REBIRTH

A prose poem about the Chilean miners experience.

Mighty Earth traps me in its grasp; crushing eons of accumulated time descend around my fragile shell. Terror consumes me as once living screams echo off dead stone.  Choking dust strangles me; fate surrounds me with a bubble of life.  Dark as the darkest death, my coffin lid 2000-feet thick, I pray to heaven, although I am closer to hell. 

 

  Mumbled sounds, I’m not alone.  I feel flesh on my flesh, a hand reaching out, lives immerge, then more.  Surrounded by brothers, children of my youth, now partners in tragedy.  We shall die as one, sealed in the warm steamy womb of Mother Earth, our sustainer, now executioner.  We cry helpless, hopeless reaching out to god, the god that we ignore in the loud noises of the cantina, as we drink and dance to conceal our fear.  Now entombed I feel god is near, listening.  “Oh, please save me and my brothers.”

 

  Some talk of hope, “They will not forsake us.”  I gather courage from my brothers, as a tree absorbs light.  Faith keeps us alive.  Little food or water to sustain our bodies, without faith our souls will die and all is lost.  We hold our comrades and nurture them like babies, with tender words and soft caresses.  The strong sustain the weak, encouraging; building a framework for hope. 

  

  “Silence! Listen,” sound feeble, weak, but sound!   A new determination swells within.  “We must survive! They are coming!”  We plan, organize, optimize our chances.  “We are men, miners, proud, not sniffling rabbits!”  Sound increasing day by day, and with a burst a break through, umbilical to the world, a lifeline!  Our joy immeasurable, life once again baths us with sustaining gifts: food, water, light, the blessed present of human voices speaking through the belly of the earth.

 

  Hope explodes with joyous reverberations in our breasts.  But wait, we are still captives of solid stone, encased by the fickle whims of fate.  Crushing stone, our ceiling, gravity the trigger for instantaneous death.  Our loved ones witness to our demise heard through  wire, massive sound then stillness, the cold quiet of death.  We swallow hard as one, our brains are in perfect sink:  “Its not over yet.”   We regroup and steel ourselves for many days ahead of waiting, knowing our survival anything but a sure thing.

 

  New sounds develop as our birth canal takes form. Days and endless days go by, first one, then another and after that, another and then some more.  Tedium upon tedium, waiting, listening, anticipating.  Knowing the world is now watching, we think about our lives to come as we prepare for birth.  What is to come?

 

  The world breaking through once again our birth imminent; a passage 2000 feet long awaits.  Concealed in our womb we embrace knowing our seed was strong, we survived.  I break my placental bonds and prepare for my birth.  Encased in steel I begin the long dangerous passage.  I see light!  I feel fresh air!  I’m born into the world crying with joy!

 

Reviews

[Priscilla Sayers]

I FELT every part, every word, every syllable. A captivating read. A memory sparked. A beautiful writing, pure art!!!!

[Robbie~xoxo~]

Amazing! I cannot express to you how profound this piece is... Completely captivating! You have truly depicted vivid images of rebirth, in more ways than one... I felt the claustrophic scenery and terrified emotions...This was an overwhelming read! Great write!

[Liza]

An interesting metaphorical play on mother's womb to a coal mine....the end of darkness, the end of struggle and tight spaces. the workers cry with joy; while the baby - we'll never know...are they really happy or afraid when they are first born? something we'll never know :)

[StoryTailor]

You know, I've read a poem like this in a real long while. And I couldn't dream of writing one for even longer!
So, I'm not sure if I'm the best person to be reviewing this. I can't give you any advice, but I can tell you that I really, really, liked it. It was easy for me to keep reading until it was finished. And even then I reread it to make sure that I had read all of it, detail for detail.

[Emily Quinn]

What a rollar coaster of emotions, I'm sure if those poor miners read this they would feel like the words were taken from their own exhausted minds and souls What great descriptions, amazing analogies and true feeling as solid as the rock from which they broke from. I loved this poem, it's very real and touching.
A wonderful tribute to their strength.

[HopelesslyDevoted]

this is beautiful, scary, and wonderful all at once. each word of the writing kept me wanting to read on and kept me sitting on the edge of my seat with suspense. you definitely have a talent for this style of writing, great imagery and metaphors. its almost as if you were one of those miners the way you wrote is so vivid and strong.

[Stammers]

my coffin lid 2000-feet thick - very effective. With something like this, I think you should always go over it, not because it needs it, but because it's worth it.

You really fleshed this event out into something touchable, with some great lines and ideas, wish I had the time to review this in more detail! Brave write, shows that you emerged yourself somewhere else, and this is what you brought back up.

[Taylor H.]

Im not very good at analyzing poems. But this was a very good Prose. You should do more of these, you're very talented at them.

[Mauricio Montoya]

all I can say is WOW.