Getting Better.

I thought I was getting better

But now I am drunk enough to let go of my pain

I really wish I could let go of my tears

I will never let my feelings show

To hell with me

You're all I want

I thought we were having a thing

But now I know it was all just a dream of mine

It meant nothing to you

I want to cry tonight, nothing seem to be right, I am so devastated

You knew how I felt about you, and how I feel

I lost my self-control

To hell with my heart

I just want to cry

I want to scream my lungs out

Please give me the broken glass

I need to see it slice my veins open

To see the blood run down my arm

Please let me go

Free me from this hell..

Author's Note

Ignore Grammar Problems.
Honest Opinion As Always.

Reviews

[knightcall]

getting better all the time. getting bettttter

[Calypso]

Scary

[Thea]

Oh no, I felt a lot of emotions here...Great work!!! :')))

[...AnGeLzLoVe...]

WOW!!!! I almost started crying!! This is such a powerful poem!! It says so much!! wow... Speechless!! Well done!!

[Sukriti Suki]

Reading this made me feel like I was prying...maybe hearing your thoughts meant for someone close.....But this is the greatest thing about poetry...we write for whatever reason we have....and this time it is to take out the pain and you do it very well. If it is the 'pen' that solves the problem and takes you away from the knife, our purpose here is nearly solved.

[Gilbert Saint]

I have to ask this again,why do people prefer to make poetry so obvious. Its poetry! its not supposed to be that obvious. Try writing the poem from a second person perspective like:
A story is told of a damsel in distress,
Her loved one, her he would not caress, her feelings he cared less,
How did she get into this mess, her heart she learnt to detest,
Why is love such a contest? She asked an air hostess,
As she flew away in the breeze, she gave all her love, but still he brought her contempt.

Hope that shed a bit of light on waht i meant. Otherwise, thumbs up heroine.

[ivizarx]

lol, I'm with the writer's note, grammar = bull, we don't need dat sh** lol :p
all jokes aside though, you have wrote and compacted lots of emotion into a poem here. It hits pretty hard, makes you feel the feeling actually through all the descriptions. Though not really my thing, suicide advocation, depression, etc. you've very well excelled at writing about them, of course we should all excel at the describing the problems in our everyday lives, but you've done it to a terrific point.
As for CC (constructive criticism), maybe focus a lil more on going for metaphorical wordplay, just give it a lil try is the suggestion. lots of description plus relations to the things your talking seems like something you'll be good at and really propel your writing. say (example) "see it slice my veins open, like a slaughtered lamb's throat, a ocean of red to the flow, here I lay forever no more." lol well that's an attempt anyways, not a preferred edit...
But, really enjoyed your poetic stance, form, writing, and all. It was truly a great read. Oh, and take any thing I say with a grain of salt, and no worries, you're truly a splendid writer.

[Becky C Strukamp]

Such a powerful poem packed with emotions after emotions...I feel the pain and sadness..it engulfs me as I read it..

Free me from this hell... speaks volume here. My interpretation of that would be ...the only person who can free you of this is Yourself. I would love to see a poem from you of breaking free from the pain and suffering...i think you would really be able to do a poem of this type justice..one who suffers so much ...knows how horrific it is when they begin to see how good it can be...Feel the happiness that comes with letting go...hope to see some real soon...very passionate poem.

[Coyote Poetry]

Don't need blood. Need to write down your thoughts. A lot of emotion in your words. Sometime freedom from memory take time and something new to replace. Thank you for a excellent poem.
Coyote

[CharlesMonroe]

Scream, I dare you to scream as loud as you can, for as long as you can. Scream and cry, as loud as you can. It will help. Let go of all of the feelings, just let o=it all out...