What they say

ADD is different for anybody. In my case, I learned to adapt and live with it without having to take my meds. That's not going to work for everybody, I just had a good support system

They say ADD is just a nice way of saying 'you're dumb.' They say that if you have to take the time to process what someone has just told you only to have the memory slip from your grasp, you wouldn't get far in life.

I admit, sometimes it's a struggle. I don't take my meds because they make me feel like I would never be able to sleep again. My brain is wired differently and it makes me frustrated because when I write a sentence, it doesn't sound right to my own ears.

My sentences would go on an endless loop, never getting to the point. It's at this point I can't even remember what the point is.

My mom tells me I just need to study more and pay attention. My dad tells me it's just in my head. 

I get good grades, great grades and I'm proud of myself for that. I had to work hard for that and it took me years to finally get my first A on a test. I was thrilled.

My teachers were proud, even recommended me for a few scholarships after high school. 

My parents told me that I was finally growing up and gaining responsibility.

I thought I was already pretty responsible. I mean, I took care of my sister when my dad was in jail. I took care of my mom when she was diagnosed with cancer later that same year. 

I took care of myself when I realized that now I couldn't rely on my parents because they were living their own lives and dealing with their own problems.

There was a teacher, she was my special ed teacher. She believed in me when nobody else would. She pulled me up when I felt like there was no other option but to give up. She found out what was going on at home and offered to cook a few meals.

I never met a teacher like her. 

This year was my senior year of high school. The last 3 months got cancelled because of the pandemic. I was supposed to perform in Chicago with my orchestra, walk across the stage for graduation, and say goodbye.

I never got to do any of that. But that's okay.

Because I've learned that if I keep saying it's okay, maybe it wouldn't hurt so much.

I've learned to no listen to what they say because the only voice I should listen to is my own.

Author's Note

Sorry for the bad writing :) I'm not a writer and the closest thing I've had to a writing class was American Literature where we just analyzed other writings