Comatose (Chpt 3) Ruinous Reminiscence

In this chapter, the reader which is you sees someone who makes you remember bad memories.

I had a feeling in my gut that I will be here forever, all because of a drunk driving accident, that could have easily been avoided. I felt terrible, angry and full of hatred towards myself. I belong here to suffer in my consequences, in my own selfish stupidity. I fell to my knees in distress and misfortune. I didn't care about my life anymore. I deserve to die. I deserve to incinerate. If there was any way I could go back to that night and think about not going behind the wheel when drunk. 

I kept walking with shaky legs through this abyss. My ears filled with screams, and my eyes filled with stinging tears,  My stomach churned as I saw intestines strewn around. There were bodies that I have been dismembered and hanged. Their eyes were scratched out and their teeth were pulled out roughly. 

I kept walking, as I could hear a familiar voice that sounded like my brother.  I walked a bit faster to see my older brother, screaming and crying at the entity that was about to hang him.  What did he do to be down here? I thought about all the things he did. Then, it hit me, I remember the time he told me that he poisoned girlfriend and disemboweled her after a big fight because he saw her in bed with his friend. He lost his mind and went into a rage.  Of course, though, I didn't believe him. I didn't want to...I mean..who would?  The police came to the house, the day after he told me. My brother opened the door and was arrested on the spot. He went to court and was found guilty. He was sentenced to death by electrocution.  He died October 7th, 2001. 

I went up to my brother who had a noose around his neck. I just shook my head and cried. I told him, all this could have been avoided. Just like my drunk driving, could have been avoided.  We could both still be alive and doing right, instead of f*****g up.