A Rose, Skull & Cross Bones

In the pits of despair

There is always light

After midnight

There will always come light

 

All bad is revolved

All good is seen

A mixture in-between

We all can do wrong

 

No one is perfect

Not everyone is pure

We are born with no sin

But that is obscured

 

We can see through darkness

But we see it in our own past

No matter how right

Not everything lasts

 

In a place where we are balanced

At times we can change

All it takes is a moment

And nothing will be the same

 

On moment you’re a rose

Nothing wrong and only pure

Your thorns protecting you

Protecting you from all that is unknown

 

Though your guard can’t last forever

Your petals will always wilt

You’ll find your pureness dying

And find yourself in guilt

 

We may not be perfect

In a world that left us alone

Though at this moment

You are not just a skull and crossed bones

@All rights reserved by Ashley.M.E.

Reviews

[Crowley]

Fixes first....

4th Stanza, "out own past" to "our own past"
Second to last stanza, peddles should be pettles

This was really lovely sentiment, rooted in the way that wlife really works sometimes. Its our attitude and percepptions about the context that we live in that allow is to make moere with less. Good job.

[Larry Dyson]

flows very well..I prefer prose and this is well put together ...emotive...good concept...The Rose Society?

[r]

Wow. Amazing. I loved it all the way through. Beautiful, awesome, wonderful imagery. It really got across it, and i love the last line. The rhyming scheme was very awesome, and I loved the way you wrote this.

[Angie Diane♥&hea..]

This is very nicely written I agree. I think that everything fit together and it flowed well. I have nothing else to say on the matter. Thanks for sharing. :)

[MiidniightSoul]

A very powerful poem. Very beautifully written. I escpecially like the line "Though your guard can’t last forever your petals will always wilt you’ll find your pureness dying and find yourself in guilt. " This one is amazing. Great job.

[alesuriko]

Wonderfully written. I really enjoyed reading this poem. I only noticed three things in this poem that can be improved upon. The line "But we see it in our own past" doesn't seem to fit the rhythm/flow of the poem because it's too wordy, perhaps it would be better without "own". Secondly, in the third to last stanza, first line, it should be "One moment" instead of "On moment". And the last one isn't really an error, only my personal opinion that it would flow better without repeating "Protecting you" in the last line of the third to last stanza. Also, the last line, doesn't seem to flow either, it's a little too wordy. Maybe contracting the first two words to "You're" would be better.

Other than that, your rhythm and flow is near flawless with this poem. I enjoyed reading it and it flowed so smoothly from line to line. Nice dark vibe.

[Roslyn Rosalie]

Very good Ashley! You are an amazing poet.

[Gone]

Another good poem Ashley. Well written.

:-)

[chaotic katie]

great write i loved this

[Rain Kissed Secret]

I think this is beautifully written, I think you can try and makes it flow more, but you don't have to. All together, nicely done.
Rain

[the pup]

very good concept for only a teenager even to me that is nice how you look at the world in both elements I congratulate on well thought piece of written structure so you get all points good job.