Rukhsat

I thought you would be the one to caught me when I fall... instead you're just another one pushing me over

Ahtiyat ab kya barte ke jaane bhi do ab,

Caarvaan chchordne ka lamha aa gaya..

 

 

Rukhsat aakhri bhi wo dene na aaye,

kaisa chahat ka ye falsafa aa gaya..

 

 

Shikwaa is baat ab zara bhi nahi,

Waqt guzra jo saath unke accha gaya..

 

 

Nashe se nahi par zaher se to hoga,

Haathon se jaam mere chalak sa gaya..

 

 

Saaye ne bhi to sang chalna chchoda hamare,

Jaise Naakami ka kaafila aa gaya..

 

 

Chand saansein bhi bojhal si lagne lagi,

Khud ki halat pe hamko rahem aa gaya..

 

 

Maayusi ki shehnaayi kyun baj gayi jab,

Unki galiyon se mera janaaja gaya !!

Author's Note

Here i am adding the english version of this poem just for the convenience of my readers

Translation :-
Now, it's no use taking precautions,
it's time to leave.

she didn't even come to say me a last goodbye,
see what is the outcome of my affection.

but no complaints from my side for that,
whatever time we had spent together was awesome.

better poison will make it easier, if alcohol cannot work,
see how wine spread from the brink of my glass.

even my own shadow has left me,
it's like the congregation of failure has arrived in my life.

life looks burdensome,
i am feeling pity for myself.

why someone had heard the funeral song,
when my final journey had gone through just beside her colony.

Reviews

[Ankita Dwivedi]

The hindi version brings the real feel of the poem with the tinge of some urdu words .i loved it , abhishek.
The departure hurts, but the sweet memories still, fill heart with nostalgia and longing .But we don't choose who we fall for .kuch log is qadar zindagi ka hissa ban jaate hai ,ki unke jaane par lagta hai ki zindagi hi nhi aap bhi khaali ho gye hai ..life goes on , and so it should ..Glad to finally find some hindi work here ..
-Ankita:)

[Abhishek Asthana]

Agreed with your views and thought process. I have written quite a few poems in hindi while i have plenty of ones but i do not share it here as only few readers are here who are having Hindi as their native language. Thanks for understanding the aura of the poem. I am glad you liked it. 

[Ankita Dwivedi]

i also, write a lot of hindi poems but i don't post here because the rhythm of the poem i feel is lost when u translate hindi into english or vice-versa.yeah , i really did like the work.:))

[Priyanshi]

both version are excellent but I loved these lines so much-
"better poison will make it easier, if alcohol cannot work,
see how wine spread from the brink of my glass."
This time I liked the middle lines more than last lines....hahaha...Keep it up.

[Abhishek Asthana]

that's so sweet of you but pay attention to the hindi-urdu version... i just translated it in a hurry for the sake of my readers who do not understand hindi... and that's great to know that this time you liked the first half of the poem... thanks a lot priyanshi :)

[Priyanshi]

I did pay attention too..though you did in hurry that too is as beautiful as hindi- urdu one.hahaha.

[Abhishek Asthana]

O.. then i am damn happy and yes, next time i'll work more on the last-half of the poem... hahaha... someday you would like the entire piece...

[Priyanshi]

Your poems are always entirely excellent... You don't need to work more....it's always good.... Keep it up.

[Surya]

Ohh...it's beautiful,...I enjoyed it in both versions...:)

[Abhishek Asthana]

i know you must have liked it... in fact you are trying your best in hindi-urdu poems... thanks a lot surya :)

[Sanskrity Mishra]

It's beautiful and quite emotional...keep up the good work :)

[Abhishek Asthana]

thanks so much sanskrity...i am just glad you liked it

[Sanskrity Mishra]

Your welcome :)

[Sofia]

It's beautiful in a way...even the English translation was gud...I like it..keep up the gud wrk!...This was wonderful..

[Abhishek Asthana]

thank you so much for your kind visit and words :)

[Sofia]

Pleasure is all mine..