The Never Setting Empire

Well, my history teacher would be proud.

The sun never set on the British Empire
And it never sets on mine;
I sit in oceans of iron and salt,
I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine.

Silvery setting suns
Scarring scarlet shimmering sin,
Brushstrokes with santokus,
Keeping my demons in.

White lines,
Wrapped in wet dreams for strange places
Blades slice smooth, so what's your excuse,
So much blood in so many faces.

White rooms and ragged pie plates
You know the sun never sets here
Would not the navy would love my eyes,
Sails on every pier.

Reviews

[unsavable_soul]

This is elegant,
Such a beautiful flow to this work. Your opener to this with the ending of the stanza as I'm fine repeated has a very strong impact. I also am a big fan of the correlation between Britain's empire and it's well known navy of the time is quite appealing. The ending did leave me a bit lost to it's meaning with sails on every pier, but elusiveness is a very useful in leaving mystery and contemplation to a piece.
This is quite the piece,
Sincerely
Christopher

[Gianna Dale]

Beautiful. I read it a while back and was amazed, but in a rush forgot to comment. So well done, truly a very intriguing work. You're very intelligent, and combing that with creativity makes for the best. So well done my friend.
Always and forever,
Gianna

[Omar Fendri]

"Blades slice smooth, so what's your excuse,
So much blood in so many faces." these two lines are astounding. I adore this piece of writing. The delicate mystical way of describing in this piece is sublime. -untarnished- ...

[zainul]

Wonderful beauteous piece.
You may love to replace 'sets' for 'set' in the first line.

[Maria Linden]

Wait what? Set is in the first line, sets is in the second. Britain doesn't own the world anymore haha.... But thanks!!!

[zainul]

The Commonwealth seems to be an effort to remember its past glory.
You probably enjoyed writing on such topic.
You mentioned that the history teacher would be proud.
How the history teacher influenced you to write this lovely piece?

[Maria Linden]

People used to say that the sun never set on the British empire, because the empire was so big that it was always daytime somewhere. I though that was an interesting concept so I related it to my poetry:)

[zainul]

I loved your rhyming.
You took a really interesting concept for your piece.

[Luke L]

Lovely piece that's gorgeous. Why do you want to move to London?

[Maria Linden]

Thanks:) and because big cities intrigue me, I'm not scared of them and London has one of the most interesting literary histories (mainly due to the amount of hopeless drug addicts that turned into our classic poets). It's my second-favorite city next to Berlin, and I don't actually speak German so the language barrier would be a tad difficult.

[Luke L]

you're welcome where are you from miss? I just picture you saying "cheerio" and "bloody ell" to sound more British hahaha, but are you British already?

[Maria Linden]

No I'm not, actually:) I'm American. I don't try to sound British haha:)

[Luke L]

alrighty :p You should try accents they're fun to f**k with :p

[Maria Linden]

They would be if I was better at them! I've a hopelessly American way of speaking haha.

[Just Kim]

This is wonderful, Like the imagery alot.
Love the rhyme scheme and flow as well.

White rooms and ragged pie plates
You know the sun never sets here
Britain's navy would love my eyes,
Sails on every pier.

Love this part. amazingly done!

[decemberalways]

Is this a longing to be in the UK, because that's what I'm getting from this. A certain bitterness. Maybe not? Haha. Nice nonetheless.

[Maria Linden]

You know, it's actually not. I'd love to live there at some point in my life, but in this I used it simply because it provided good metaphors for what I was trying to say and the whole poem came for the phrase the sun never sets on the British empire- not the meaning of it, but that's where I got the idea.