Here

A Poem by 7h3fr34k

Here.

I’m right here in front of you

I have no motivation

No reason to live

Seek.

Just seek and you shall find the path

I am so confused

So lost inside my mind

Break.

Break free from these tormenting shackles

Can’t throw myself

Against these chains again

Fight.

Head up, fight the pain

Shrieks of agony as

Yet again the binds snap taut

Never.

Never ever surrender

Why did I just try again

What am I even doing

Always.

Always do your best

How? I don’t even know what my best is

I lack the tools to realize my full potential

Everything.

Everything will all work out in the end

Yay

When in God’s name does it end

Try.

All you have to do is try

Try WHAT?

Have you paid attention at all??

I don’t know what I’m doing

I’m so lost and scared and

Nothing ever works because

I’m so confused all the time

Always so caught up in my mind

That I escape through distractions

And then it just looks like I’m lazy

I don’t even know if I am or not

Can’t or won’t can’t or won’t

What do I want who am I

All these questions flying around

Do I care am I stoic

Can I feel am I numb

Mind is a blizzard

Where I try to settle down

It’s just hard when you can’t see

And it’s so cold it burns

The wind whipping you around

Tearing ideas from your hands

Beating you back into a cave

Where you can’t live at all

You just exist and sit and wish

Where there is no light

I’m frozen

Just waiting to die and

Just hoping I don’t

Stop.

Stop acting like you don’t know what to do

Stop pretending you don’t know what’s wrong

Stop playing like you’re the victim of yourself

Stop the façade I know you’re not you

Stop deceiving because I know who you are

Stop lying because you know you aren’t lazy

Stop imagining that something is wrong

Stop believing that the fear will never be beat

Stop.

And this time, believe in you.

Insane I think I can feel it

All around me deep inside me

This driving uncaring that doesn’t

Even begin to make any sense

I want so bad to get up and do nothing

To get out into this world and just sit there

To create and build and waste time

Everything makes so much sense to me

That I can’t understand a word of it

An outstanding mind useless

In the hands of confusion and immaturity

Find.

Find yourself

I don’t know how

I have to find a way

Run.

A day wasn’t worth it if you can’t fall asleep

Try so hard I wear out my mind

Try so differently that I don’t feel like

I’m just running in circles again

Something has to make sense

I am all I need I just have to find me

Get up and move just do now let go

GET RID OF THE FEAR I CAN FEEL IT RIGHT HERE

UNDERLYING UNDER THE SURFACE PULL IT UP

BARE IT THROW IT INTO THE LIGHT

NO LONGER SHALL IT DWELL IN THE NIGHT

AS THIS FEAR STARTS TO FIGHT

IN ITS UNDERHAND WAYS

ITS SUBSURFACE DISPLAYS

AND ITS ROCK HARDENED GAZE

I WILL STRUGGLE AGAIN

WITH RENEWED HOPE AND STRENGTH

AND A TWIST ON MY VIEW OF THOSE CHAINS

Fear.

Fear equals faIling without even trying

Try.

Try again differently

Believe.

I’m right here in front of you

Every time you look in the mirror