Fish Sticks & Bamboo Bones

Fish Sticks and Bamboo Bones

 

They sat, two sad lonely boys, without a care in the world for anything. They sat on that couch, one with his feet up, the other with his feet down. They sat on that couch, in that sombre living room, thinking. What they were thinking about is too complicated to explain at the moment. It takes a while for a person to give up on themselves; sometimes it comes quicker to one individual, rather than to another. But when it does come, it is rather vicious and fast to terminate its prey. Those two boys, both with feet up and feet down, had given up, thrown the ball away, shook their hands free of the dust and blood that had accumulated over the years. Giving up is a tragedy that most people try to avoid during their lives, but it always seems to find a way to penetrate the core of the human mind and pierce it’s way to the center, causing a system failure. Those boys sat, hour after hour, their minds working furiously, creating plans to bring their fantasies to life. They were sick of thinking about it, of dreaming about it, it was time to act, to finally become the demons from their story. Time was up. It was now up to them to mould the clay and breathe life into their creations.

 

Reviews

[269]

I am a curious person. My dad tried to remove the "why...why...why" we kids would ask. I still ask. I wonder what made you think of "a person to give up on themselves" & then the results of such an action? I've come to love short short stories. This one is great. It opens my mind to new ideas and what might happen after one does give up on themselves. Thanks, charly

[Calypso]

Wonderful. This reminds me of when I was a child. Back then I had dreams of being an author and I would spend hours daydreaming of the day when someone who read my shorties. Beautifully written.

[.]

An interesting little story. I think you have a good idea for a story here. I agree with Girlintheworld, in that the story could be longer, and I think it would make it more interesting. Developing the two boys as characters will make the situation they are in have more impact and really draw the reader in. I think it's a good start, and it could really go any way you wanted it to. I hope this helps a little. A fun read.

[Ravenskald]

Ah Kat you keep growing as a writer
nice work

R

[Girlintheworld]

Very intriquing, makes me want to know what they were thinking about. I would like to read the next chapter.

[[untitled]]

It's an interesting piece. I couldn't help but think how it applies so closely to my own novel.

Very well done!