I Knew This Girl Once...

I am anorexic. Just thought you needed to know before I continued.

Why do you need to know? You'll find out soon, I promise.

I know most people deny that they have anorexia.

But the thing is, I'm not 'most people'. I've experienced and learnt so much in my short 14 years. So here goes:

I knew this girl once, she hated life. She had so many problems.

But they were problems she could have fought off before they started.

The problem was, she didn't. She let them consume her. Consume her thoughts.

Soon, they would consume her whole life, driving her to a point of recklessness.

Everyday, she'd go to school looking thinner and thinner. 

And everyday, the teachers noticed, but never said anything.

They would procrastinate, saying to one another that they would soon hold an intervention.

But as each day came and went, the intervention was put off.

The teachers knew they should intervene, call the girl's parents.

But they didn't. There was this...aura surrounding the girl, 

Nobody knew how to describe it, but there was definitely something.

The teachers knew they should let the girl's parents solve the problem.

One week later, all teachers and staff noticed the sickly thin girl coming to school.

Nobody made a move to help the girl, everybody felt that it wasn't there turn to speak up.

Everybody waited for a day to come by when the girl would fatten up,

A sure sign that she was getting better and being treated.

Soon, all the students noticed too. Many tried to help her, got teachers involved.

But all she did was, ignore everybody, and denied there help.

Others bullied her relentlessly, but despite the harsh words, she didn't shed a single tear.

Worst of all, many continued to stand out of her way, letting this all continue.

Nobody tried to help her after a few days, nobody was strong or willing enough to put up a fight with her,

So they let her be. If only someone hadn't given up on her, she may have gotten better.

But who knew when that'd happen, or who'd be her saving grace?

Nobody knew if she would eventually be brave and wiling enough to ask for the help she desperately needed.

The day after, the school received a letter from the girl's parents. It was simple.

The note told them that their daughter was gone. 

No, not gone, disappeared, but gone, forever, gone from Earth.

That was it. Just a simple note, saying that the girl was dead.

Seeing for herself, the girl knew nobody cared for her, not teachers, and definitely not students.

So one day, she showed everyone her scars, bruises and burns.

They were all accumulated from her parents, over the past ten years of her life.

She showed them to the world, knowing that when the day ended, she'd be here no more.

The teachers in the school felt distraught, knowing that if they had helped 

And intervened much earlier, maybe the girl would not have ended her life at such a young age.

Yet, the teachers knew they were the ones to blame. They were the ones 

Who didn't do anything, and let it continue. 

She was my saviour, my lifeline. Who was she, and how did I know her, you ask?

She was my twin sister, and her name was Annamarie. She was the face of perfection, 

But she was the perfect example. The perfect example of a life gone wrong, distorted into a life

That nobody should ever have to go through, least of all her. My sweet angel.

And so I'm trying to quit. I'm trying to eat more and weigh at a perfect, average weight girls 

My age would be expected to weigh. nothing more, nothing less. Just perfect.

I'm doing this for her, Annamarie, trying to live the life I know she wanted for so long.

And I'm doing this for myself, knowing that unless I want to end up like my sister, I'd have to try to stop,

Unless I'd want to have thoughts that consumed every fibre of my living soul, 

To be consumed by the monster the thoughts have created, I cannot continue living like this.

So if you ever need help in trying to quit, don't be afraid to ask for it. I have. 

It's not easy, yes, and it's going to be a tough ride, but it will be worth every struggle.

I knew this girl once, who was my saviour, my angel. She was my twin.

Author's Note

What do you think about this free verse, albeit long, poem? Any errors or things that I could possibly fix? Thankyou!

Reviews

[Isadora Swift]

I really love this! "the monster the thoughts have created" and "thoughts that consumed every fibre of my living soul" are my favourite phrases. Such a well thought out and deep poem!

[1Disawsum]

Thankyou so much, I had to do something more unique for this poem, as I hold this very close to my heart. Thankyou, really appreciated the help! :) Maybe I'll add more phrases like that in later poems :)

[Isadora Swift]

The phrases link really well together, and both create interesting imagery! I hope you do, this is great!

[1Disawsum]

haha thanks again :D very helpful comments from you! Appreciated

[Sarah]

There are a few spelling errors but other than that this is a fantastic poem... i am so sorry your twin had to go through all of that. I know how it feels though i never almost lost a sister i almost lost myself.Thank you for sharing this

[1Disawsum]

Thankyou! This is very helpful, and next time, I'll be sure to proof-read my work. I didn't on this and the others because I was in a rush (*sigh* excuses, excuses, I know! But it's true aha). I'm so sorry, I'm glad you found yourself before it was too late. Remember, no matter what you're going through, you can survive it. No matter what. Thankyou for reviewing! :)