Not of this Earth? (or Untitled)

Allie meets someone, and learns some distressing news about her life, or what she thought she knew...

When I was little, I used to look up at the sky and yearn for it.  The sky, I mean.  I actually missed it, in a way.  Is that weird?  Seems like I used to lie in the grass in the front yard under the stars and could almost imagine them reaching out for me.  It was a very comforting feeling.  In my mind I would float endlessly, wrapped safely in the arms of the stars and the moon.    Knowing what I know now, I know how and why things happened the way they did, but looking back I realize that he really did sort of just “appear”. 

It was a summer like any other, I guess.  When it’s just too hot to stay outside for very long.   That intense, hot Texas sun just beating you senseless.  But at the same time, the sun is out, not a cloud in the sky…it’s beautiful.  You start to head out to “catch some rays”, but the moment you step out the door, the heat just sucks the life right out of you.  It’s just hot.  And, it really was…hot, I mean. 

I was working in a real estate office that summer, trying to raise tuition for college in the fall.   Shortly before graduation, my parents had alerted me to the fact that there was really not much of a college fund, per se…but that they would help whenever they could.  Guess it’s a good thing I worked as hard as I did in high school, and got the grades, otherwise I never would have gotten that scholarship.  I hadn’t done too badly, really.  Had gotten myself through two years of school, almost completely on my own.    

The real estate office was clean, the people were nice, and it was air conditioned.  Not much more I could have asked for really.  My boss was almost never there, which really just meant I was constantly having to go to him at various locations, but it was still a relatively simple job.  I was his personal assistant.  I just had to assist him.   The only thing is, he’s kinda hopeless.  Like, can’t figure out how to use the fax machine, hopeless.   So, I actually do A LOT of running around for him.  He’s a super nice guy, so I don’t mind so much.  I’m glad I didn’t end up stuck with some other jerk, who can’t keep his hands to himself, if you know what I mean.  When I first started  there was this other realtor, Jay, who would try to grab my a*s every time I walked by.  Seriously.  Loser.  The sad part is, Jay is good looking.  But, he is such a swine when it comes to women, he is perpetually single.  A serial dater, you might say.  My boss is actually the owner of the company.  His name is Darren.  He’s 40-something, with reddish-blonde hair and gray eyes.  Very striking.  Never been married (and not interested, he says.)  He’s sort of the sweet, hyper-intelligent, wealthy, caring uncle I never had.  He actually had a “talk” with Jay, who never tried to grab my a*s again, by the way.  I frequently house sit with his dogs when he is away (which is pretty often.)   And, that sort of brings us to Jeremy. 

It was Friday afternoon.  I had just gotten a call from Darren to let me know that he would not be back from San Antonio until Monday, and could I please go see to Misty and Jada, his two beloved bull mastiffs.  I said that I would.   Then since it was four o’clock, I grabbed my purse and headed out.  The heat blasted me square in the face as I exited the air conditioned office.  I began to sweat immediately, though not heavily, thankfully.  My car was parked only a few feet from the door, in Darren’s space.  I proceeded to open the two front doors, to allow the heat to escape before finally climbing in and starting the engine, cranking the a/c up to full power.  I sat and breathed a heavy sigh as the heat pouring from the vents gradually began to cool, until finally I was bathed in chilling, gale force splendor.   I checked over my left shoulder, then began to slowly back out into the start of “rush hour” traffic on Green street.  I plugged my iPod into the outlet and hit shuffle.  And then I was in the zone.  That partial trance I tend to fall into as I make my way home after a long day at work.  The music is my escape, and I treasure it fully.  I get lost in the beats, the lyrics, the tune…until I feel completely at ease.  I turned into the driveway in front of my parent’s house and prepared myself to go inside.

Something I should explain, I suppose, is that I don’t have what you would call a “traditional, loving relationship” with my parents.  It’s more…functional, for lack of a better word.  We don’t fight incessantly, or hate each other, it’s not an “abusive” type situation.  I guess, they really tend to sort of dismiss me.  I truly believe that they never actually planned to have children.  It seems that at some point, they decided to “give it a try”, and they adopted me when I was six.  Not a good idea, as it turns out.  They soon tired of parenting, and just sort of stopped.  I honestly don’t have a lot of memories from my childhood.  What I have is hazy, at best.   My parents just seemed to decide not to devote much time to my raising.  I mean, they provided for me, clothing, food, etc.  But, I had to ask for it.  Don’t get me wrong, they love me in their own way.  It’s just a sort of, sporadic love, I suppose.  Once it stops being convenient for them, they just kind of, drop out for a while.  Somehow, in the last fifteen years, I have developed this deeply ingrained need for love and support, which I generally get from other outside parties.  My best friend Carrie Anne, who has lived three houses down from me for as long as I can remember, being the most prevalent.  She is the sister I never had and her mother, incidentally, is more a mother to me than my own.  I spent many a happy night there when we were teenagers.  So, when I arrive home in the evenings, I feel this desire to be “welcomed” home, you know?  “How was your day, dear?”  All that stuff.  But, my house just doesn’t really work that way.  It’s a good night if they acknowledge that I’ve come home at all.  They’re kind of like reluctant roommates.   Really just not that interested.  Sounds harsh, I know, but it’s just their way.   

I opened the front door and closed it, slightly harder than was necessary, as is my custom.  (Ever the optimist, hoping for some response.)  Nothing, though I could hear someone stirring in the kitchen area.  I dropped my keys into the dish on the table inside the hallway, then made my way down the hall to the kitchen.  My mother was sitting at the counter, absently flipping through a cookbook.  I knew she wasn’t actually looking at it, since to my knowledge, the woman had never cooked a meal in her life.  I said,

“Hi.  What’s going on?”

“Nothing much.  Just waiting for Luke to get home.  You going out?”

I stared at her for a moment.  This shouldn’t bother or surprise me, but it always does.  More so, lately.

“Uhh…just got home, actually.   I am going to stay out at Darren’s place for the weekend, though.  So, I guess I’ll just see you guys Monday?”

She had started twirling a strand of her hair while I was talking.  This generally signifies that the conversation is over, so I made my way past her to the stairs.  I walked, quickly, up the stairs to my room and shut the door behind me.  I stood in the darkness for several minutes, shrugging off the tiny ball of rejection that clung to my shoulders.  I flipped the light switch and at the same moment my cell phone started chirping, shattering the silence.  I nearly came out of my skin.     I fished it out of my purse and seeing the display.  Then, with a happy sigh, I hit the button and said,

“Hello, Carrie Anne…”

 

 

The road Darren lives on is sort of a country road, in that it is somewhat remote, and mostly dirt or sand.  Pretty dark at night, even though there are a few light poles, they don’t provide a lot of light, so you have to have your bright lights on so you don’t go off the road into the ditch on either side.  I had just turned onto his road from the main street, and was in fact only a few feet from his long driveway, when there was a super quick, blinding flash of light.  In the split second it took for my brain to register it, I panicked a little, thinking it was another car coming too fast out of a driveway.  So, I swerved to the right, towards Darren’s driveway…and that’s when I hit him.  I hit him hard, too.  I saw him fly a few feet away from the front of my car!  I almost had a heart attack.  I think my heart actually stopped beating for a moment.  I slammed on the brakes, and then just sat there, stunned, for several seconds before adrenaline kicked in and I threw it into park and climbed out of the car.   

I could see him lying in the road, dusty and still.  Frighteningly still.  I slowly crept up on him, and stood staring down, willing him to awaken.  He looked fairly young, maybe twenty or thirty something.  Attractive.  At least I thought so, it was hard to tell from the way he was laying, plus it was getting dark.  His dark hair was shaggy, and partly covering his face.  His jeans were ripped open at one knee, and one of his shoes was missing.  I reached down to push his hair back out of his face and he moaned loudly.  I yelped.  What?  I was alone in the dark with a strange man that I had just HIT WITH MY CAR!  I squatted beside him, gently placed my hand on his chest and said,

“Oh my god.  Are you okay?  I am SO sorry.  I didn’t see you at all!  There was this other car and the lights were too bright, and I…hello?”

He seemed to be blinking a lot.  I waved my hand in front of his face.  He seemed to focus a little more then.  He said,

“What was that?”

“What was what?”  I said.

“I think I just got hit by something.”

Okay…not too bright.  Maybe he has a concussion.  He started to sit up, but I pushed gently on his chest,

“Wait!  Don’t get up.  You should stay where you are, I’ll call for help.”

“Why can’t I get up?”  he frowned.

“Because you might have serious injuries.”

Even as I said it, I began to notice that he didn’t really.  Even though his jeans were torn and he was completely disheveled, he did not appear to be bleeding anywhere, at all.  This seemed a little strange, but still there could be internal injuries, right?  He proceeded to sit up anyway, heedless of my pleas.  I said,

“Do you live near here?  Let me take you there, and help you…recover?  I’m sorry, this has never happened to me before.  I’m a little…well, a little freaked out, to tell you the truth.  I have no idea what to do.”

The look on his face went from confusion to total concern in an instant.  He reached for my hand and the moment it connected, there was a buzz, for lack of a better word.  I know how completely lame that sounds, but it’s true.  I don’t really want to call it a “spark”, because that sounds super cheesy, but that’s pretty much what it was.  I jumped a little, and pulled away quickly.  He stood up, brushed himself off, then reached down and gently pulled me up by my upper arms, the way you might do a young child.  At that moment, I couldn’t stop staring at him.  I have no idea why.  I felt like an idiot, but I stood transfixed.  To look at him, you would never know that he had just been hit by a car.  He appeared the picture of health and vitality.  I couldn’t quite get my brain to wrap around it.  I could feel my heartbeat speeding up, and I started to swoon.  It felt like the ground was rushing up to meet me.  He grabbed my elbow and steadied me, saying,

“Allison?  Are you alright?  Let’s sit.”

He led me back to my car, and sat me in the driver’s seat, then squatted in front of me.  I took great pains to keep breathing regularly.  I have this condition in which during extremely stressful situations, my heart beats too fast and I forget to breathe regularly, and then I pass out.   A condition which I have almost completely mastered over the years…until now.  I hadn’t had a fainting spell since I was twelve or thirteen.  What was wrong with me?  I looked up to find him staring at me, intently, concern etched all over his face.  I blinked and mumbled,

“Did you just call me Allison?”

“That’s your name, isn’t it?”

I said, “Yes, but I didn’t tell you that.  How did you know that?”

He didn’t respond right away.  Then,

“You must have.  When you were first speaking to me, maybe?”

I wracked my brain, still fuzzy from the spell.  Had I?  I didn’t remember telling him my name, but it was possible.  I suddenly wished, fervently, for a glass of water.  My throat was parched and screaming.  I could feel the sheen of sweat forming on my arms.  He said,

“Okay.  Let’s get you inside.  Where were you going?”

I pointed limply to the entrance to Darren’s driveway.  He pulled me to my feet and we started walking slowly up the drive.  After about 15 yards, the house was visible, lit up by the porch and yard lights.  It was a beautiful old house.  Two storeys, wrap around porch, complete with pretty white wicker furniture.  I always thought it was funny that Darren liked all his things to be picturesque, though he rarely took the time to enjoy them.  I could hear the dogs barking as we climbed the steps to the door.   I swore,

“My keys!  I left my freaking keys in the ignition.”

My handsome stranger gently bade me sit in one of the chairs, and smiled saying,

“Wait here.  I’ll get them.  Try to relax, okay?”

He zipped down the stairs and jogged, actually JOGGED back down the driveway.  I stared dumbly after him.  How is he jogging after being hit by a car?!  How is that possible?  My brain felt faintly scrambled, so I sat back and closed my eyes.  Seconds later, I heard a car pulling into the driveway.  He had driven my car up into the driveway.  How thoughtful.  My head was clearing, at last.  I felt more alert and less groggy.  I stood up as he exited the car and heard the beep as he hit the lock on the keychain.  He jogged up the steps to me, and handed me my keys with a shy smile.  Okay, he was more than handsome.  I stammered,

“Thank you….?”

“Jeremy.” He replied.

“Thank you Jeremy.  I’ll just…umm…”

I fumbled with the keys, then finding the right one, jammed it into the lock.  It clicked open, I turned the knob and stepped inside.  Before I could tap the light switch, I was nearly bowled over by the two furiously happy beasts of the house, desperate to go outside.  I shrieked a little, then began to giggle uncontrollably as they licked and licked my face and arms.  Finally, I shoved them away, which is a lot like trying to shove a freight train, and said,

“Girls…GIRLS!  Down.  Get down!  Outside?  Let’s go outside!”

 Then made my way to the back door, knowing they would follow me to go outside.  I tapped the light switch in the dining room, and kitchen on my way back to the front door, where I found Jeremy waiting patiently. 

I wasn’t sure why, but a largely uncontrollable part of me insisted on asking him to come in.  Even though a smaller more sensible part of my brain screamed “NO!”   I had no idea who this guy was.  But, I had just hit him with my car.  It seemed the least I could do was offer him a drink, right?  I pulled the door further open and said,

“Why don’t you come in?  Have a seat.  Can I get you something to drink?”

He sat on one of the bar stools, and leaned forward on the bar.  The way he was watching me was all at once exciting and slightly unnerving.  And, I wasn’t sure which was more unsettling.  I opened the refrigerator, not really sure what I would find.  I thought Darren’s cleaning lady, Elsa, had been by this week, and usually she brought groceries.  But, she didn’t if he wasn’t going to be here.  Luckily, this had been a last minute trip and she had left food and things this week.  I pulled out a pitcher of sweet tea and got out two glasses and filled them to the top.   Handing one to Jeremy, I greedily drained my glass halfway before I realized that he wasn’t drinking his.  He smelled it, then took a tiny sip.  He seemed to be contemplating the taste.  He said,

“What is this?”

I wasn’t sure how to answer that.  First I sat on one of the barstools, then said,

“You’re not from around here, are you?  It’s sweet tea.  Do you prefer unsweet?  There may be some soda in there somewhere…”

“No.  This is good.  I just…never had it before.  Thank you.”

Okay.   I asked,

“Are you sure you’re okay?  Maybe you should lie down or something.”

He thought for a moment, then replied,

“Really?  I feel fine.  I don’t feel any pain.  Should I be feeling pain?”

“After being hit by a car?  YES!  Generally, I mean.  I don’t know, I’ve never actually been hit, but it certainly seems like it would be painful.  But, you don’t seem to be harmed in any way.  How is that even possible?  I saw you fly a few feet in the air, for crying out loud!” 

I realized that I had gotten steadily louder and louder, and was in fact shouting at this point.  My heart was racing and my breathing was shallow.  I was working myself up again.  I stopped, took a deep breath, then another.  Willing myself to be calm, to breathe.  Jeremy had that alarmed look on his face again.  He anxiously watched me, asking,

“What’s happening?  What should I do?”  

I had begun to feel calmer, again.  It was then that I started really assessing him.  Yes, he was spectacularly good looking, but he was also just a little bit…odd.  I couldn’t put my finger on it, but I knew it was there.  Not really in a sinister way, just a somewhat out of place way.   Like, he seemed a little “lost”.  I noticed that his concerned or anxious expressions were always quickly followed by a sort of confused look.  Like he was unsure of what he was thinking or feeling.  I patted his hand, reassuringly, and said,

“I’m okay.  It passed.  I have this condition, you see.  Not exactly a heart condition, but my heart is affected by it.  When I start to feel extreme stress or anxiety, my heart starts beating super fast, and I forget to breathe properly, somewhat like hyperventilating…and I usually pass out.  Sorry.  I’m usually much better at controlling it.  So, where did you come from anyway?  There wasn’t anyone on the road when I turned into it.  Then, suddenly, BAM!  There you were.”

Jeremy looked a little uncomfortable for a moment, then replied,

“I was just out for a walk.  I didn’t see you either at first, just wasn’t really paying attention, I suppose.  I get like that when I’m wandering.  Sorry.”

“Well, you don’t have to be sorry “, I said.  “I HIT YOU!” 

I laughed a little.  He chuckled softly.  It was a magical sound.  Sort of hollow, like a sea shell.  And, I was staring again.  Stop that!  He grinned for a moment, then picked up his glass and slowly drained it.  Placing it back on the counter, he stood up and said,

“Well, Allison.  It’s been a distinct pleasure to meet you, but I think maybe you should get some rest.  And, I should be going.  Thank you for an interesting evening.   I’m sure we’ll see each other again…soon.”

As I walked him to the door, and watched him walk back down the driveway, I felt a strange, stabbing sadness to see him go.  That’s weird.  I just met the guy.  Weird night.  I needed sleep. 

I let the dogs in, locked the doors and turned out the lights downstairs.  Then headed upstairs to get ready for bed, thinking ‘Thank god it’s Friday.’  While I was brushing my teeth, I couldn’t stop thinking about how he hadn’t been injured at all.  Maybe adrenaline took over for him, and he just didn’t seem to have any visible injuries.  I kept replaying it over and over in my head.  I could almost clearly see his forehead hit the hood, before he shot about 4 feet in front of the car.  I did not imagine this.  And where had he come from anyway?  When I turned there was no one walking there.  Then, I wondered if he lives on this road.  Maybe I’ll see him again tomorrow.  I cleaned my face, then made my way to the spare bedroom I always slept in.  The bed was high, four poster, with pretty gauzy material hanging from the posts.  A very girly room, the previous owners must have done that.  I think he said they abandoned it, or something.  I got in my boxer shorts and tank top, and slid between the cool, clean cotton sheets.  Still contemplating Jeremy’s seemingly miraculous brush with death, I drifted off into a deep, dream-filled sleep with one final thought:  Where the hell had he come from?

 

Sunlight streamed in through the white cotton curtains that seemed to hang from almost every available window in the house.  I lay quietly, refusing to open my eyes to the onslaught.  Then, finally giving in to curiosity, I rolled over to check the clock on the bedside table.  Seven-thirty?  Really?  Why am I awake so early on a Saturday?  I got up slowly, dragged myself over to the window and drew the shade down.  Then, dove back under the blanket.  The air conditioning had been on full blast when I came upstairs to go to bed.  I usually turn it down about half way, but I was feeling rather flushed, so I left it.  It made the morning deliciously chilly enough to snuggle comfortably under the blankets and drift back to dreamland for a few more hours. 

When I opened my eyes again, there was a large, wet nose pushing into my face.  Immediately followed by an equally wet tongue repeatedly slapping my cheek.  The bed was crawling with large, whining dogs.  Reluctantly I slid off the side of the bed, and pulled my favourite pink hoodie from the chair where I’d tossed it.  I snapped my fingers,

“Alright, ladies…who wants to go outside?”

The two bull mastiffs all but tripped over each other bounding off the bed, then nearly knocked me down the stairs in their haste to make it to the back door first.  I let them out, then headed for the fridge, intent on pouring myself some juice.  Sitting at the counter, hands wrapped around my giant mug of juice, I had almost convinced myself that I had had the strangest, most vivid dream last night.  Then, there was a knock at the door.  I glanced at the clock on the microwave �" ten o’clock.  No one ever knocks on Darren’s door.  Quietly I made my to the small window alongside the door, fully expecting to see Jehovah’s Witness or LDS, and was fully shocked to recognize the guy I dreamed I hit last night!  I yanked the door open, and stood there spellbound for a few embarrassing seconds, then realized I was still in my pajamas and somewhat hid myself behind the door.  He smiled that slow, shy smile, and said,

“Hi!  I went for a coffee, and thought I’d grab something for you.  As a thank you, for last night.”

“You wanted to thank me for hitting you?”

I giggled softly, and felt my left eyebrow raise.  He flushed, then laughed, too.

“Um, no.  Sorry, what I meant was more of an apology for scaring you.   I’m…sorry.”

I rolled my eyes, not really believing he was apologizing, again, for being hit by my car.  Motioning for him to come inside, I replied,

“Really, Jeremy, you can’t continuously apologize for me hitting you.  Even if, miraculously, there isn’t a scratch on you.  Let’s make a deal.  No harm done, apparently, so let’s just forget it.  Start over?” 

His face lit up, he grinned a relieved grin, and wandered into the kitchen.  I sat down on a barstool, and tried to covertly watch him drinking his coffee.  His hair was not as dark in the daylight, actually a nice chocolaty brown.  Eyes to match, but they had a really striking burnished gold around the iris.  He had some stubble on his face, as if he hadn’t shaved in a few days.  I suddenly longed to run my hand over the rough bristles.  Whoa!  Where did that come from?  I have a real thing for facial hair.  He had a slim, but somewhat athletic build, tall.  Taller than me, anyway, and I’m not more than five-foot-six.  His smile was really intoxicating.  Especially the shy way he was looking at me now.  Jolted back to reality, I realized he was giving me a somewhat c**k-eyed grin.  I blushed. 

“Sorry.  Didn’t realize I was staring.  I’m still a little asleep.”

Which is about the time I realized I had actually, quite literally, just fallen out of bed!  I couldn’t even imagine what I must look like.  Hair everywhere, no makeup, pajamas…yikes!

“That’s ok, “  he said.  “I was just thinking that it isn’t really fair that you just fell out of bed looking that beautiful.”

I think my mouth actually fell open.  Well, that’s not lady-like.  I was sort of taken aback.  But, the really unsettling part was I wasn’t really sure which was freaking me out more: that he thought I was beautiful, or that he seemed to have actually responded to what I was just thinking. 

He reached over and gently pulled my chin up, closing my mouth, then smiling said,

“You’re staring again…”

I shook my head quickly,

“So, I’ve been over and over it in my head and I just can’t figure something out.”

Jeremy took a long swig of his coffee, eyebrows raised, then said,

“Oh?  What is that?”

“Where the hell did you come from?”

He choked and started coughing wildy.  Alarmed, I grabbed his arms and pulled them up over his head,

“Slow down, Jeremy.  Slow your breathing.  Stop trying to breathe while you cough.   SLOW.”

I let his arms down slowly, then put my hand on his back.  And, I felt it again.   That strange, jolt.  I know he felt it too, because he seemed to sort of stiffen, then sat up and said,

“Thank you, again.  I’m ok, I think.  I think I inhaled when I should have swallowed.  What made you ask that?”

I was puzzled for a moment, struggling to remember exactly what he was talking about.  Then, remembering, I said,

“Where you came from?  I just can’t figure out how I hit you last night.  When I turned you weren’t there…I know it.”

He gave a tight smile then,

“I could have sworn we just decided to forget about this and start over…”

“You keep doing that.”

“Doing what?”

“Dodging that question.  You did it last night, too. “

“I don’t think I did.  I told you I was out for a walk.”  

Jeremy crossed his arms over his chest, and narrowed his eyes, a small smile played on his lips.  I was at once somewhat aroused and annoyed at this answer.  Why does he keep redirecting me?  Then he said,

“Allison, did you hit your head when we collided?  Maybe you hit your head on the steering wheel?  I have heard of people having concussions from that.  It’s not uncommon in a front-impact collision.”

I leveled him with an irritated scowl,

“I ‘collided’ with a human being.  I don’t think that really counts.  Regardless how completely intact and unharmed you may be today, you are not made of stone, or hard enough to have caused my car to have any kind of damage, the car itself absorbed  the majority of the ‘collision’.  This is funny?“

He was chuckling, light dancing in his eyes.  This only infuriated me.  Seeing my fury written on my face, he immediately became contrite and apologized,

“Oh, Allison, I’m not laughing at you.  Sorry.  You’re just incredibly fascinating when you are annoyed.  I love it.  The fury absolutely blossoms in your cheeks and eyes.   Very engaging.”

“Did you just…are you saying I’m ‘cute when I’m angry’?  Seriously?”

His face fell a bit, his eyes became serious, and he responded,

“Oh, no.  I didn’t mean to offend.  It was a compliment, really.  Please take it as such.  I am feeling most upset that I may have caused you to become displeased with me. “

His speech was taking on a strange cadence and pattern.  Almost foreign, though I couldn’t detect an accent.   I narrowed my eyes at him, smirking,

“Well…I…okay.  So, what are you up to today?”

Jeremy grinned over his coffee, briefly, then looking over at me, said,

“I’m actually completely free today.  I’ve never been here before.   I wonder if you would agree to be my companion today?  What are your plans?”

His face took on a very boyish look, excited and somewhat shy and embarrassed at the same time.  Suddenly, my phone buzzed loudly from the counter where I’d left it the night before.   I hesitated to grab it right away, and be rude.  But I knew it was Cara, and I knew that she would just keep texting until I answered.   Smilingly apologetically, I reached for it, pressing the button.  I had three missed texts…all from Carrie:

Uhh…hi?   Thought U were going 2 call me when you got there!? 

Allie?  Are U alive?  Don’t make me come over there! :p

The last was from this morning:

If I don’t hear back from U in 20 min I’m coming over there…

I quickly texted her back:

Hey…sorry.  Met a cute guy.  He’s here now.  I may be hanging out with him today!  Call you later!

I dropped the phone quickly into my purse, blushing slightly.  When I looked back at Jeremy, he had that silly, adorable grin on his face again.  I was secretly beginning to think he was doing it specifically because he suspected it was making me crazy.  And he was so right. 

Monday morning dawned crisp and bright, and with it two realizations:  One �" it was a holiday, so I didn’t have to go to work.  And two, I was spending the day with Jeremy.   He had stayed fairly late the night before.  It was amazing how tempted I was to ask him to stay.  I am generally much more cautious and “lady-like” than that, but it seemed the more time I spent in his presence, the more unbearable it seemed the idea of his leaving.  I couldn’t explain it, really.  It wasn’t just the sexual attraction, although that was definitely one aspect.  There was something else.  Something I could never quite put my finger on.  Finally I decided to just revel in it, I didn’t often feel this way about a guy.  Why shouldn’t I enjoy myself? 

 

 

The next three months went by in an amazing, fun, luxuriously happy blur.  Jeremy and I were inseparable, almost literally.  I couldn’t seem to put my finger on it, but there was something about him that was just a bit…different.  The way he spoke?  The way he walked?  In the beginning, I tried not to let it overshadow us, but it always seemed to be there in the back of my mind.  He was so sweet, though.  Anytime I started to wonder about him, he would flash me that brilliant smile and I would forget all about it.  

Jeremy made me feel so happy and loved.  We had the most intense connection.  That initial jolt I kept feeling, it never went away.  Every time we touched, it was there.  I felt like I was floating.  Complete, in a way that I had never felt before.  And not just in that “sappy, love-sick teenager” way, it went deeper than that.  He seemed to fill that strange void I had always felt.  The longing I had always had to be loved and recognized, he seemed to feel it and revel in being the one to fix it.  Suddenly he was the sky…and I yearned for him. 

One Saturday morning, after we’d had our coffee, we were sitting around Jeremy’s apartment in our pajamas.  I was reading a book I’d picked up at the library.   He had been acting a bit strange all morning.  Just sort of…antsy.  Like he had something on his mind. 

We were sitting on the couch, my feet were in his lap as I read my book.  He was furiously working on his newest obsession: a Rubik’s cube.  Suddenly, he looked over at me and said,

“Hey, Allie?”

Without looking up from my book,

“Hmm?”

He paused for a moment, then,

“What is your earliest memory?”

Unsure of where he was going with this, I shrugged and replied,

“I don’t know.  When I was little, I guess.  Why?”

He was thoughtful for a moment, then,

“Are you sure?  Do you really remember your childhood, or do you just think you do, because you think you should?  Try to pinpoint a specific memory…tell me about it.”

With a tiny, playfully exasperated sigh, I laid my book in my lap, closed my eyes and tried to conjure up a clear memory.  And…was astounded to find that I couldn’t.  It seemed like I had several partial memory ideas, but nothing that I could really describe as “a memory”, like that I actually remembered happening.  I said,

“Well…I guess, I don’t really remember.  I think the earliest thing I can really remember, is graduating high school.  But, how is that possible?  That was just last summer.   I must be able to remember something from when I was younger.  I can remember sleepovers with Carrie…I think.  But, not clearly.  It’s sort of hazy. “

He waited, watching me come to this realization, a smile playing on his lips.  Not an unkind or malicious smile, more in understanding and sympathy.  Then, he leaned forward and wrapped one hand around the back of my neck, pulling me toward him.  His forehead met mine gingerly.   He gazed deeply into my eyes, and almost seemed to be searching.  I stared back for several seconds, then just as I was about to break the silence, he murmured,

“You know… this isn’t real, Allie?”

I continued to stare at him, waiting for him to explain this revelation.  He was quiet, though.  I smirked at him,
“What isn’t?”

He sighed and replied,

“All of it.  This place, this situation.  We are here, but here isn’t…here.  Wow, this is so much more difficult to explain than I thought it would be.  Have you ever felt like…you just…like you don’t…oh man!  I have wanted to say this to you since the moment we met.  And, now, I’m faltering.  Unbeleiveable.”

He laid his head back against the back of the couch, rubbing his face with both hands.  He was quiet for a few seconds.   Then all in one breath, he laid it on me,

“Haven’t you ever felt like you don’t belong here?  Like…you’re just waiting…for something?”

Slowly, I looked at him over the top of my book.   He was staring at me, intently, waiting for my answer.  I couldn’t really say why, but his gaze frightened me a little.  I could feel myself staring at him, my book momentarily forgotten.  I tried to swallow, suddenly acutely aware of the intense dryness of my mouth.  My eyes narrowed at him and I said,

“What are you talking about, Jeremy?  You’re kinda freaking me out.  You’ve been acting weird all morning.  Are you feeling okay?”

He gave me a reassuring smile, then slowly stroking my cheek, he tried again.

“Allie.  I want to tell you a story…paint you a picture, if you will.  Once upon a time, there was a boy…who lived for a girl.  She was the most amazing, beautiful being he had ever seen.  Inside and out.  They spent every waking moment together.  Nothing could come between them.  One day their world shifted, literally.  The heavens opened up and the people noticed that a rift had appeared and was swallowing time.  Some people were excited and drawn to the magnetic force of the rift.  They built monuments, and eventually built mass ships that sailed into the sky and were sucked into the void…with no way of knowing or predicting where it would lead.  Some were driven mad with the want of knowledge, driven to insane lengths just to find out what was on the other side.”

I couldn’t stop the look on my face, which I’m sure was extremely irritating, as it was covered with sympathy.  I feared that he may suddenly be experiencing the head trauma he should have had months ago.   He smiles, one which is equally irritating and condescending, then says,

“Just listen.   One of those who was driven mad, was a man named Kalen.  A scientific genius of their world, well known for leading the way in biogenetic research, as well as altering metaphysical planes.   He became obsessed with finding a way to get through the rift, and make it back.  No one has ever made it back…well, almost no one.”

He hesitated at this, unsure whether he should go on.  I indicated that he should, my eyes giving away my growing curiosity.  He did.

“The girl had grown increasingly curious about the rift.  She read on it, and talked to others incessantly.  Kalen was one of her teachers and had taken to encouraging her curiosity.  The boy pleaded with her to let it go, to once more be happy, as they had always been.  She grew irritated and restless.  The boy could see her pulling away from him.  He found out that she had begun to work with Kalen, even going so far as to travel to the rift.   Are you following me, Allie?”

I could feel the look on my face, but was unsure of what it meant, exactly.  For some reason, this story sounded incredibly familiar to me.  While at the same time, sounding terribly alien.  I could tell that speaking of the girl was difficult for him.  His face shown with desperation.  Taking my face in his hands, he stared into my eyes, searching, pleading,

“You have to remember, Allie.  You have to try.  There isn’t much time before I have to…”

Right then, I felt a little overwhelmed.  I leaned forward and licked his lower lip, effectively silencing him.  He stared at me for a moment, his face bathed in pure, unadulterated joy.  Just drinking in my face, his fingers toying with the ends of my hair.  Closing the gap between us, he pressed his warm, soft lips to mine, lingering there for several seconds…rubbing his nose against mine, a tiny smile playing on his lips.  I climbed over to straddle his lap, my eyes never leaving his, and pressed my hands gently against his soft, naked chest.  The hair there felt soft and downy under my palms, his skin seemed almost to glow where I touched him.  He kissed me fiercely then, his hands cupping my face, pulling me down to him while pressing himself against me.  My heart beat wildly in my chest, I started to swoon a bit.  Then, Jeremy’s soft voice whispered against my right ear,

“Breathe, Allie….slow it down…and breathe.”

Momentarily breathless, I could feel my heart behaving already, as if it answered to him.  Slowly, he took the bottom of my shirt in his hands and lifted it up over my head, tossing it to the floor.  His eyes took in my bared breasts hungrily, suddenly the gold around the irises burned brightly with desire. 

He leaned forward and gently lapped at the n****e on my left breast, before taking it into his mouth.  I moaned softly, loving the feel of his mouth on my skin.  I cupped the back of his head, tugging gently at the hair at the nape of his neck, holding him close.  My head fell back, sending long, loose ruby locks tumbling down my back. 

Suddenly, Jeremy turned and stood, as I wrapped my legs tightly around him.  He cupped my thighs and behind, kissing me feverishly, our tongues fully engaged in their own wild mating ritual.  He carried me into the bedroom and pushed the door closed with his foot.  Lowering me onto the bed, his eyes never leaving mine, he whispered,

“I will love you until the end of time, my Allie…”

Later, I lay beside him, basking in a thoroughly blissful post-coital embrace.  My mind just didn’t seem to want to relax into sleep just yet.  I couldn’t seem to let go of what he had been saying earlier. 

“You have to remember, Allie.  You have to try.  There isn’t much time before I have to…” 

He never did finish that thought.  It still haunts me. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’m at work, on my cell phone again.  I’ve been waiting for Jeremy to call me back, for almost three days.  Trying to maintain my cool, calm outer shell, but it’s starting to crack from the inside.  Irritation has given way to anger, which has in turn given way to all out worry.  In the three months we’ve been ‘seeing each other’, he has never taken more than about 10 minutes to call or at least text me back.  I stare intently at the phone in my hand, willing it buzz.  Nothing.  Hesitantly, I dial the number again.  It rings once…twice….three times…four. 

“It’s Jeremy….BEEEP!”

I hang up, worrying more by the minute.  I punch in the number for Cara’s phone.  She answers immediately,

“Anything?”

I smile a little, knowing she is worrying for me.  Sighing loudly into the phone, I feel like I may just start crying if I speak, but I can’t just sit here and not speak…I called her.

“No.  I don’t know what else to do, Care.  I don’t even know where he is.   He’s not at the apartment.  He’s not calling back.”

“Does he have any relatives?”

“No…I don’t know.”

“Where does he work?”

“Ummm…I ….I don’t know.”

“Okay…exactly what DO you know about him, Allie?”

I didn’t know what to say.  She wasn’t trying to be blunt and pissy, I knew.  She was absolutely right, as usual, and  yet, I was somewhat stunned that hear it put that way.  How is it possible that we’d been together almost non-stop for three months and I still knew next to nothing about him.  My mind suddenly  began furiously compiling information:

His favorite color?  Green

His eye color?  Brown…chocolatey brown…with that beautiful gold thing around…stop it.

He likes chocolate ice cream, with cherry sauce.

He hates marshmallows…

He loves coffee…lots of cream, lots of sugar. 

Does he have a driver’s license?  A family somewhere?  A library card?  A visitor’s visa?!  Seriously…where the hell did he come from?

I snapped back to the sound of Cara’s agitated voice,

“Hello?  Allie?  Still on the phone here, focus, please!”

“Sorry, Care.  Was just thinking.  I’ve got to get back to work.  Starting to get looks from Jay, and we just don’t want to go there.  I’ll head back out to Darren’s house after I get off.  That’s the first place I ever saw him.  Maybe for some reason he’s gone back there.  I’ll text you if I find anything.  Thanks!”

I pushed the button and dropped my phone back into my purse.  I tried to work for the next few hours, but didn’t end up getting much done.

When I finally got in the car, it was well after four o’clock.  I buckled myself in and put the music on, then pulled out of the parking lot and made my way through town.  My mind was racing, as I tried to recall anything Jeremy had said that might be some kind of clue.  Again and again I came up with nothing.

I pulled into the parking lot of his apartment building about thirty minutes later.  I just wanted to check the apartment one last time, maybe I’d missed something.  Some clue as to where he might have gone, someone else he might have known.  He had given me a key, reluctantly.  He said he didn’t want me hanging out there, as it “wasn’t safe”.  Another cryptic comment he wouldn’t really explain, but promised to one day soon.  I let myself in, and dropped my keys on the table, as had become my habit. 

Slowly, I looked around the tiny apartment.  It was nothing to write home about, really.  A small living/dining area, a tiny kitchen.  Then, a smallish bedroom with a small bathroom attached.  Very basic, and still felt more like home to me than my own house did.  I wandered into the bedroom, and sat forlorn on the edge of the bed.  It was getting a bit dark out, and rather than turn on the light, I got up and went to step around the bed to open the blind on the window.  And I would have tripped right over him, if he hadn’t moaned just then.  Horrified, I jerked the blind open, and twilight flooded the dim room.  A gasp escaped his lips as the light hit his eyes, then they closed tight, as he moaned once more.  He was wrapped in a blanket he’d pulled from the end of the bed.  I’d folded it there myself about a week before.  I dropped to my knees, to peer into his face.  It was slick with sweat, and had a slightly grayish tint.  He looked like death, and couldn’t seem to stop shivering, or stay fully alert.  I put my hand to his forehead.  He was burning with fever. 

“Oh my god, Jeremy…what is happening?  You are burning up.  How long have you been in here?  I came by two days ago, and you weren’t here.  I’m going to call an ambulance…”   He seemed to wake then, grabbing wildly at my arm, his green eyes wide with fear. 

“No!  No, Allie.  No hospitals…no doctors.  Wouldn’t…understand.  Just…stay with me, Allie.  Please.”

I watched him, considering for a moment.   He seemed a bit delirious.  I’m not a doctor, I had no idea what was wrong, or what to do.  But, I did know, generally, what to do for a fever.  If it didn’t work, he would go to the hospital if I had to carry him there myself.

“Ok, Jeremy.  Ok.  Relax.  No hospital.  No doctors.  I will try to help, in whatever way I can.  But if what I know doesn’t help, promise me you’ll at least consider seeing a doctor.”

Grimly, he gave a slight nod of consent…then drifted back in unconsciousness.  I pulled the blanket off him, and half dragged him into the bed.  I took his jacket, clothes and shoes off, and helped him into some clean pyjamas.  I knew there was a pharmacy a few blocks from the apartment, so I tucked the sheet lightly around him and headed out with a quick promise to return quickly. 

The pharmacy was closer than I thought.  The pharmacist was quite helpful as well.  He told me that in case of a very high fever, the first thing to try was medicine.  Acetaminophen first, then I could give Ibuprofen as well if needed.   If medication didn’t begin to bring it down within an hour, I had to get him into a lukewarm bath.  If that didn’t help, or the fever kept going up, I had to get him to a hospital right away.  I thanked him profusely, and headed back out with my purchases. 

Jeremy was much the way I’d left him, only he’d worked his way out from under the sheet while trying to keep from vomiting in the bed.  I was glad I had thought to buy a gingerale at the pharmacy, just in case.  He had been sweating a lot, and was likely a bit dehydrated.  I helped him out of the bed, and led him to a chair just inside the door of the room.  While he sat, trying not to vomit, I changed the sheets and got the trashcan from the bathroom to put beside the bed.  I went to the kitchen for a cup and poured him a small amount of gingerale, then opened the bottle of Acetaminophen, shaking two out into my hand.  When I got back to the bedroom he was fetal, and back in the bed.  I half dragged him into a sitting position and handed him the cup.

“Ok, Jeremy, you need to sip this.  Slowly.  If you drink too quickly, you’ll just puke it back up.”

He did as he was told, his hands wrapped weakly around the cup.  After he had a few sips, I took his hand and dropped the tablets into his palm.   He stared at them for a moment, then his eyes shifted to me with a slightly weary, confused look.

“What do I do with this?”  he asked.

I rolled my eyes, but played along,

“You put them in your mouth,  genius.  They’re pills.  Acetaminophen.  Just take it…should help bring the fever down.”

He looked back at the pills, gave a tiny shrug, popped them into his mouth and started to chew.  His face instantly screwed up, and he began to gag.  I grabbed the trashcan just in time.  I stared at him, with what must have been a shocked expression, for I was a bit shocked.  He didn’t know what pills were?  Is that even possible?   I went back to the kitchen for two more tablets and brought them back to him. 

“What the hell, Jeremy?  You chewed them?  Seriously?  Quit screwing around and swallow the damn things.  I’m pretty sure you have a nasty flu.”

He didn’t look up again, “A what?”

He took the two new pills, put them in his mouth and took a drink of the gingerale.  Then, with some effort was able to figure out how to swallow them with the liquid.

“The Flu.  As in Influenza.  A bug?  A virus? 

He let himself fall back onto the bed, and once more resumed his fetal position.  His eyes closed and was still for a while then said, quietly,

“What’s a virus?”

I wasn’t sure how to respond at first.  A part of my mind chose to believe that he must be delirious from the fever.  But, an increasingly larger part, knew that he genuinely didn’t know what a virus was…because there was something off about him.  I could feel the different parts of my brain warring with each other, the more rational side insisting that I was being ridiculous and should just nurse him back to health.  The more fantastical, imaginative side refused to give up the idea that Jeremy might just be “not from around here”.  Finally, I decided to just bite the bullet and find out.  I scooted around to cradle his fevered head in my lap, running my fingers gently through his hair. 

“Jeremy?”  I said.

He moaned a bit in response. 

“You’re not from here…are you?”

His body, which had been shivering, suddenly froze.  Then, seemed to relax, ever so slightly. 

He said, quietly, “No.”

“Can you tell me about it?”  I asked.

Exhausted, he replied, “I can try.”

He reached for the glass of gingerale, took a long, slow sip and replaced it on the table.  Then, taking a deep breath, he began,

“It’s beautiful there.  Twin suns shine down on us for three cycles at a time, and during that time everything is in full bloom.  But they are much further from us than Earth’s sun.  It is rarely, if ever, very hot.  Almost always quite warm and temperate.  Water is plentiful, it flows from natural springs.  It is always cool, and clean.  There is no such thing as ‘viruses’.   We do not get sick, Allie.  We have no need of medicines.  Until now.  When the rift opened, things began to come through that…well, things we’d never seen.  People began to develop strange ailments.  We didn’t know what to do.  Our bodies have a natural healing ability.  But, something came through that seemed to be immune to us.   After a while, a few people died.  That’s when the panic started.  And I went into the rift…to find you.”

I couldn’t move.  Slowly he eased himself onto his back, and looked up at me, his dark green eyes gazing deeply into mine.  He took my hand into his, and said gently,

“Breathe, Allie…”

Realizing that a gasp had caught in my throat, I took a ragged breath.  No matter how absurd it sounded, I could not deny that what he had said seemed to have a ring of truth to it.  It seemed…almost familiar somehow.    I swallowed the lump that had formed in my throat and whispered,

“…because, I am also…from there?”

He nodded very slowly.  I suddenly felt very cold, all over.  And, also, curiously at ease.  Many things started to make some sense.  My mind was racing, recalling things from my past, from my childhood, that had never really added up.  My parents’ apparent lack of parental instincts, and my inane ability to thrive anyway.  I had never been sick.  Never.  Never had the chickenpox, or even a cold.  Or any of the other ailments that commonly plague children.  I suppose at the time, my parents were just thrilled that I never needed any kind of medical care, they never thought to question.  Neither did I.  Until now.

I looked back down at him.  He had fallen asleep once more.  His beautiful face tilted halfway toward my belly, his mouth was slack.   I didn’t want to wake him, so I gently held his head while I worked myself into a lying position beside him.  His gentle, even breathing lulled me to sleep, snuggled into his side. 

 

The next day dawned bright and warm, the little room already beginning to get a bit sticky.  I realized Jeremy had rolled away from me as we slept, and from the back of his shirt I could see that his fever had broken, as it was drenched with sweat.  I managed to work the shirt up over his head, and pulled the sheet up to his waist.  I got up to flip the switch on the wall, and watched the ceiling fan begin to turn in lazy circles above.  Quietly, I slipped into the living room and picked up the phone to call in sick to work.  Erin answered and let me know that Darren wouldn’t be in either, so it worked out perfectly.     

Then, I called Carrie-Anne.  I had texted her before I nodded off the night before, but she would be worried still.  She answered, somewhat sleepily,

“Hello?”

“Morning, Care.  Did I wake you?  You’re usually at work by now…”

“Not on the schedule today, turns out.  How’s the sickie?”

“He’s ok.  Fever broke, at least.  Still asleep, though.  Don’t think he’s thrown up any more.  Hopefully on the mend.” 

Jeremy moaned lightly and rolled toward me, eyes slit.  I gave a cheery little wave.  He gave a half-hearted grin and closed his eyes.  I giggled and said my goodbyes to Carrie, then snuggled up next to him, rubbing my face on his face.  He smiled a big smile, then. 

“I SO love waking up to you, Allie.  It is something I have sorely missed,” he said, wrapping his arms around me and burying his face in my hair.  We lay, quietly, like that for almost an hour.  Then, with a sigh, I slithered out of his embrace and headed for the bathroom.

“Where are you going?” he pouted.

“Gotta pee.  And shower.  We stink, my love.” 

He laughed, and slowly sat up.  I watched him before letting the door close behind me.

    

 

 

 

   

Author's Note

Please note - this is VERY much a work in progress. Please forgive any large "holes", as I tend to write as I think of it...and that is rarely in order. LOL Thanks!