What I believe

I believe in a place

Where we all must go

And the winds don’t blow

I believe in a place

Where sorrow has no name

And pain is a game

I believe in a place

Where everyone is happy

No one is alone

And everyone has somebody

No one will cry

Cause no one will die

And we will live forever in eternity

I believe

Yes I believe

That the place in the dreams

Is a reality

It has to be out there

A place where we are happy

It’s hard to believe

But I believe

What I believe

Is in peace

What I believe

Is in love

What I believe

Is what we all should believe

That one day, we well be

In the gardens of eve

Or heaven's gates above

@Ashley.M.E.

Reviews

[alesuriko]

Some criticism first... This line "Where we all most go" you probably mean "must" instead of "most". If it's most... it should be "Where most of us go". Then in the line "No will cry" you forgot a "one" after "No". Also, in the last line "Or heavens gates above" there should be an apostrophe in "heaven's". For the most part, your poem has good expression in what you believe in. It was lacking in flow and rhythm for me. Those who are religious will probably relate though.

[Faceless Love]

I love how peaceful this poem sounds. You did a great job.

[Rain Kissed Secret]

I think you did alright. It's not the best, and it could be improved.. but it was smile inducing and relaxing to think that everything we're going through is just the price we have to pay for peace

[RDOriginal]

You've done a really good job of putting together a poem that's so optimistic. I think most poets seem to focus on the tragedy of life and misery and it was very refreshing to read something so upbeat.

The repetition of the phrase, "I believe" throughout the first part of the poem is well balanced but towards the end the balance seems a little upset by the use of such small statements about what you believe. It's just personal opinion of course but the section, "But I believe What I believe Is in peace What I believe Is in love What I Believe..." seems to be a little too heavy on the word "believe".

As I said before, it's nice to read something so positive and even if someone has a different view of the afterlife I'm sure they can still appreciate yours.

[James Bonner]

What I believe is in peace. This does hint of "imagine". Impressive.

[Marie Harrison]

Your poem is beautiful Ashley. It's very inspiring. This is a different type of write for you. I enjoyed it a lot!

[Mauricio Montoya]

A very good piece, excellent write

[Faye]

Not too sure about the structure, mayby thats just me tho. Otherwise very good.

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

what a beautiful hope filled poetic~ =)~

[Abdul Aziz]

Beautifully written. Makes one remember "Imagine" by John Lennon. You've conveyed your thoughts beautifully in words. Life is simple, if everyone follows the dictum of doing good, in hope of getting the eternal reward.

P.S. There is a typo in the title.

[Dinesh Sairam]

Skewed parts of early lucid dreams. I'll always dream of such a place, and dream and dream only. :( Beautifully told. Straight to my favorites -- Need I say more? :)