet to the heart.

I don't feel safe anymore.

It is a bullet to the heart.

 

I check the hole where I can't feel.

The blood lets me know it's real.

I am consumed in this depression,

Through my seductively noxious obsession.

If getting close to you gets me killed,

I will flirt with death against my will,

Because, you're a bullet to the heart.

 

You never accept my contradictions,

Blowing me off like I am a little girl.

You vow to heal me of my addictions,

Yet I am stuck in this deranged world.

And if I claim I do not believe you,

You hypnotize me to a thrall trance.

I once swore never to leave you,

But I am becoming your pet.

 

I refuse to surrender.

I refuse to let you win.

Break me, and I will bear the hurt

With a sickly grin.

You know that I would die for you.

If you take advantage of that,

I have got something in store for you.

This time, I am fighting back.

 

Yes, you’re the bullet to my heart.

Your pleasure trips

Are the bullet through my heart.

The scars you left

Were the bullet through my heart.

 

I tried to clot the wound.

I bleed because I fell for you.

I am still stuck in this depression,

Because I have lost my sole obsession.

If getting close to you gets me killed,

I will flirt with death against my will...

You are the bullet through my heart.　

Author's Note

Some of you may interperate this as suicide, but the bullet is figurative.

Reviews

[wijdan]

wow
its a bullet to my mind now ;) ;)
you've put a feel in it .. great
its really nice
i loved this one