Hopeless

circumstances, something that is really true, something that is sad...

Some undisplayable, there are few pains,,

all my efforts truly went in vain 

Some untold stories, there are which exist,,

feel that word "happiness" doesnot surface in my list

Victim say or looser, or whosoever m i ?

why misfortune follows me, just like a spy

Perhaps i was a bird, wanted to fly high,,

now think of eliminating whole world, or should i die

Neither fervour it is, nor any kind of curiosity,,

unlike mankind, centraling in ferocity

My childhood slipped from tilted broken slope,,

with every moment that goes,now i am loosing hope !!......

Reviews

[Im His Daughter]

I'd say don't do it, God won't let you slip, reach out to him. Thought provoking, as I too am not immune to thoughts of leaving either. Great write!

[Abhishek Asthana]

thanks a lot for your kind words...thank you for reading

[Wajiha Nayeem]

this is wow..i loved it and yes, this was a really good piece...

[Abhishek Asthana]

thank u so much wajiha,,, m happy u liked it

[Wajiha Nayeem]

my pleasure friend...

[Hope]

"why misfortune follows me, just like a spy"- I have always wondered and so did many people.
But I am not gonna lose hope...
Great work....:)

[Abhishek Asthana]

thanku for reading...

[Hope]

my pleasure...

[Lavi]

Nice Choice of words!
Dear,
Do not loose hope,
I'm a girl.I'm young at heart. I'm young in spirit, and I'm still adventurous.

[Abhishek Asthana]

i always try to learn and inspire myself... thank for reading... m glad u liked it

[Anjali]

That's exactly how I feel, right now. Truly loved this poem. Keep writing!😊

[Abhishek Asthana]

Thank you so much... glad to know it's relatable to you...but I only wish a lot of happines for you... One should not live in a state of despondency

[Anjali]

And I hope you stay happy, too. No one deserves to be sad.

[heartspeaks]

, there are WHICH exist,, or THERE EXIST...
with every moment THAT goes.

Just a few corrections i felt..hope you don't mind. no offence .You can change it only if you feel like.
now about the poem...Wow its to the point...The pain of struggle and entangling will power . I could totally relate to it... The way obstacles break our hope and how our confidence dissapears..

[Abhishek Asthana]

both r correct whether we add "which" nd "that" or not... well i'll go with ur suggestion...thank you very much...

[heartspeaks]

😊 glad.....

[Surya]

Survive when you lose hope, one fine morning may it gives you happiness..I liked it...:)

[Abhishek Asthana]

exactly... thats wat my object was.., thanks alot

[Farhan Shaikh]

Hope is important
Without hope we are a body without a soul..
No matter how much down you go..
Have a hope to rise again..
Wonderful poem..
Like this alot

[Abhishek Asthana]

thank u so much... m glad u liked it...

[TheAlphaOmega1123]

Hope is just an inferior way people deal with the real world. I do not believe in it.

[Abhishek Asthana]

Yups... this is time of most practical era that deal with real world... bt somewhere it's about the positive or negative vibration that lies inside...

[Ayush Mishra]

"with every moment goes,now i am loosing hope"...nope u should not !!

[Abhishek Asthana]

It seems u r bit sure that it's all about me... haha... thanks anyway !