Lost

      He looked at me in the eyes and understood my pain the second he saw me. "I know what it is you wanted to find," He whispered dirty things to my ear but it seemed like those words were the sweetest filth I have ever heard. "You will find in me." His voice was husky. It sounded dangerous, raspy but captivating ---- as if trying to make me sweetly surrender to him.

Might I ever allow his hand slip between my thighs, hushing him, asking for a little while. For as tempting as a demon can be, he can also be as bad as he like. My legs lock, quiver then shake. I turned to look at him only to see he is temptation itself, before him is myself caged in his eyes like I was his only prey. For the first time, I questioned myself. Am I really willing to give what he will take?

    "Don't think." He hushed me with his lips pressed against mine in ecstasy. "When you followed me it only means you agree." His embrace felt cold, the absence of warmth was inevitable. The feeling that rushed through my body was pleasing and gratifying. It was his doing to break me completely away from all decency. To become a woman I never thought I secretly wanted to be.

A song of young maiden left my lips. Between the lament of pain and exhale of relief, he used it as a guide by the inconsistent harmony the two of us made. Cursing, gasping, toes curling while my skin turned pale --- afraid of what will happen in the aftermath of the divine executing the decree for my lack of faith. My defense is that he is heaven in earth that was made.

What I didn't know is that he shed his identity in various name. He was known quite to be a cruel deceiver and bad news. But to me he's heaven and my refuge.

     That he my heaven, an angel I looked up to, made me feel secure but only the time when he wants to. In my solitude, my heart discerned that the deceiver as he is made me forced me into a judgement: I chose to suffer than to be lonely.

Now, my breath trembles when he's near. My legs remained locked out of fear. Like a flower looking fragile before it was picked, I had gone back in time when he first saw me. Slowly, softly like a liquor that was poured in my lips, the feeling he gave me softened my heart while he placed his hands on my hips.

    My back felt cold against the fresh beating the morning breeze offered. Once again, his name escaped my lips, fingers gripping his back while my eyes are closed. I imagined myself under a blindfold, fooling myself, that in his delirium it is as if I was never once cold.

Dawn came again for the nth time. The hands of the clock were in reverse and the thought of him came back as I stare in the emptiness of the daylight. I was another of him that is incapable of love. Both of us that have empty heart know that we can't fill what we lack.

He said this is what they call love. But is this what we truly have?

I am on my knees; a reckless abandon. His used shirt clung to my body made me realize the sanction.

What a man of a thousand young's dream!

What a man that can be named as the deceitful king!

He is mischievous and wicked, so by all means you meet him, run while you still can.