The Performance Of Death.

You're Falling in the total darkness
no lights just a pair of red eyes
watching you fall
deeper and deeper.


The red eyes
looking at your soul
sends chills down your back
as you fall.


The Death's dressed in black
the evil Im your body
Waiting to break out
waiting for your hopeless wish of dying.


"Take my life and I'll feel okay"
The Death gives you glims of
what you'll Im through.
you won't get outalive.


His footsteps fires a purble fire
burns you badly
"show me your fear"
his eyes on fire
a blood red fire.


As He walks towards you
he's setting the ground on fire
a purble fire.


Don't show him any of your fears
if you do, you won't get out alive.

Author's Note

Ignore Grammar Problems Please.
Honest Opinion.

Reviews

[FallenHeroXx]

This is really good.. I like it a lot :)
Good job babe :)
I love you :D

Fallen

[iamkim]

this is a nice piece of expressing what you feel. you got me here! the flow is nice and so the thought of the poem. I love it!

[M.Babu]

This was good but it could be way better. I agree with Silent Scream.
However i shouldn't leave out the good points of the piece...
His footsteps fires a purble fire
burns you badly
"show me your fear"
his eyes on fire
a blood red fire.
I really enjoyed this stanza. It had a musical sort of flow to it. Very good job with this.

[falling_toxic_rain]

I thunk this is good, has nice flow:)

[Dream Weaver]

I thought this was really good but I think
you might be holding back some..Let it loose
try removing some of "the's" in the second
and third stanzas Example: The red eyes to
just (Red eyes) and "The Death's" to just plain (Death
dressed in black) But overall a very good poem...