Once born, then gone

You never realize how good you have it until it's gone. I've spent 8 out of my 13 schooling years looking forward to finally be done with high school. But now, as a senior, I'm realizing that high school is so much easier than life. In high school you are protected from the world. If you make a mistake you are given chance after chance after chance to correct yourself. 

But out there, in the real world, there's no room for error. I used to be very excited to finally be able to drive. I mean, it's freedom right? But now I'm learning that driving isn't a privilege. It's a responsibility. You are responsible for yourself and your actions and every move you make will determin the safety of yourself and those around you. It's a scary thought. 

I haven't even sat behind the wheel yet, and I'm already terrified of telling my driving teacher that I am ready to take the next step. Because the truth of the matter is, that I am not at all ready. I'm not ready to grow up. I'm not ready to graduate. I'm not ready to go to college and support myself and my future family. I'm not ready to drive. 

But I have to be ready because that is what is expected of me. I'm expected to walk up there and grab my diploma even though I don't want to walk on shaky legs to grab the paper that will strip me of the comfort of high school. I'm expected to know how money and bills work even though they haven't even tought us how to pay our taxes in school. I'm expected to turn a confusing situation into a situation where I actually know what I'm doing. I'm expected to grow up. 

I'm 17. I have a year. I have one single year left before I am no longer considered a child. This is the most scariest thing I've had to face. But I have made it this far, so why quit? Honestly, I didn't even expect to live to adult hood. I was always so sick, I thought I wouldn't have to worry about the future. I never thought about tomorrow because I was so afraid that tomorrow wouldn't come. 

When I was younger, I wouldn't want to fall asleep for fear of not waking up again. But I pushed through. I survived. And I'm about to leave behind my foot prints on this long road to success. 

Author's Note

It's been awhile :) I've had to work some things out before I felt comfortable enough to continue writing, but I'm back. Anyway thanks for reading <3

Reviews

[LazerRays]

sigh, im a junior and im dreading grauduating!!! i love high school...