That's when

If the heart begins to crumble
Under the concealed pain,
And the tears give up on abating it;
That's when you know that the slight cracks in your walls
Have started to widen.
And soon those walls that you built
Will come crashing down,
And the shattered pieces of the heart
Will scatter everywhere.
That's when you will see
Who is loyal enough to put their efforts
Into picking up those pieces
And putting them together.
That's when you will see
Who cares about you more
Than the wounds the sharp edges of your heart could cause.

Author's Note

Umm this wasn't actually supposed to be a poem, but I turned it into one anyways. Please review what you think about it :)

Reviews

[KAREN]

This is beautifully penned! Even though the poem is sad it flows with ease.

[Richard🖌]

Anaya,
How interesting my first review of you turns out to be a Free Verse poem by mistake … LOL!
Maybe, consider breaking the longer lines to fit the rest, but great enjambment and line breaks highlight the smooth, easy, consistent flow of this piece, tugging the reader right into your sad and tender moments with you, making him feel your every emotion as though it were his own … the hallmark of a skilled writer.

Thank you, Dear Poetess!
Who said there is no beauty in sadness?
Big hug! ⁓ Richard : )

[AnayaJ.]

Hahaha thanks for your kind words! I'm not really into writing poetries, this was one of my very first works. :D

[Richard🖌]

Ah, well our loss, but thank you, anyway, for this one, Anaya! ✨

[AnayaJ.]

No problem! Hopefully my short stories will be just as satisfactory :)

[M.A.]

This is a great piece, i could feel the sorrow and towards the end the love of others in this. The last line drives this piece home for me. The only critique i have is when you used scattered back to back. I was always told to play around with words and to try to not use the same words close together. Other than that thank you for sharing this lovely piece.

[AnayaJ.]

Oh I meant to write 'shattered' . I had written it before and I just copy pasted it. Didn't check for mistakes. Thanks for pointing out :)

[maria ( rose)]

absolutely fabulous! There is no other way to describe this poem. Part of the journey in life is slipping and falling along the way; and then you will see who is there for you & who will pick you up and dust you off..Thank You for sharing your thoughts with us. SUPERB WRITING!

[AnayaJ.]

Thankyou! :)

[maria ( rose)]

you are welcome!!! :)

[Robert Haigh]

Nicely articulated. The last line (with its imagery) adds power to the whole poem.

[AnayaJ.]

Thankyou! 😊

[matrixmark]

A good poem about who you're true friends really are. Very good use of words. Quite deep and very meaningful.

The only thing wrong is.....If the heart begins to crumple.......crumple should be crumble.

Keep writing, your work is good

[AnayaJ.]

Thanks for pointing out! I got confused between the two. Read my other works too. Thanks :)