Toothpaste

A life History with Toothpaste!

 

My little milk teeth white did gleam,

Mum and Daddy kept those clean.

With a tiny brush with suds and stuff,

Kept my Ivories bright and buffed.

 

Then a tooth waggled free

This was pure deight to me

To lose a tooth was no great grief

When fairy leaves sixpenny piece!

 

Older then, I brushed alone

With a Wisdom Brush to call my own,

Tooth Paste Powder in a tin

"Gibbs" I think, I scrubbed it in!

 

Teenage years still at school

Chose SR it seemed so cool.

In those years of Jive and Rock

I chilled like SR's Icy Block!

 

This clean routine I daily kept

Pondering "Which paste is best?"

Pepsodent seemed heaven sent,

Wondering "where the yellow went?"

 

Then the bite of strong Mcleans

Took me to my later teens.

This strongest "Mint" while I was young

For that sensual tongue meets tongue!

 

Dabbling with vile cigarettes,

I took the stongest tincture yet,

Fighting staining nicotine,

Euthymol Smokers Dental Cream. 

 

Advertisements were on TV,

Paste with Stripes, just for me

Red Stripe Mouthwash, White the paste

"Signal Toothpaste" in my face!

 

Each morning "Signal" I did wield

Then they changed its name to "Shield."

Next "Arm and Hammer" I did rate

Whitening with bicarbonate!

 

Countless Wisdoms  brushed to death

With Colgate, Crest and  Aquafresh.

All graced my pink and growing mouth

Brushed West and East and North and South!

 

The years remorselessly apply.

Enamel white's worn bye and bye.

Dentine yellowing took its place

Ignoring "Whitening" toothpaste.

 

In old age I have kept them all

Pre Molars and incisors tall.

Gums now withering to the jaw,

Electric flickers sharp and sore.

 

Old age comes!  You know for sure

The final paste change you endure.

From "Whitening" to "Sensitive!"

I wonder "Many years to live?" 

 

 

Author's Note

Harmless doggerel I think!!!!

Reviews

[EMF]

I DID NOT SMILE ONCE.

But I did laugh out loud.

A wonderfully silly pieces of nostalgia and yes, doggerel, but like the best nostalgia it sparks off memories left right and centre.
But your did miss out my Grandads favourite. Dentures and bleach.

Great work. 10/10

[Annie29]

I love it.
At first I thought it may just a riddle about toothpaste,
but i discovered it's actually a life to death tale.
Reminded me of a book called 'Our Town' by Thornton Wilder.
Wonderful write.

[Nobody.]

Made me smile....then brush....then smile again! :) Good stuff.

[MaryP]

It's weird that the most mundane things in our life can show so much about our development as a person...
Loved the poem, great write.

[JC]

ha, cool man, reminds me of a judge dread song, whika taka whika taka tya...enjoyed it.

[OT]

a light-hearted fun read! and very British! nice!!

[G. K. Bostic]

That was a fun read and well enjoyed. It kept me smiling throughout.
Gloria

[Detective Watts]

Your so British. Words like ivories and sixpenny bring a smile to my heart and joy to my face.

[KAREN]

I smiled the whole time I was reading this and I needed to smile today! Thanks!!!

[KATHY SUE SILLS]

Ron, this was so Hummorous! I loved it, you did a remarkable job writing it!