The Rainbow Diary - Tentative first chapter

I am working on a book titled "The Rainbow Diary". After writing and rewriting many versions of chapters and scenes, I found this one to really shift the original tone of the story right away.

Everyone has a story.

            Some may be dark, emotional or hilarious and others may just be the same cookie cutter tale with a different lead �" then there are the stories that need to be told.

            This is one of them �" and I believe that it is my personal responsibility to be the one to tell it. To do so however; I would need to expose not only the darkness and unfavourable actions of those involved, but the darkness in myself; that side of me that I either couldn’t see before or I never wanted to see, the side that allowed me to become so vulnerable that I would even consider suicide, the side that changed not only my life, but the lives of each end every person to come into contact with me while my dark side was running rampant, like some small town Mr. Hyde �" leaving nothing but destruction and despair in his wake.  

            That same side, the one that threw the small and repetitive world of Willow Creek onto its axis, is still here. It’s the voice in my head telling me that it was all my fault, that none of this would have happened had it not been for me �" the voice that whispers so seductively into my ear to pick up that razor blade again, press it into the already scarred flesh of my forearm and finish what I had been to f*****g cowardly to finish the first time.

            I shouldn’t blame myself, that’s what Dr. King said. He suggested that I keep a diary of sorts so that even if I don’t feel like talking to anyone around me, I can still get my feelings out. But I have a different plan, I intend to use it to live out the past year, starting from the day when everything changed. You may think that this is the dumbest, most self destructive idea that someone could ever have, especially in my condition �" but as a writer, I have no issue in asking what is writing besides bringing forth every horror that dwells in the back of your mind?

            However, this could also be self preservation. If by living through everything I’ve faced this year from a writer’s perspective instead of the leading role, maybe I can finally show myself that I’m not the one responsible.

            As they say, what have you got to lose? And I can honestly say, as I sit in my bedroom alone �" as I have been doing for the past six weeks �" that I have absolutely nothing to lose.

            Our story begins one year ago in the god forsaken town of Willow Creek.

 

Author's Note

still without much editing, so ignore grammar issues. What kind of feel did you get for the character?

Reviews

[Icezland]

LOVE IT!!:D Continue please

[Riding the Rainbow]

I'm not the one who cares about grammar..
Very conflicted character and I TOTALLY want to read more;)