Oh Doctor, Why?

I come to you, to seek your help.

You, and your white coat.

But every word I speak 

is easily dismissed.

I tell you, "I am sick."

You say, "It's in your head."

I weep from piercing pain,

that moves from the right to the middle;

the hunger that I cannot satisfy,

the long days and nights of emetophobia.

I gasp for air when I place food upon my tongue,

my throat closing, my stomach squeezing.

But I want to eat, I'm so hungry!

I say to you, "I am so sick."

You tell me, "It's in your head."

I toss and turn as the pain spreads,

moving across my back and behind my eyes.

I weep and weep,

the world growing so dark.

My skin feels like a million pins and needles,

the water that falls from the faucet

turns my skin purple and pink.

I can barely stand, swaying so weak.

I can barely bathe, crying as I wash myself.

I stumble through the house,

clutching every counter top and chair,

sinking onto the cold floor

just so I do not faint again and again.

I come to you,

You, in your white coat.

But every word I dare utter

is brushed aside.

I cry unto you, "I am getting sicker."

You smile with tight corners, "It's all in your head."

I have not left my bed in over a month.

I crawl around the house, weeping as I go.

I just want to eat. I want the pain to end.

I climb into a chair, and think of sustenance.

I riffle through my bare cabinets for something, anything

that I can stomach and keep down.

I place ice on my face and neck to numb my nerves,

I squeeze my eyes shut as the nausea grows.

And I crawl back into my bed,

wondering why no one will help me.

Here, I lie, my body shaking.

I am scared I will expire.

I am scared my blood pressure will plummet again,

and the seizures will start.

I take shallow breaths,

try to remain calm,

and drift into an hour of sleep a night.

Reviews

[KCthelastboyscout]

I know someone going through this exact same thing :) sometimes doctors aren't the best solution. Who knows your body better than you? Maybe there are better answers for you elsewhere